The Cream of Scams

[Willy The Londoner]

Met up with the police officer who deals with my Temporary Residents Permit every time I renew my visa.

She tells me that two women were arrested who had been in contact with foreign men and even met them in China and have given each other a couple of weeks of pleasure.

The men had been quite happy to send the women  money every month after having met, wined, dined, and bedded them and thinking that one day they would be married.   The only problem is that these women were dealing with about 20 men a year each that they met on the internet and through online agencies.

Small sums of money between 100 and 300 us dollars a month was being received.  Plus 'bonus' for emergency occasions.  Small amounts but soon build up. It is estimated  they were earning between 500,000 and a million RMB a year and had not expenditure hardly as almost every day they had someone taking them to meals and buying them gifts.  Why is why they both have big houses,

They even had programmes set up so they knew who was going to be calling at what time etc.  They worked at it as a full time business.

So it seems it does not matter if you meet the women or not you are still at risk.

And they worked all over China.  If a 'boyfriend" thought the woman  was in Beijing, or Shanghai, or Guangzhou  they would meet him at the airport there.
They booked the hotels and the men paid.

They would keep the men as long as possible until marriage was almost about to happen then blow the men out.  It is not known if this was before or after the man had sent the payment for wedding celebrations.

So all you sages who say make sure you have contact outside of agencies then just how much contact do you need? 

Willy

[Neil]

How about meeting the family?  It's pretty easy for me to see how much my wife's brothers and parents love and protect her.  It would be difficult for her to mislead me and pretend to be in love in front of her parents (but not impossible). 

Also, how about daily communication?  It would be pretty difficult to deceive many men and also chat/email/skype with all of them. 

If someone is so desperate as to be blind to the obvious signs, they deserve to be taken for a ride.  I wouldn't recommend any relationship out of desperation.  Words to live by: if it's too good to be true, it probably is. (I receive scam emails from Western Union telling me they want to send me $500,000 almost every other day).

[shaun]

And I bet there are scams that are even more despicable than this one.   I think I met a woman like that the first trip to China.  She offered to translate for Peggy and me and then asked me at the end of my trip for 600RMB a day.  Peggy tells me that she stays in her apartment all day long on the computer talking in English.

[ChinaTraveler]

I don't know ...perhaps I am wrong ...I have seen such stories on other websites... just some common sense from us guys ...these women are writing other men ...and why would you think that you would have to start supporting her while you are still in the writing stage with an occasional visit ?...Support comes with mutual dedication and marriage ...don't you think ? Would you just meet a local woman and after a few weeks together ...start sending her money ? Most large cities in China seems to be in better condition than western cities...!I know that the airport  in GZ makes the airport here in LA seem quite small and second rate . The few women that I have been writing ...all have a good education and a good job,many own their own apartments,cars  ...Just a few thoughts !

[David E]

The whole point of these scams about money, support and rip-off is that while there are Men out there who are stupid enough to send money to Women they hardly know...then there are always many, many Women who will take them to the cleaners.

If you never send money...you will never get scammed.....easy  .....I just dont know why some Guys dont get this...are they the eternal optimists who believe that Fairy Tales always happen, or are they just plain stupid ??

I have a very good friend who married a Russian Woman 3 years ago, they are very happy together and a valued part of my social circle. The Wife cannot get her profile removed from some of these Russian Dating Sites so she continues to get mail from time to time from "Interested" Men.........she even got one Man send her $10,000 for the air fare to meet him in Paris...yes this IS a true story.......I have seen the Bank Transfer details with my own eyes.

[Willy The Londoner]

I think you are all missing the point here. The men all came to Chinas and met the women, beddded and dined with them. You know that men fall in love via a certain part of their anotomy and not their brain.

As far as the men were concerned they had fallen in love and were planning marriage on their next trip. 

Neil, did you meet your wives family on your first visit?  Did you meet the family of Nina of the previous first visit. I did not meet my father in law until after I was married.

It is very easy to say tell the men that they will meet the family next time he comes and that this trip is just for the two of them to get to know each other better.

Willy

[Neil]

Absolutely I met my wife's family on my first visit.  That was very important to both of us.  I spent almost half of my time visiting with her aunt and uncle and nieces.  Most of her family were very worried, prior to my visit, that I would hurt or take advantage of her.  I spent a solid week in her parents home on my second trip before we got married. 

When I met Nina, I also met her nieces prior to any decisions we made.  Maybe that was the deal killer for Nina - it was important for me to meet her parents before we got married, and maybe she know good and well that they would never allow such a marriage to occur. 

I think it is very important to meet her family.  It can give you a good idea of who she is.  When we meet someone for the first time, we always put our good foot forward.  We tend to show our good side, and hide who we really are.  It's only natural.  But our defenses drop when we are around our family - they wouldn't stand for us acting fake or pretending to be someone we aren't.  Well, usually anyway.  Of course, there's always exceptions. 

I married in to my wife's family.  I love them all. 

Of course, the opposite is also true.  She hasn't met my family.  Maybe, after a few months living together in Canada, she'll say to herself: "Damn, I can't believe I married this fool.", and pull the pin.  I sure hope not.

[maxx]

I'm with Neil on this.I did meet my wife's family.And most of her friends.On the first visit.I past the family test.But not her best friend test.It took two trips for me to pass that test.If the woman is series about the relationship.You will probably meet her parents.And a few friends.And maybe some family.

There has ben a couple of members on this forum.Who have posted about meeting there ladies parents.And the parents have gone above and beyond.To make the foreigner comfortable.

Willy also makes a good point.I have seen more then a few members do there thinking with the wrong head.And the woman can tell which head your doing your thinking with.So the woman thinks why Shouldn't She make a little money from this.This guy has flown this far just to see me.I mite as well get something out of it.Then the woman figures out how easy it is.So they start working other men.They know that there are other foreign men out there doing there thinking with the wrong head.As we have all seen Chnlve makes a fortune off of guys who are doing there thinking with the wrong head.

[shaun]

You can meet the family?  I thought that was forbidden.  No, I met momma and the brother who runs the family on the 4th day of my first trip.  All is good.  Momma's birthday is Sunday and the birthday card should be arriving any day now; hand addressed in Chinese.  For the newbies I learned that on this forum.  I already got huge brownie points from Peggy and one of her sisters.  I'll tell you family is everything with these woman and you had better love every one of them.

[Clayton]

After two failed marriages i went into this deal thinking with the head on my sholders only. Maxx is right, it is far too easy to fall in lust only to find later that you have made a huge mistake, hell my first trip there was no kissing,no hugging,no holding hands or arms but i hung in there and i'm glad i did, i'm reaping the rewards . My wife is a traditional Chinese woman, i didn't really know what that meant but i soon found out, i was being sized up by her friends to start with and once i had ticked those boxes  the second trip i was introduced to her family but only after she was comfortable with me and by that time we were engaged , but still no sugar, that came after marriage ,almost. haha.
The piont i;m trying to make is that i went into this relationship with my eyes wide open, even business like, there was no lust involved, i hope i'm not sounding like an old prood cos nobody likes sex more than me but i did not push the isue, she said in one of her letters to me that when she decided to be with me she would give her all, bloody hell,she wasn't kidding i was a very happy man untill i had to come home and wait for her all over again.
I was introduced to her mother and two brothers at her mum's place where i did the red onvelope thing and a couple of days later we had our big shindig for our engagement, more family and friends, where i was formaly welcomed into there family by her eldest brother, at that stage we were going to be married in Australia so that was the only get together we would formaly have, The immigration department had other ideas so i returned to Wuzhou where we were married and that is when i found out just what family really means , i was made to feel more welcome that i have anywhere els, yes even with the language barrier, i am one of them now and i sicerly hope my family here makes Yan feel as welcome when she arrives as i'm sure they will. So gentelmen what can i say, family first family second and family third and i garanty you, tick all there boxes and you are well on the way to the happiest time of your life
A nephew of mine once asked me did i think he should marry the girl he was dating, i thought about it for a bit and said to him, imagion living the rest of you life with her with NO sex, and i left it at that, well she was gone within a week. So now i find myself taking my own advice haha