I like this so far on the site.
"I wipe my eye gunk off under my desk, sometimes on the dressing room mirror. I pick my nose when I am driving and flick my boogers out the window, I fart and cough at the same time so that nobody can tell what came from where (because I am a real lady). I blow my nose in the shower all over my hand and then when I go in for that big interview later that day, I use it to shake Mr. White's hand- and boy does it shine! I give the finger liberally while driving through my neighborhood in Los Angeles, San Francisco, and tried to see if I could get it to catch on in Europe (but failed)
I drink forties, coke with whiskey, and spoiled juice. When I get drunk, I give the finger some more and tell strangers to "fuck off." I chew with my mouth open. I once threw piss (not my own, because I am a real lady-remember?) at a guy who fucked me over. I have a higher tolerance than you and dance for nobody but myself. I won't clean up, even after myself. I go ape-shit at garage sales. I go even more ape-shit at the 99-cents store."
I am a beautiful animal.
Dave C