Greetings Brothers,
Thanks for the kind words. Nice to know I was missed.
Lain, glad to help so no problems there. As others have said before me living in china is not for everyone. It definitely takes a certain mindset to make it work and depending on your commitments back home you just may not be able to do it. I learned a lot of my lessons from the brothers like JimB, Rhonald, David5O etc. who were more than willing to share the joys and the pains of this endeavour. I am truly glad I found this site before I ever went to china. I can honestly say their advice with Maxx and Chong and Arnold, Shaun, Rob,Neil, etc really gave me the courage and the knowledge I needed to do what I did.
That truly is the strength of the brotherhood. Good solid advice, and a kick in the pants when needed. Where else can you go and talk with people who know exactly what you are going through in this journey and not only sympathize but help you through the difficulties from personal experience.
As for the actual living in china stuff you will find it vastly different than the west with many strange things to see. For instance mostly its the men who smoke here not the ladies. However they smoke everywhere. In elevators in restaurants on buses in taxis etc. Everywhere you go except perhaps the shops you will see men smoking. If its difficult for you to tolerate smoke then that will become a big issue very fast.
The noise here is also quite out of hand. The drivers use their horns to communicate not just because you are in the way but for most other things as well. As I type this in my apartment I can here horns blaring for blocks away. I am a very light sleeper so for me this is the most difficult thing I have to deal with. The noise never stops.
You will also see many people hawking and spitting all over the place, men and women both. Supposedly the government has said that it is not allowed but how do you stop 1.3 billion people doing something they have been doing for years.
Shopping. Well this is something that everyone who visits China should see first hand. I dont mean going to the local shopping centre and picking up some designer clothing. I mean going to the street markets and mingling with the locals buying your fruit and vegetables directly from the farmer who grew it.Their ideas of cleanliness and sanitation are just a wee bit different than the west and yes I say that tongue in cheek. You will see things here in China that you can never see in western countries.
Some of the most popular restaurants in China are small dirty looking places where they cook the food right on the street. No sanitation to speak of and no hot water for washing with either. However that said the chinese love these places becasue the prices are low and I for one have not seen many sick chinese people. Now to be honest I have never eaten anything from such places but the folks I work with do and they dont get sick. Its also neat to see in the supermarkets hundreds of people at once shopping for food. When was the last time you were in a supermarket to buy food with several hundred other shoppers? Also they dont go in for packaging their food here. When you go to buy meat for instance it is usally cut into pieces and put on a table or in the coolers They are all open to the air and everyone picks up and drops the pieces of meat as they search for the one they want to buy. No styrofoam shrink wrapped packing here.
So many things like this will certainly give you a certain culture shock when you see it. All the fancy health rules we have in the west about cleanliness and packaging and seperating beef from chicken from fish to avoid cross contamination are not so noticable here. Do not take all this the wrong way I am not knocking their culture or the way they do things at all. I am saying you will find things much different here than in your home country. Many tourists who come to china and do the tours and stay in hotels and eat in nice restaurants never see this kind of thing. Living with chinese people the way they live is the best way to discover the real china.
I have learned so much living here that most westerners have never seen or done and it truly has been a grand experience for me. Most of the people I see are happy or at least content, hard working folks trying to make a living and keep their family going just like those in the west. There definitely seems to be much less unhappiness and misery here even though the people are generally not as well off as westerners. They seem to have a remarkable ability to accept life as it is and make the best of it. They work crazy long hours with usually only one day off a week and much lower pay than minimum wage in the west. Yet most of the people I have seen are smiling and cheerful and always willing to help if they can.
So anyone thinking of moving to live in china definitely be prepared for many rather large changes in how you view the world. Most things here are different from the west, and as David 5o often says money into the right hands can make many things go smoother. Socal networking and who you know are definitely more than buzz words here, they are how many things get done.
So after everything I have written am I truly happy here in china? Yes I am. I have the love of my life at my side, I earn more than the average chinese person with much less work and grief. My money buys so much more here than in Canada. So much so that barring a huge change of mind on both Zhens and my part I will move my money here and buy a house and retire to spend the rest of my life here. As Willy and Ted have said before, there is no life like it. I am enjoying it so much I have even forgettten what the word stress means. The most stressful thing I have to figure out is what to have for lunch and how long of a walk will we take today. Ok thats a little bit exaggerated but only a little. I had slightly high blood pressure and cholesterol before I came here, but I am willing to bet money that its all fine now. Life is just so much easier for us Lao Wei here in China and I for one am loving it.
So if you are contemplating life in china for longer than a tourist visa will allow be prepared for many different changes in your life. Without your lady at your side things will be quite difficult until you learn how things work. If you are lucky like me and have her with you then you will quite likely never look at a western woman in the same way again. Life with a chinese lady is everything a marriage should be from my personal experience. Mutual respect mutual love and the husband doing what he is told.... er I mean discussing everyhting together. she will totally take charge of the house and everything in it including you. You will be pampered and loved and cared for like you have never been. Ahh but what is the catch you say? What does she demand in return? Well from what I have seen something most difficult to do. You must be the head of the family. You make the money and all the non house related decisions. she will follow your lead in all things and be quite happy in doing so. She will demand respect and love and romance perhaps and also affection and give all back in at least equal measure.
I personally have never been so happy in all my 50 plus years on this earth and my biggest hope is I can live for a damned long time more in her tender loving arms.
So take care Brothers and may you all be as happy as Zhen and I are now.
Zhen and Brian
