Brett...it's all about the journey! Never stop growing and learning with her!
Well this is the best nugget out of this thread - thanks fivetrout!
I might have dated 25+ women, but in the majority of cases it's just been a quick initial meeting for dinner. If I was doing the whole remote bride finding thing then I'd chat to them more on QQ first, maybe do a Skype session, then only meet the best of the best. But I can't be bothered with internet chatting so much now, I'd much rather meet somebody in person. And all I have to do for that is get on a bus. It's great being here.
The good thing about doing so much dating is that I've narrowed down so many things, like age range, height, English ability etc. etc. A few ladies haven't wanted to see me again. For me this is a great sign that I've set my sights high enough.
Anyway, to answer my critics... yes I live in a basic apartment here but UK Brett has a nice nest egg. The reason I haven't bought any stuff is that I might decide to move to another city, province or country, or maybe I'll have visa problems and have to leave. And actually, stuff just gets wrecked, falls apart or rots away so quickly here so it's just a big waste of money. If I do get married then what stuff we have is up to my wife, I have no interest in consumer culture. And where we lived would be up to the lady. I'd never use my UK money to buy property here anyway. No way on earth.
Actually I did look at some plusher rental apartments, but with property location is EVERYTHING and this place is 2 minutes from my classroom. But if you think my place is bad, you'd be tremendously shocked at some of the other places I looked at!!!
Incidentally, don't get into thinking it's cheap here - it's NOT! I could write a whole book about stuff that's more expensive in China compared to home. Inflation is raging here. 2 bedroom apartments are 4000RMB here now - that's not much less than in the UK. And more mundanely I bought 2 red onions today, and they cost more than they would in England.
I must admit that I might be changing my mind a bit about marriage since I've been here. Yesterday I learned something disturbing about one of the ladies I met (no, not the Woo!). Single men give up a lot when they get married. Plus many Chinese ladies come with a lot of baggage. Sick relatives are very common - all that work, work, work here can result in a big price to pay here later in life.
Well anyway, this journey so far has been tremendous fun. There is simply no comparison between visiting China on vacations, and actually living here. All that dating has been against a backdrop of battling to keep my apartment clean, trying to find food worth eating, learning how to take buses, traveling to other cities, trying to secure a visa, the horrors of sending money from the UK, absolutely crazy weather, getting my phone working, doing a bit of English teaching, keeping my UK career going, getting worryingly sick a few times, coping with horrendous overcrowding, meeting a few expats, dealing with mosquito nightmares, plus my daily Chinese classes.
Today's experiences have been (i) catching a massive cockroach and (ii) the epic adventure of trying to get from the bus stop back to my apartment in a raging thunderstorm. Wading through an inch or more of water has never been such fun! And I'd like to thank the mystery Chinese guy who showed me that when 大暴雨 strikes, the safest place is to stand on the bus station seat!!! Willy should just leave his car in his garage rather than risk driving in that. The bus driver couldn't even find our bus stop!
Well anyway, ladies-wise, there are several on the go right now, but a frontrunner is yet to emerge. The quality of lady I've met here is just so staggeringly high it's incredible.