Author Topic: What do you guys think?  (Read 18044 times)

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Offline Josh Markley

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What do you guys think?
« on: March 29, 2009, 09:35:11 pm »
I met my girl Le back in dec. She had sent me an admiration letter. I had not been on the site for at least six months. I was dating an adopted korean girl who basically thought I needed to be her sugar daddy. When I saw Le's message I cut the rope on the korean girl. I was really into her first message it really made me want to get to know her. So I have been talking to her twice a week for the past few months. I have over looked alot of things chalking it up to cultural differences. Like our first few message she always replied with the very same things. I would also ask her questions and they would be totaly ignored. I also know this girl has a life outside of me, but the replies I am recieving now are getting shorter and shorter. I mean I will fill out the whole 6000 characters, her letters are much shorter. She used to tell me she misses me and can't wait to hear from me. I do not see this anymore? Do you guys think she is backing out? I think I just might be crazy, because I want this so badly i might just be freaking myself out. Well here is a copy of my last note.
My dearest Joshua:

How are you today? I hope you are doing well! I am so happy to receive your letter today! You always on my mind, my baby, please don't worry about it, ok? Haha~ these days are very cold, the weather is unusual, so, I also hope you could take care of yourself for me!

So, you made a chinese name for yourself? Meng Zhi Shen? Do you like it? Haha~ which is the family name? I don't know the meaning of it, but if you like it so much, please keep it for yourself!

You always show your feeling in detail, and I could understand them very well, I know that every word comes from your heart, they makes me feel so warm in the cold days, I feel that your love is so strong to me, and I want to treasure it.

Thank you so much for your pics, I always be happy to see them, you make me feel so happy in life, I would like to contact more with you, because you make my life to be colorful. Please never doubt about your letter, it always touch me a lot, I am not good at express my feeling, hope you don't mind about it!

Take care and have a nice day!


Yours,
Le
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Offline maxx

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #1 on: March 29, 2009, 10:05:43 pm »
Josh I can't see nothing wrong with the letter.It looks like your approach needs some help.

You said you started talking to the lady in December.Writing 2 times a weak.I think it is time to step the game up a little bit.Get her phone # tell her you want to hear her sweet voice.No matter how bad her English is.Have you sent the lady flowers?.Have you told her what day you are going to China?

Josh if you don't start moving this relationship forward.This lady will loose interest.And then you have an expensive pen pal

Offline Robertt S

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #2 on: March 29, 2009, 10:09:05 pm »
Hey Josh,
       I wouldn't start freaking out yet! If you are wondering about her feelings towards you, wait a few days and see if she contacts you to check on you! She could have a different work schedule that makes it hard to collect and return letters immediately. I am not sure how you two are communicating, but I am using the emf service and I know that due to my girls work schedule and the agency hours are not always in sync., so I have to wait until she has time to go there and collect my letter and write her answer before the agency closes. The long work days make a long reply difficult sometimes, not to mention having to travel back and forth to the agency. Anyway, I wouldn't panic yet, maybe spell your concerns out to her so she will understand your feelings.

Offline Josh Markley

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #3 on: March 29, 2009, 10:48:54 pm »
Quote from: "maxx"
Josh I can't see nothing wrong with the letter.It looks like your approach needs some help.

You said you started talking to the lady in December.Writing 2 times a weak.I think it is time to step the game up a little bit.Get her phone # tell her you want to hear her sweet voice.No matter how bad her English is.Have you sent the lady flowers?.Have you told her what day you are going to China?

Josh if you don't start moving this relationship forward.This lady will loose interest.And then you have an expensive pen pal

Maxx,

Yes I had suggested that we start having more communication, I was ging to start sending her more messages. She said she does not have a computer so no e-mail. She did give me her number I have not talked to her on the phone yet maybe that will be the next step I take. I hope she agrees I had asked once before but never answered the question. I have never sent her flowers but I was going to get on that tomorrow. I did send her a valetines gift but she never recieved it. I have not told her but I plan on a trip in july of november. Thanks for the info Maxx.
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Offline Josh Markley

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #4 on: March 29, 2009, 10:54:40 pm »
Quote from: "Robert Snellgrove"
Hey Josh,
       I wouldn't start freaking out yet! If you are wondering about her feelings towards you, wait a few days and see if she contacts you to check on you! She could have a different work schedule that makes it hard to collect and return letters immediately. I am not sure how you two are communicating, but I am using the emf service and I know that due to my girls work schedule and the agency hours are not always in sync., so I have to wait until she has time to go there and collect my letter and write her answer before the agency closes. The long work days make a long reply difficult sometimes, not to mention having to travel back and forth to the agency. Anyway, I wouldn't panic yet, maybe spell your concerns out to her so she will understand your feelings.

Robert,
  The first contact was the only first step she has taken.  I was sick with brochititis and in the hospital for a week and was unable to contact when I usually do. She did not see if I was okay then. I sent her a message after i got out explaining. I was confused why she had not tried to contact find out what was wrong.

Thanks for your info
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Offline Josh Markley

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #5 on: March 29, 2009, 10:58:04 pm »
Quote from: "Vince G"
Hate to say it but I don't see anything in there that makes me think there's anything more then like a penpal. It's empty, generic and seems almost like a form letter. I would walk away. Here's a difference, part of a letter from my lady.

My darling, I hope there will be no misunderstandings between us, right? Your Song is always here missing you. and no matter what happened, I just hope you can remember that I love you and I will always remember you love me! :)

See a difference? Don't know how much you have into this but doesn't sound like something I would count on.

That is what I used to get except for the love she said she has never loved before, but she knows how i love her. Boy I hope you are wrong.
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Offline Hajo

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #6 on: March 30, 2009, 12:18:25 am »
Josh, I know what you are going through. I had the same doubts and was almost going nuts about it. My letters used although to be very long. But it took time to compose them. I figured, my lady doesn't have a couple of hours to do that at the agency. So, her letters are bit short, too. And if it was the agency/translator playing with you, you would probably get one each day.

If have been suggested to involve the translator. I did and it seems to pay off. Just ask the translator to encourage your lady. I left a message in the body of my letter.

If I were you, I would tell her about planning to go to China. It shows her your seriousness. If you want to read about my doubts and thoughts then read http://thebesteverhappenedtome.blogspot.com/. I think your lady is just a little shy. I wish it will work out for you.
爱你的人如果没有按你所希望的方式来爱你,那并不代表他们没有全心全意地爱你。
Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

Offline Josh Markley

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #7 on: March 30, 2009, 12:31:11 am »
Quote from: "Hajo"
Josh, I know what you are going through. I had the same doubts and was almost going nuts about it. My letters used although to be very long. But it took time to compose them. I figured, my lady doesn't have a couple of hours to do that at the agency. So, her letters are bit short, too. And if it was the agency/translator playing with you, you would probably get one each day.

If have been suggested to involve the translator. I did and it seems to pay off. Just ask the translator to encourage your lady. I left a message in the body of my letter.

If I were you, I would tell her about planning to go to China. It shows her your seriousness. If you want to read about my doubts and thoughts then read http://thebesteverhappenedtome.blogspot.com/. I think your lady is just a little shy. I wish it will work out for you.
Hajo,
  Thank you for your words, I will take your advice I think I am going to ask the translator about our first phone contact at least. And I will tell her in my next letter to her about my plans to visit her. Im gonna check your blog out. Agian thanks for your words and encouragement.
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Offline David

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #8 on: March 30, 2009, 01:12:33 am »
Good advice Maxx.  You do have to step up your game... two letters a week are not that many.
Most of the ladies work long hours and are writing back to you at the end of the day so that is why I think they write shorter letters.
However if she is not answering some of your questions then re-ask them!  Good luck... I hope things work out for you two!

Offline Bob

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #9 on: March 30, 2009, 01:47:40 am »
Well, It kinda looks like a letter i once received, and I do not want to discourage you, but it looks like a letter that was written by the translator. I could be wrong, and i hope i am. Hope it all works out for you. Perhaps try to contact her directly,maybe by phone if that is possible.

Martin

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #10 on: March 30, 2009, 11:50:12 am »
I don't know if this will help in your situation, but at one time, i also found the letters getting shorter and shorter.  So one day I sent a very short letter, instead of the usual 6000 letter one.  Strangest thing happened.  The very next letter I got was big!

That's how it worked for me.  Of course, my girlfriend is very busy, so I don't expect her to write a long letter everyday.  She has a life outside of me...apparently i had a life before Chnlove...I just can't remember it.

Offline Josh Markley

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #11 on: March 30, 2009, 01:26:55 pm »
Just a little update guys, while I was chatting with Arnold, Vince, and Martin last night I figured I was being to relaxed in this whole thing and just thought maybe I had her hook, line, and sinker. Everyone here has help me realize that this is not the case. So I pressed a little last night.  I had sent her a couple of text when I had got her number. I thought what the hell i gotta do it. So I sent her another that read "My love I hope you understand me here, I miss you very much. You are my world, and I wasnt to give you my heart." In the back of my mind I didnt thin I was gonna get a reply. To my surprise at 330 am i got a text. She finally told her parents. I am stoked! I know now she will reply to my texts next is the phone call.
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Offline Hajo

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #12 on: March 30, 2009, 02:47:17 pm »
Sounds great Josh. They are more shy than one expects. I am very happy on your behalf!  :)
爱你的人如果没有按你所希望的方式来爱你,那并不代表他们没有全心全意地爱你。
Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

Offline Peter

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #13 on: March 30, 2009, 02:58:08 pm »
This is a very big step for her Josh.. Keep up the good work
Better to be married to a wife from Changsha then have 7000 women in Chnlove

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Re: What do you guys think?
« Reply #14 on: March 30, 2009, 05:10:40 pm »
What a buzz that first contact outside the agency is! Now pick it up and run with it. Best of luck my friend