Well, at the last moment (actually the very last) I chose to stay in Xiaolan where she was coming home too. This is where we were going to live together, and its where I had made all my plans to live before moving from the states. We traveled by high speed rail from Shaoguan to Guangzhou than got on a bus. Most of the way she took a nap, but she talked with me a few times and made some gestures to me that she still cares for me, nothing major....but I understood.
When the bus stopped in Xiaolan, the plan was for me to continue on to Zhongshan.....but only a few minutes before we arrived I could see the look of happiness on her face, she was pointing out places she likes and she was once more the lady I had come to love so much. So at the last minute, I chose to get off the bus with her and check into a hotel. I called the shipping company and told them to send my stuff to the new hotel and we then went to have dinner together....some of her friends met up with us and I could tell almost instantly that Xiaolan is where she always wanted us to be.....later that night her friends took us to a really cool club and we partied until 4am.....we were both really happy.
Even though we are still only going to be friends, with a chance that we could get back together again, I have chosen to focus on getting my life strait and my business back on track. I am still desperate to get some help locating an apartment...I am hoping to secure a place over the weekend, than get going with what I need to do so that I can live here on my own. I think in part she was not ready to handle me being so dependent upon her to survive in China?...I am sure she wanted to do her best, but living in Shaoguan was a major problem for her since she did not know her way around the city and she had to depend on her sister....who she did not get along with....it was complicated to say the least.
So, now I am staying at a hotel with a "modern" internet connection, have been able to get lots of work done and perform updates and backups to my network that were impossible in Shaoguan. I am so happy to be here I could almost cry....if I EVER return to Shaoguan, there better be a really damn good reason...and I will not stay more than 3 days unless I am getting paid too!!!
My future plan is to as mentioned focus on my life, put a nice little apartment together and try to make some new friends. I do not know if there are any westerners living here?....but think I need to find at least a couple of English speaking people to keep my sanity and help me until I get some Mandarin in my vocabulary. If we ever get back together it will be with a different understanding of how the relationship will work, but I am not even going to think much abut it at this point. I am glad she still wants to be friends, going to dinner or to a club with someone you know is always a good thing....besides that now I can buy nice things for myself and she will see what she is missing out on. I am not a wealthy person by any standards, but the $US dollar goes along way here and life can be good if you do a little planning.
I will not consider any relationship above "friend" status for at least the next 30-60 days. There is simply too much to learn about China, its customs and cultures to expect any relationship to work out until I get more accustomed to this new place....I now call home.
I will still need some help from some folks, Willy I may be calling you over the weekend if some of my plans do not go well. I need a local translator really bad to help me with securing an apartment and some other things...I know your about 30 minutes by bus south of me, so unless I really need to will not impose upon ya, but if you know a translator who can come to Xiaolan to help....give me call.
I may be down, but I am not out....just need to rethink what I THOUGHT I already knew about life here.....reality is a harsh teacher.
