Yes, this is exactly what I meant.
And thanks for making a notice of word "investing".
I remember a book on marketing psychology - how salesmen use different tricks to force buyers to make a deal.
There was an interesting thought - don't remember the exact quote, but the meaning was, that fools are very consequent in their foolishness. That is, once they stepped on the wrong path - they continue going that path (even if there are many signals that they are wrong).
How is it related to the previous topic? Well... maybe for face things, of for some other reasons - but once we begin to do something, and once we invested some critical amount of efforts --> we are not going to stop even if at some point realize that we are wrong (and we will "successfully" head to a logical, but not-happy-ending).
Because so many efforts are spent on online communication, paperwork, everybody around is somehow involved (including family, friends,colleagues). Too difficult to cut everything.
I really don't know how it works with Chinese ladies in US or Europe, but in Israel (where I live with my boyfriend) - they have a so-called girlfriend/boyfriend visa which can be extended again and again. It gives work permit, medical insurance and virtually any rights except citizenship. I think it is very wise - since people can test waters before tying the knot. And it reduces a lot of pressure when people make decisions.
Thankfully it has nothing to do with my relationship, which is very happy