From Chapter 6
"Come on Robert, are we finished yet?" I hear Susan say to me as we get to the end of the stocktake, "Just finishing now honey" I reply. So while I put everything back into some sort of order, she starts to close the curtains. Just as they close, Peter walks into the stall, and precedes to say 'Hi'. Peter was Davies brother in law, and a close personal family friend. I speak to him for a few minutes while my back is turned, as I turn around I notice Susan pulling her hand away from him. At this time I never really took much notice because I thought she had maybe just brushed past him. However, as I was to realise later on, this was not really an accident. I finish counting the days takings, and locked up. As we started to walk away, I happened to notice that Susans eyes where directed at Peter, this was something I had never noticed before, that she would look at another guy in that seductive way of hers. I put it out of my mind and announced to her "race you to the car", so we both get to the car and drive home.
Halfway along the road I start to think back to my racing days, and it was a time when we were in a disco this saturday night. Susan was dancing with another mate of mine called Joe, the memory came about him telling me that she had 'touched him up', but with me being me, I did not believe this. Once we reached the house, I discovered that I had left the float for the following day, so I ask her to take me back to get it. the reason I wanted this was because there had been some burglaries from the stalls in previous years, and I could not afford that to happen to me. After I get the float and return to the car, I ask her to turn the car off as I wanted to ask her something.
She does this and asks "Whats up?", So I say I saw the looks between you and Peter, and the hand touching, is something going on?" "NO, THERE IS NOT" she answers, so I accept this, and mutter "Ok, forget it". Although I had accepted this there was something in her voice that told me she was not telling me the truth, it wa just a feeling I had. So we drive home and for the rest of the night, nothing is mentioned between us, the atmosphere is so thick between us, that it could be cut with a knive. The next morning when I awoke, awake thats a laugh, I had not slept a wink all night, that evenings thoughts were going round in my mind. But when I did get up, I just went straight to work without speaking to Susan.
From Chapter 7
That is a good point I make here. If you are interested in something you will give 100 percent, but if you don't like it, then you will get less effort put into it. Religion is also a non event for me. Yes I wil go to church when the need arises, you know, weddings and funerals etc. Other than that, nothing, it's not that I don't believe in spirituality, but everyone to their own. There 'IS' something up there, but what it is, I don't know for sure. I believe that Religion was invented to keep the masses in check, and that it was made up for them to believe in something. I will not argue about it, but it's what I believe. I must admit though, all through my school years and early life, I suppose I did believe in God. However, that was taken away from me in 1993, when my neice 'Andrea', died aged only 7 days old as a result of a 'Cot Death'.. This is something I couldn't and still can't quite understand about God, if there is one? How could he let a baby die or lett all the suffering in the world go on, when there are so many 'evil' people on this earth of ours. A question often runs through my mind and that is, 'Why' did he make people small or tall, AND let them have diseases and illness's, don't they suffer enough without the extra burden?
There has to be something in my mind that is worse than being small. Yes I can think of a number of things, the big 'C' for one, Yes Cancer is one of them. We had just found out that Susan's dad Charlie after his triple heart bypass, had also contracted cancer. He must have had it for a while because he had to go back into hospital to get it removed.
However, the operation to remove it was unsuccessful, all of it could not be touched and was still eating away at him. We found out that he only had a few weeks left on this earth, at the point of writing this book, which of course we are so sorry about.. Just lately I have looked at my father in law and think that, 'that' could have been me? Yes I am small, but at least I have every organ working. I am NOT suffering as much as him or others with this disease, what the hell have I got to be miserable about?
As I sit here and start to think bout Charlie and Lambourn, my thoughts turn to the time I got my first proper ride on the course.
