Uncharted territory

[Philip]

Hello,
to my knowledge, I have not been the subject of a woman's dreams, certainly not an x-rated dream - well, not until now.
I am going to Changsha in May with eyes open, with no map, no compass, no reference points.
45, never married, skeptic and dreamer in equal measure wltm 23 year old Chinese lady after correspondence for a mere month in which it seems we are both in love with each other and we can be quite matter-of-fact about how many children we will have and where we will live.
Hmmmmm
Alex

[victor-hills]

Alex best of luck mate i have to say i hade a girlfend she was 23 ill neaver do it agen but peeps are defrent so best of luck.

[Carl]

You may have to run to keep up with her, Alex.   Best wishes!

[Arnold]

Alex , I don't want to rain on your Parade , but ... 45 and 23 and on top of that , only one month of writing and getting to know each other I can't get past , how a couple can talk about having kid's in such a short time . One of you or both of you are rushing into something , that did not have enough time to develope , into that kind of relationship . Please , stop and think that over one more time for not only your good ,but your Lady's as well .
This advice is not mend to tell you how to live your Life , just to think it over again . If it work's for you this way , I'm all behind you . Good Luck .

[AtAltitude]

Hey Alex buddy,

Congrats on the excitement, and keep it all in perspective.  I am going to agree with Arnold on this one...  Best to proceed cautiously.  You can be cautiously optimistic, but between the brevity of time and the rather significant difference in age, there are two things to combat.  

So do your homework...keep up the positive thoughts, and take a big deep breath.  All the best.

[Bob]

Not my business, however I also agree with Arnold, slow down. You are setting yourself up for a fall, a very big fall. The age difference is way off :shock: , ya sure, the sex will be great (be honest) but chances are it won't last, you can't possibly think the same way on matters, you both come from a different generation,culture, and so on. I just would not like to see a fellow member fall on his face. Just my 2 cents, take it or leave it. :?

Personally I would never date/marry a women that is more then 5 years younger then I, actually my wife is 2.5 years older then me, ha ha  :lol:

Like Arnold has mentioned, we are not here to tell you how to run your life, we are just trying to talk sense into you like any good friend would do.

[Philip]

Hi,
thanks everyone for your posts and words of wisdom. I know a month isn't a long time and I acknowledge my tendency to get carried away. I am going to spend the next two months before I meet her finding out more about the things we have in common. I have taken lots of people's advice about asking direct questions. That's where the children thing came. I felt I needed to know as I am serious about wanting a family. Perhaps three months will still be too short a time, but my next holiday comes up then.
I have just been on a work trip to Bangladesh for a week and there was no opportunity for me to use the internet. Don't know if that was a good thing, but perhaps has given us the chance to slow down. I don't know. We do talk about many different things, values, aspirations, work, family, interests and as much as you can tell in an email, it seems we have a remarkable amount in common. Yes the age times cultural differences would seem to compound the potential barriers to any relationship, and it requires a leap of faith on both our parts, but I am serious about making it work.
I am as sure as one can be that I am writing to her and not her translator, and it would upset me if I found out it wasn't her. I know there are many things I won't know until I meet her and even after that, but it seems to be really happening for us.
I do read and absorb all the forums (fora?) and some of them pour cold water over my ideas and others reinforce them. As I said I am going in with my eyes open.
best wishes
Alex

[Peter]

Welcome to Changsha Alex.. I just left this great city and my lady and are planning to go back in July or August to get married.. Both Martin and I love the city and the food so I can almost promise you that you wouldn't get disappointed. If there is some tips you would like to have I am more than willing to share my experience.

[Philip]

Hi Peter,
have you had any dealings with the Changsha Love Bridge agency? Do you know whether they're a generally good agency or not? Also, what are the sights not to miss? I am going for a week at the end of May. Thanks. Alex

[RobertBfrom aust]

Hello Alex , you do not note where you are from , but I think that Changsha will blow you away , great food , great people and lots of sightseeing that you can do .
I was there in September for a couple of weeks and could have stayed longer , both p216 and p218 are pretty good agencies , just dot your i's and cross your t's and make sure you have a good translating machine Besta or similar , with a writing stylus , as apart from airport pickup with my lady we did not use the agency translator at all so money saved paid for the machine .
 A few times the agency just rang to make sure all was okay but apart from that we were on our own , like with Peter any queries just yell .

[Philip]

Thanks Robert,
I am from London, England. It is good to know about Changsha. My lady was born there and she has some ideas about things to do, but she says she would love to do anything I wanted. I have heard about the Yuelu mountain and park, but can you give me a few other sightseeing musts around the city?
I am using an agency translator for the first 4 days AND I have the latest Besta translator, so I should be fine.
Thanks for info about agencies - I have heard 1 bad story about my agency, so was a little concerned.
Hope  you have found someone
Alex

[Peter]

Hi Peter,
have you had any dealings with the Changsha Love Bridge agency? Do you know whether they're a generally good agency or not? Also, what are the sights not to miss? I am going for a week at the end of May. Thanks. Alex

Sorry I have no idea about that agency.. I know that someone had a bad experience with one of the 3 agency's and it wasn't the one I have: ChangSha MeiYin International Marriage Introduction Company. I have meet the owner of this one and also our translator and they seems to be o.k.
There is a lot to see in Changsha. The walking streets in the center and a block nearer the river is great for shopping. Enjoy the food even if it´s filled with Chili, really good. Visit the museum and the big park near the museum, the Martyrs Park. Go for a walk by the river. Climb Mount  Yuelu... I had 12 days there and I didn't have time to do everything. Try to go to a show too.. Changsha is famous for the artists and shows. Martin and I went with our ladies and even if we didn't understand the language is was a very good show. We also went to a show with Tibetan dancing and it was great. Just enjoy the city because it is great.

[RobertBfrom aust]

Hi again Alex , Peter has covered a number of the must do's and I am sure your lady as did mine , knowing the city will be totally organized , the taxi ride from the airport will widen your eyes and from then just hang on and enjoy , you may not need the agency translator for that long , I found the Besta more than excellent for communicating after 24hours , so use it to ask your lady when to go to a two as 3 can be a crowd hehe . I stayed at the Huatian hotel in the central area and it was great , let your lady go with you to a convenience store and let her pick the correct water to drink along with any other goodies that are required , the in room fridge goodies can be expensive and never is there enough .
I am heading back in early August to ChongQing so whereas Changsha has about 6-7 mill our new city has 30 + mill a total eye opener . Any other questions just yell , regards Robert .

[Vince G]

So the Besta is the way to go? Do you have a model number? My lady has said recently the translator she has isn't to good. I'll suggest this one and see if she can find one there. Seems she buys her electronics second hand. So we'll see.

[RobertBfrom aust]

Hi Vince , checkout , www. powerdictionary.com they have the Besta md8290 that I used but now there are more powerful models on market just make sure it has fixed in rechargable battery and all the connections you require , I will more than likely upgrade to a md300 Wi Fi if they are okay , they are definitely cheaper online at this site than in Changsha by about 30 percent , any queries just yell , regards , Robert .