CHINA VISITS

[Pineau]

Rob,
Right on! A three hour drive in China. That is dedication. Good luck man!

[Pineau]

Could it be that I am being too picky? Maybe miss perfect match does not exist. And if she did would she even take a second glance at me.  ( I have a beard and I am about 30 pounds over ideal). And if she meets or exceeds my criteria she is probably already in one or more on-line relationships.

I get a lot of hits on CLM and CLL (I a lot) a few come back for a second glance and maybe 10% come back more than 5-10 times (those are the ones i focus on). You think they are turned off by the beard?  Anyone know what Chinese women think about facial hair? So far the ones that like me say they like me with or with the beard. Some suggest that I would look younger without it. But have asked me to shave it. I have had it for 7 years and I can remember what I looked like without it. Maybe I should shave before I leave on my trip?


Man, I know she is out there and I sure would like to bring her home. Perseverance and patience...

[Arnold]

Shaving the Beard is a big plus with MOST Ladies there . Look at Martin , shaving it all gained him a beautiful Wife . There are exceptions , but why lenghten your search with something you have control over ? Pineau , take two photo's and we'll give you a God's honest answer which looks better .

[Pineau]

I don't think this is a fair comparison because the one without the beard is 11 years old. I don't have any recent pictures without it.

[RobertBfrom aust]

Sujuan was looking at your 2 photo's , and said to me very few ladies would like beard photo , she also said you can always grow it back if lady wants to see you with it [ now that is a thought ] . I do not know what age group you are looking at , but 9 out of every 10 in the 35 and over group will have been married and most will have a child , my other half is 38 and her daughter who is here with us is 16 and an angel , good luck with your quest , regards Sujuan and Robert .

[Arnold]

Well , I say .. the one without looks much younger of course (11 yrs.ago ) . But if you shaved now it will of course make you younger anyway you look at it . I was also under the impression of a full beard . This is not bad at all , but NO is still better for most chinese Lady's and most here can agree with me here .

[maxx]

Ok Pineau I've read the entire thread twice now.So tell me what Am I missing here?You searched threw all these different ladies.You can't find the one you think suites you.So now your discouraged.Granted we are talking a life long commitment here.So One should choose very carefully.

My Question to you is what is the problem? I don't think it is the beard thing.I think your getting twisted up inside your own head.And over thinking this thing.Get out of your head.Get out of trying to think what the woman thinks.And let it go.Flow with it move with it.You are trying to determine how this will turn out.From a few pictures.And some letters.Not a good plan.I see you are going to China.So that is a plus.You are on the right track.

I know it sounds like I'm a asshole.I am I freely acknowledge That.So it isn't a big secrete.My point is get outside of your head.Stack the deck in your favor.Go to Willy and Ted's dating site.Pick a woman.Talk to Ted and Willy about your choice.Ted and Willy Know all the girls pretty good.Thiere are the ones who took the pictures.And interviewed the girls.So by doing this you are taking the guess work out of this.I bet they can set you up.With a nice lady.That fulfills all your requirements.

Thiere web site is www.chinaloveagency.com.So give it a try.And then let us know how it all works out.To the rest of the members here who are having the same problem as Pineau.You all have this tool at your disposal.So my question is why not give it a try.What do you have to lose.You have direct contact.With the head of the agency.If thiere is a problem.Ore your not sure about.one of thiere ladies.I'm sure Ted or Willy can look into it.And get it all sorted out.

[Willy The Londoner]

This was supposed to be so simple. Find some, meet some, choose one and I’m done! Right?  I need a new plan. .

Willy, So I will make my to way to Guangzhou and thought I would stop and say hello and take you to lunch.

Just one flaw in your planning. I will be in the UK with my wife fo a holiday from 10th - 22nd of September.  I am then planning to travel to Guangzhou on Thursday 23rd ready for the Irishmans nuptuals on Friday 24th.  If your around GZ at that time come and join the celebrations.  You may even be in time to see an almost  naked Irishman chained to a lamp post in Guangzhou main street maybe wearing possibly a Flowery shirt, after imbiding to much Chinese liquer on his stag night.   An Irish stag night no less. 

Willy

[Jason B]

I have a beard and I am about 30 pounds over ideal.

Anyone know what Chinese women think about facial hair?

Mate I can tell you from my experience with Xia that she did not like the goatee I had when I met her.  She asked me to shave it off, but only if I wanted to.  But of course that meant no kissing etc.  So the next morning a razor appeared and now I have no more goatee.  It does make me appear younger and this was the whole reason behind it.

Also do not be surprised if your lady asks you to loose weight too.  I am a little overweight myself and Xia asked me to loose some weight.  Do not take this to heart it is the lady just trying to make you take better care of yourself and be more healthy.  This is very important in Chinese culture and not a bad thing anyway.

Just my thoughts and what I have been told to do by Xia (no I am not under the thumb).

[Pineau]

Thanks, there are some really good thoughts and ideas here

As for youth and good looks. What can I say? Jing spoiled me. After ten years of looking at a face and body that is 20 years younger than you deserve, you get spoiled. I know it makes me look shallow and I probably am, but I am trying to make a correction and I am committed to finding someone older and more mature than her.

As for kids at home. It probably looks like on the surface that I don’t like kids. But that is wrong. I have raised 5 of my own and 2 step children. They are all grown and doing fine and I am proud of the job I have done. But I am nearly 60 years old. What are the chances of me raising a youngster to maturity and sending them off into the world? I would even consider giving a woman another child if I thought there was any chance I would live long enough to see it start college. Maybe if the child were a bit older there would be more wiggle room but some of the women in there  40s have pre-teen children at home. This would be a tough decision for me. I would rather just spoil our grandkids.

 Maxx, maybe you are right. Maybe I am over thinking this but I am scared sh**less. I would love to let go and just let it "happen" but that didn't work out so well the last time. I am not getting any younger and I don't have a lot of room for another horrible mistake. I want this to be the only time I go through this process. That is why I am being so cautious. But your point is taken. I'm probably being selfish too and expecting too much. I should spend some time at Ted and Willy’s site and find a good quality lady and see if it works out. I could make any relationship work if I try hard enough. I just don’t want to be taken for another ride.

mpo4747,  If they are your wife’s friends and come with her recommendation they must be worth looking at. Can you PM me with more information.

Meanwhile I am going to go look some more at  Ted and Willy’s. (that sounds like a good name for a pub or a fish-n-chips)

I do know, I’m still thinking about shaving.

Thanks guys

[Martin]

As for kids at home. It probably looks like on the surface that I don’t like kids. But that is wrong. I have raised 5 of my own and 2 step children. They are all grown and doing fine and I am proud of the job I have done. But I am nearly 60 years old. What are the chances of me raising a youngster to maturity and sending them off into the world? I would even consider giving a woman another child if I thought there was any chance I would live long enough to see it start college. Maybe if the child were a bit older there would be more wiggle room but some of the women in there  40s have pre-teen children at home. This would be a tough decision for me. I would rather just spoil our grandkids.

I don't think it looks like you don't want kids.  I think it looks like you know what you want.  I don't think you need to apologize, or give reasons for why you do, or do not want children.  Its all a preference thing, and there is nothing wrong with that.

[Pineau]

Guys, you wont believe this but with 16 days left before I fly off to Beijing I decide to follow some advice here and I shave off my beard. I posted the new photo two days ago on all three matchmaking sites. For the past two days I have had 3 times the messages and smiles and kisses as before.  In my eyes the missing beard really shows my age and I think I look better with it. But it sure makes a difference with Chinese ladies of all ages. I am surprised.

Before  I was having trouble maintaining a list of potential " meetings". Now my cup is overflowing and I am having trouble deciding where and when and how long stay. Its nice !

I still plan to get to Guangzhou and meet with Willy if he has time. I need to learn how to blog so I can keep track of my trip on-line.

Gerry

[RobertBfrom aust]

Ha , Sujuan told you so , now she would like to see the difference , but watch out probably lining up her sister for you ha ha , regards Robert and Sujuan .

[ttwjr32]

Willy is in zhongshan so dont make the old man come all the way to guangzhou he always falls
asleep on the bus and ends up in Guilin

[Pineau]

OK.  but I think it really makes me look older.  But it seems to be working. My mailbox had several letters from ladies I had expressed an intrest in last month. They have been ignoring me for weeks but now they are suddenly interested.

I am going to take my laptop with me and rather than rely on hotel hotspots I found a company in Shanghai that will hook you up with broadband wireless that is good all over China. They will rent you the hardware ( a small USB dongle, looks like a flash drive) Deliver it to the hotel of your choice.  They will either pick it up when you leave or you can post it back to them when you are finished with it. Which is great for me because I will be arriving in Beijing but departing from God knows where.  The service comes prepaid. Just plug it in, follow the prompts and in a few minutes you are on-line. They will also deliver a prepaid SIM card for your (unlocked) 3G phone so you have a telephone the first day. Sounds like a great service but I will reserve judgment until I have tried it myself. The company is @3GSolutions www.3gsolutions.com.cn They have some other gadgets for travelers. They were very helpful in answering questions and recommend the right stuff for what I needed. And they take paypal.

I will probably make it to Guangzhou on the 24th. I hope he is back then.