Hi there, brothers.
I got one or a few questions in fact, because those last days, Liyan and me are talking more and more about future, and sometimes, I know I can worry and be a little bit "upset" about few things.
Liyan told me that she wanted to have a house in fact, just for her, in China, because she always wanted to have one...
But we talked before about having one in France, buying one together, in fact. Man can easily understand that =====> are we rich? Of course not... we're more poor than rich, for sure... (haha)
but well. She told me "your car, your studio, it belongs to you before and after the marriage, it will always be all yours". I said that for my car, yes, and about my studio, well, my parents bought it, it belongs to them, but they donate it to me, but well, for sure, it is "always" theirs. But that I was very happy to begin my new life with her in the studio, before thinking about a house. And that means, saving money, both.
But Liyan told me that she wanted to buy a house before getting married... :s so that, if one day, she doesn't want to show me anymore, then, she would go there.... (ok, as we were on QQ, I became disapointed for a while)...
as I said to her that if everything would be Ok, we could be married for July, how would she do to buy a house in China, where would she got the money, and if she could buy a house, would that mean that she would marry me, and each month, she "SHOULD" save some money, only for "her" and not for us? why marrying so if she wants to have only HER house and not a common house?
I tried to explain her that yes, having a house in China is quite nice, ok. But as we will live in France, first, that would be better to begin here, saving money together for the house in France, and not her, saving money only for her, and me, saving money for both.
I tried to explain her too, that, without job, that would be very hard to save some money.. In fact, I told her, "how would you do if I had bought myself something very expensive before marrying you, and then, when we live together, each month, I need save money, but I have no job?" and then she found the answer..."if one day we have nothing to eat and that you still save money for you, then I leave you because you are a very bad guy...."
it was a bit "harsh" and bad, because... to me, if someones buys something before wedding, very expensive, and needs to save money while being married, just for his own person (just understand, it is only personal, just for you, nobody else), then, how would man say, that this is also LOVE to be shared when being married, related to that??
To me, and I think I maybe am "right", if man loves someone, he would share many things with the other one, and not say "this is mine, this is yours, you save money for you, i save money for me"... that is very very bad... where is the project, in that sentence, to say than man wants to say "I want to live and to share WITH you"?
I also asked Liyan "if you had that house, now, in China, would you even let me live with you there, or would you say "I never want to see you in the house"... ==> of course she gave the righteous answer, and she realized that yes, thinking about having her own house in China is "very difficult", as she is getting married.. and it seems that it is "worrying" her... but well.. as I told her, we could buy one later in China, when we would go there in maybe 15 years... I know that many things can occur, but well... that's just an idea. And yes, if she had one house in China, if she should give some money each month, while living in France, with no job for a while... how would things go, then? And if she could find some job, later, and that we could buy a house, would she really save money for OUR house and HER house?
Anyway, if my studio is "mine", I am very happy to think that Liyan can live with me everyday, I am very happy to think that I can share it with her", but thinking about money, sometimes, just makes me "thinking" that there are some persons who feel like "personal" before thinking for 2...
Did or does some of your Girlfriends/fiancees/wives talk to you about that before or recently? and what do you think about that?
