All About China > Understanding Chinese Women

Not sure what to make of this...

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ttwjr32:
my opinoin this is a lady who knows what is important to her and right now that
is to finish her studies. visiting her will not change that. very smart woman in thinking at
her young age what exactly she wants. offer to keep in touch with her at certain times and
take an interest in how she is doing support her in her studies and be there for her for any issues
she might want to discuss. THAT is how you will strenthen this relationship. one member here stated
she is not confident in this relationship  quite contrary she is a very confident and determined lady and
she knows what she wants. give her a little space and keep in contact with her even if its not as often
as you want the end result might amaze you but for sure dont push her into something. she is not some
young lady looking for a way out or trying to settle she has goals and you must admire that. hang in there
because you have found one with her head in the right place who thinks leaving China is the answer

Axiom:
Thanks so much for the advice ttwjr32

You really hit her personality on the head! In fact one of the reasons I was so attracted to her is she has strong convictions and knows what she wants.

This is the card I got just a few days ago with the chocolate she sent...

"Dearest Dave, I love you more than you can imagine!!!
May your life be full of sunshine and smile(s) everyday!!! --Ting"


I really dont want to lose her since I never had a deep of connection with anyone before.. but I guess that old adage is true: If you love something set it free, If it doesn't return.. it was never yours... well, i think thats close anyway :P But the way you worded it... makes the most sence to me. She is not the kind of woman who you hold onto to tightly... she (like myself) is a free spirit and giving her space seems logical.

Double thanks again for everyones insight on the matter! :icon_cheesygrin:

ttwjr32:
that space will very well turn into a wonderful life together looks like or sounds like she
loves you but wants to finish what goals she has and there is nothing wrong with that

KEEP IN TOUCH and the end results will turn out right. she is not looking to be dependant
on someone she wants to be a contributor in the relationship. nothing wrong with that
but a lot of people (guys) dont get that.and on my previous post it was a typo error she THINKS that leaving CHINA
is NOT the answer she wants to be ready and able to contribute and survive
in her relationship and if that means LIVING in CHINA then she will be ready for that

Arnold:

--- Quote from: 'ttwjr32' pid='38634' dateline='1273767423' ---KEEP IN TOUCH and the end results will turn out right. she is not looking to be dependant on someone she wants to be a contributor in the relationship. nothing wrong with that but a lot of people (guys) dont get that.
--- End quote ---


Ted , you discribed my Wife also . As she is now dependent on me , it is eating away at her NOT having a Job to contribute to our Relationship as of yet . All the other things around the House she does , don't mean a thing to her .. it's NOT work as she says . As westerners must realize this quality in these Women as a big positive NOT a negative . Western Women should take note !

odysseus007:
Ok, I admit that with the extra info given, it does not seem like a Dear John, so if you have survived 18 months without real face-to-face contact or remote visual contact, then probably the 2 of you are very much different from most folks who need the extra security of that closer contact. And another 12 months without any contact may be tolerable. I know I could not stand it, but I am not you.

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