Hahaha!!, ....I've just been having a little chuckle to myself here reading what your saying about these Chinese women, and how they can have you and your life organised in short order!!...lol!!
Get used to it lads, because it doesn't stop, anything to do with family, home, health, etc etc, is going to come under her control, ...like it or not!! lol!! They will rarely ask you about anything, they just go right ahead and do it, you will only be told/informed as a late after thought...
Just wait till you come home from work one night, you have a quick shower and change in to your lounging around the home gear. You just get yourself settled in your favorite chair and start relaxing for the night, when out of the blue your Chinese wife tells you ...Oh!! so and so is coming round tonight for dinner, ...or Oh!! were going out tonight, to so and so's for dinner!!!
Now this evening had been planned by her for maybe day's or even weeks, but you only find out maybe half an hour to an hour before..... It took me around 2 years to get her out of that habit, so now i get to find out maybe the day before the event, ...i can live with that ..lol!!!
I've found it easier to ask her, (normally of a morning) what's planned or going on for her today, you'll be amazed what you'll find out by doing this sort of thing!! ...hahaha!!
Best of luck to all of you, i think you've all got lot's to learn, especially after your married and living together full time. ....Just ask Maxx, Ted, and some of the others. It's only after your married (living together) that your relationship really starts. One thing for sure, it's gonna be nothing like your visits to China to be with your wife, ...There holidays!!!... hahaha!!
David......