When To Discuss China or West?

[JimB]

You will regret it if you marry someone who does not willingly go with you.  I hated living in Florida, I would not move there.  It affected my ex wife in everything we did.  It festered in her to the point that each year it caused a great big fight between us finally helping to cause our divorce.
Of course it is natural for her to have reservations about leaving her country and family. If she has potential carry on a little longer and see where it goes.  If not then cut her loose now.  No sense in wasting time and money.  My wife definitely wanted to move anywhere in the world I wanted to go.  She would be happy to live in China but just as happy to live in the US as long as she is able to visit her family.  That is all she asked of me.  You cannot ask anything more of a partner.  i struck gold with her.  But, as was said, you cant make these life changing decisions in 2.5 weeks.  Just continue to be upfront, if you feel that strong about it, then do NOT waffle on it just to keep her happy.  Dont give her any reason to think you may change your mind.  You will be miserable in the long run if you do.

[Hans]

Rocky, I think you may have a slightly romanticized image of Sweden! Haha. Sweden is great in many aspects but it's not all goody gumdrops.

It's one thing to like ones country. But when to decide where to live there is more to it than that. Personally I don't have many friends left here, several have moved abroad and others have decided to stay in their home villages where we grew up. Since my family was reduced to half after an accident, I've felt an even stronger urge to move away. And as it happens, I like Asian women!

So for me there might be an escape tendency to it as well. I'm looking for a place where the bad memories do not occur. But China is special, I experienced it the first time. I thought it was just because I was away from home and that I needed to get away. But every time I arrive in China, it's the same feeling. The feeling of "coming home". It's really strange. Thailand is great but I never get the same feeling there. Or anywhere else. I'm still in my late 20's, if I move to China in a few years and don't like it, I guess I can move back again and start over.

Peter, the 6 months-6 months plan seems perfect! I wish you good luck with that, to experience the Swedish summer and not the winter must be amazing. The get the best from two worlds. :-)