When You know it is just right

[shaun]

Thanks Mike,

Eventually you do come to the point that you have to find your own way with the woman you are in love with.

[Scottish_Rob]

Shaun great read, and good insight thank you for that...When Maxx kicked my butt, I too thought he was a Bas.........never mind hahaha

The web cam and talks do bring you closer...I know this (not giving anything away YET guys )

We also tell each othe how much we love and miss each other (even though not met face to face yet).  Mike is right it builds up the relationship stronger, and both of us ARE more confidant and comfortable now too.

Glad things are going good for you both...

[maxx]

Shaun and Rob it's nice to hear that I'm so highly thought of.Don't worry your not alone.Martin, Chong, Scott,Arnold,Irishman, and a few others I'm sure feel the same way about me.If Given half a chance.I think Arnold would probably have Qing run me over with a car With Martin and Irishman cheering her on.It's alright It doesn't bother me.As long as I can help you guys get to be where you need to be.With your ladies.

I remember when I started this little journey back in March of 2006.I didn't know nothing about China.Or Chinese girls.I arrived in Zhuhai China in May of 2006.I knew one word of Chinese.And had my phrase book in my back pocket.My wife and her mother still laugh.At the Phrase book.So this little journey was a real crash course.For me.And I tripped and stumbled and fumbled my way threw this.All on my own..Yes Chnlove did have it's forum.But it was pretty useless back then.Everybody  who was posting at the time was just guessing.Or they were posting lies.

If it hadn't ben for my wife and her infinite patience with me.I would of crashed and burned.This relationship.About 2 days after I had got off the plane in China.For some reason my whit and Charm had little or no effect on my wife.So after a couple of years of me and my wife being together.I tried to fix some of the wrongs on Chnlove forum.Then Martin came along and said hey lets start are own little group..And here we are.

When you guys write your stories.I can see you guys making the same mistakes I did.So I try to jump in and help.I would hate to see anybody do this the hard way like I did.Your ladies mite not be as forgiving as my wife is.When you stick your foot in your mouth one to many times.Or you trample all over her customs and culture

good luck to all
Maxx

[David5o]

Shaun,

As i understood it, when you first enquired about the envelope money, ...It was for the ''First Meeting'' present...  I don't think you mentioned anything about Engagement at that time.

I personally still don't agree with these red envelope scenario's, especially when the lady you are intending to marry has been previously married and almost certainly has child(ren) I'm all for giving some form of present(s) and would normally be giving those each time i/we visit them anyway.  But i do however bow to whatever you have decided to do in this circumstance, ....Everybody has to deal with all these situations according to there own thoughts and circumstances....

Anyway, glad to hear everything is still going ''tickety boo'' for you!! ....haha!!

David....

[shaun]

Maxx,

Only kidding about, "The bas...?"  Your value here is huge.  You know me, I can't resist poking a little fun with anyone.  As Peggy would say, "You always joking on me."  Well I think I have managed to get her to say with me rather than on me now.

I may moan and groan but your comments and advice are always welcome here.

Rob,

Thanks.


David,

I went back and re-read all I could find about giving money to Peggy's mother.  I didn't find the actual thread I was looking for but all of the posts I did find said engagement money.

I do agree with your comments however I learned several things in the process of getting to know the family that led me to change my mind.   We all know that many of the women in China have been horribly abused by their husbands and their families.  Such is the case here and I am not at all surprised.  For me it all came to a point of needing to show her how valuable she is to me.

There is an old story about a young man who was looking for a wife.  He and his best friend went to a village to find her.  The groom found a woman who suited his fancy and talked with her family.  The best friend was there to help barter the trade for the grooms new wife.  The friend told the groom that she was only a two cow wife and the deal was struck for two cows.

The groom and his best friend moved to different parts of the country and didn't see each other for more than 30 years.  They met in their hometown to visit and catch each other up on their lives.  Both were there with their wives.  At one point the best friend ask the groom how much he paid for this new wife and the groom replied with 10 cows.  The best man said that he could see that the groom had become excellent at bartering because this woman was worth more than 10 cows.  Later the best man asked what happen to the ugly old 2 cow wife he married 30 years earlier to which the groom replied she is the same woman.

If a woman feels and finds her value from her husband is it not better to stretch out and treat her better than she thinks she is worth.  A woman who thinks this way will only grow to the highest level you set for her.  Why not set that value as high as you possibly can.  If you want a 10 cow wife you must be willing to pay 10 cows for her.

Now I am suggesting that every man on this site should have or should do this.  Each woman has different needs.  I am saying that now that I know Peggy and her family a little more that this is the right thing to do.  I now understand why she was so offended by my 1000RMB offer on April 5th.

Shaun

[RobertBfrom aust]

Shaun , so when do the 10 cows arrive and I hope you added a bull , regards Robert .

[Arnold]

I think Arnold would probably have Qing run me over with a car With Martin and Irishman cheering her on.

What do you mean " CAR " .. I would have her using a " TRUCK "

Shaun , even though I never had to deal with this Envelope situation myself .. know very well how you felt and you handled it great .

After Maxx's ( who ? ) 24 Hour Rule , the next important Rule is to have Patience and that MUST go both way's . Thinking back to my first Face to Face ( Trip ) Qing was 20 minutes late . If it wasn't for the Patience we learned from the six month's of writing and waiting , I think .. I would have thought ... Oh oh ! Can this be ? I've been had !! Now .. if it was going to be a couple Hours ? Who knows ??

[David5o]

Shaun,

Yes your right, My mistake. There was only one post where ''first meeting gift'' was mentioned, and that's the one i seemed to have remembered ...Typical!!!! ...haha!!!!!
But boy was it hard to find with all those posts about bloody eggs, ...They seemed to go on forever...Hahaha!!!

David....