I'm with Mike O on this one. Take evening classes, day classes or whatever suits your situation best. The best way in my opinion is to learn to speak and write at the same time. We have people in my class who have Chinese parents and still they come to the evening class because they want to know more about the grammar and the characters. I've had a classmate who speaks daily to her cat just to be able to speak some Chinese.
I've only studied for a bit over a year but it gets easier after the first 500 characters or so (although I would not mind if all the measure words were place with a simple ??:-). Just give it time! :exclamation:
I'm using the Contemporary Chinese (Dangdai Zhongwen,
?) books and I think they're pretty good (although I have not studied any other language at the university so I have nothing to compare with). The first two volumes includes a text book, a character book (showing all the strokes in the correct order) and CDs. From the third volume we're supposed to know the stroke order. What is good about it is the difficulty level, which rises slowly and deliberately.
http://www.chinesemall.com/cochvoone.html