Letter to Chnlove

[victor-hills]

I have to say its really poor all it was down to lack of hair geez come on,what the hell has that got to do with anything,i read meny profiles and a good part of them say its the inner beauty you know the person them self is more inportent but dont seem that way.Alex when you sort your self a wig m8 give me a shout were you got it from becase im a bit thin on top too lol.

[Irishman]

The lack of hair thing is weird but I have heard other surprising things.
Ling , an intelligent girl who works as an accountant once asked me if it was true that in my country that most men have many women as wives?!! One of her colleagues on work told her this and she wondered if it might be true!!

Another time when we were watching a show I was taking pictures like everyone else of the performance but the Chinese girl beside me was clearly afraid i was going to rob her or worse, she kept looking at me and gripping her handbag tight, if I so much moved an inch in her direction she jumped..this despite the fact that I was obviously with with Ling!!

People have funny ideas no matter where you are , and in cultures so different that can easily get magnified to huge proportions. The hair thing, bizarre as it seems, may have a grain of truth in it, but probably only a grain.

[Philip]

Hi Ronan,
the hair thing amuses me only because it shows the lengths this agency has gone to justify their underhand actions. There are so many contradictions to their story that it can't be true. More importantly I have the feeling I had when I was there, which I knew was dodgy and fishy. In theory my lack of hair could have been offensive and my (hopefully) future children may suffer from such an affliction, but a scam is a scam.
I would like to draw a line under this experience, because the overriding feeling I had from my trip to Changsha was so positive afterwards. I am in love with China now and who knows whether it would have happened like that if I hadn't started so traumatically. It was probably the best holiday of my life, because it was just a catalogue of unpredictable and unexpected joys and emotions. My bruised heart opened up to Changsha and its people and their exceptional kindness and humour unlocked parts of me I didn't know existed.
There's no point flogging the dead horse of pursuing the agency, they aren't worth my energy, so I will look forward to the time when I am with my true soulmate, who will be a lady in China.
Alex

[Norb Smith]

Hey Alex met an interesting lady from your favorite agency, but she tells me she wasnt one of the ones that hauled you to the KTV...........lol

[Irishman]

Alex, I read your posts from over there with huge admiration, you got a low blow but you took it like a man and ended up coming out the other side. I know a little how that feels like, we can either dwell in the past or move on and appreciate what we have, as you say , no point in flogging a dead horse!

I'm still hooked on China and will be returning there, maybe next time my whole trip over there story will be a happy one. Whatever happens I know the brothers here will be a shoulder to cry on or a hand to shake when things go well.

[Scottish_Rob]

Alex my signature tells you what I think of you.....

[Vince G]

I guess this is the best place to put this? I put a suggestion in on Chnlove.com In the Site suggestion topic. Giving the suggestion that there should be indicator, (an indicator on the woman's profile that she is taken? involved, spoken for, in the process?) Thing is, it showed up alright? In "Today's Chinese Women" instead of "Site Suggestions"? Strange?

[Tiztom]

Hey Alex, you had me crapping my pants for a minute there, I'm also talking to a girl from Changsha so I hurriedly found her profile to see which agency she was from...........Phew P218, I wrote a huge letter last night (only my second as we talk via email too) and received a great response late this afternoon.
Hope it turns out good for you.
I'm also a bit of a baldy so I may ask the question sooner than later though she has a few photo's of me so I'm not hiding anything.
Luckily we are on exactly the same time frame as China, no 12hr gap.

[shaun]

Well, guys after reading everything that has been written over the last few weeks it has become increasingly more difficult to trust even chnlove.  If they were truly on OUR side they would fix the problem but all I see is Obama type posturing.  I've been trying to write the one person I am interested in at P218 in Changsha but I have so many reservations now.  Let's be honest.  If you see people being ripped off by agencies over and over and over again and the group that aids you in going to the local agencies will not hold the local agencies accountable, then why should I throw good money in to a pit that, in all likelihood, will prove to take my money and not produce very much.  The kicker is that to find out that I am being ripped of is that I have to spend a couple of thousand dollars to go there and find out.  That just isn't in me.

The real problem for me is that I really do not want another American wife.  I have met a lot of Asian women over the years.  It is much more than their beauty that attracts me, their charm, care, femininity, and common sense appeals to me also.  I am looking at CB right now because I can look at Asian women here in the US that are looking for men.

I don't know but I have a problem spending any more money with chnlove and I have 28 credits left.

Shaun

[Martin]

and the group that aids you in going to the local agencies will not hold the local agencies accountable, then why should I throw good money in to a pit that,

This is a fair argument, and not one that I see an answer to.  I also would like to see chnlove do something about these agencies.

If you find your lady elsewhere, please keep us posted here, because there may be others that want to follow in your footsteps.  Any information is good information.

[Philip]

Shaun and Tom,
I am as sure as I can be that the P218 agency is a good one. I have been there and am in regular QQ contact with some of the translators. I am also writing to a fantastic lady there. Just hold on to the fact that this agency is good and you will be fine - you can focus on your relationship.
I had every reason to be suspicious after my experience with the other agency, and Chnlove haven't been at all effective in dealing with them.  They just swallow everything the agency tells them. But don't be put off. Hold on to your trust. And read the posts on this site. If Chnlove doesn't help us, we have to do it.

take care
Alex

I don't know but I have a problem spending any more money with chnlove and I have 28 credits left.

Shaun

[shaun]

Alex,  

I am relatively sure that things might be OK at P218.  I have not seen anything to the contrary.  But because there are so many other agencies that we need to be careful of it causes doubt with the one you are with.  It is kind of like taking a bite of an apple.  If that first bite is bad experience tells me that the rest of the apple is bad.  When we can hear about one bad agency and the emotional trauma the man goes through when he arrives in China only to find out he has been lied to and all chnlove does is to give him a few credits back and nothing to the offending agency then it makes me wonder if all of the agencies are bad.

They really do not understand about messing with a western mans emotions.  I would hate for one man to get there and him go postal on them.

For me I find myself checking out my girl daily to see.  I look everyday to see if she is refreshing her profile.  I re-read her letters looking for inconsistencies mainly to see if the agent is writing them.  Unfortunately I do not like what I am doing and do not feel is is good for me to begin to distrust her but the bad agencies have created an atmosphere like that.  One thing is for sure is this it is not healthy for establishing a good relationship.  

This site is doing a good thing by uniting us and becoming a force to be reckoned with as far as chnlove is concerned.  One of my questions is does chnlove understand that?  Will they do something significant about it? Or will they do what they have done so far which is to synmpaththise with you, tell you they understand, but there is really nothing they can or will do to the offending agency?

I mean really; is there any good reason why P216 is still a part of chnlove at this point?  If I get a new admirer and I see they are from that agency I am done at that point.  There is no point and it makes me wonder about P218 even though they have not given me any cause to suspect them.

Going over there and finding out would resolve a lot of issues but I cannot right now.  But at the same time who wants to take the chance of throwing $3000.00 out the window?

Shaun

Nope, my mood hasn't changed yet, guess I'll go back to sleep.  Maybe this will all pass.

[RobertBfrom aust]

Shaun ,P218 is okay , I have been there , Peter has been there and Alex has also now been there , and have no complaints , find out who your translator is and also write short notes to them at the bottom of your emf's , send over photo's of you in normal life and ask for some in return [ when she next has one taken with her girlfriends or ? ] also set up a video cam session , again when it suits all parties , then you know she is real ,do not worry about profile refresh as agencies do this automatically with no lady input and generally will not hide profiles until lady is hooked , ring on finger , regards Robert .

[Darius]

Shaun,

i see where are you coming from. I have gone through that. You are lucky. My lady is from one of the worst rated agencies related to chnlove. It took me about 3 months to have finally my first web meeting and her phone number.
But eventually the shady practice of the agencies have nothing to do with your lady. Yes it is true, they wont lose any oppurtunity to make some bucks more from you if they can. But trust your lady as long as she is trustworthy, and try to find a way to her. Dont rack your brain about refreshing of her profile.I asked my lady straight in our first web meeting and i saw her face while translating. She didnt even know about that. Sometimes you got to play their plays till you have your direct contact with her. From that moment you will see all will be different. As Arnold said somewhere in the forum dont go over if you are not sure at least 95% this thing will work out for you. The direct contact will be a must, if you dont like unpleasent surprise or afford it.
But if you love china and the culture dont give up. You will find someday your better half and you will see all that was more than worthy.
Maxx, Martin, Ed among others are the living proofs of that.

[Tiztom]

from...........Phew P218,
Sorry you misunderstood but I meant/implied was "thank christ" not P216 ............Great P218, I don't have a problem with them.