few questions

[Martin]

But please keep writing your opinions and maybe we can help some more. I feel quite a lot of negativity in this thread. But I guess its all to help you realize how things will really go. And what to expect.

Maybe I am wrong, but I don't feel any negativity at all.  I see the guys here being realistic.  Nobody is saying DON'T do this...they are trying to be helpful, with their own knowledge and experiences.  A lack of money can make it difficult, but not impossible.  There are options.  Like has been already said, there is the option to go to school in China to learn to speak the language.  This could also turn into employment if you are excellent at speaking Chinese. An example of a woman who went this route can be found here, at http://sheinchina.blogspot.com/

[Jimmy]

Martin is exactly correct no one will tell you don't do this. But if you do, do it with eyes wide open. And have as much information in your brain as you can get your hands on.
Your native language is one I would bet not many Chinese will know. Sometimes very hard just to find people that speak English.  The point I am trying to make for you is China is long way from home you certainly don't want to forget something and get stuck there.
Your age hey I can't knock it. I wish I could have met my wife when I was your age.

[Willy The Londoner]

I say there are too many foreigners getting to China now. 

Hell I am sure I saw the second western face in Zhongshan yesterday and that is only three months after seeing the first this year.

Willy

[Konig]

i do as say Hajo i play with "open cards" i say to her that it will be hard to get to china very often she answer me like this..
"I am not worry or fear anything that may happen to us in the future, the progress is very important, as long as our hearts are together and we hold hands tightly, I believe every barriers will broke finally, it does not matter that you could not fly to china very often, I could understand this, as long as I know your heart with me, I am happy everyday here. I may miss you a lot, and get sick, hehe."
i also asc her for pictures and she give me her natural photos

Hajo also say they marry mens only to get out from china to search for beter future... well ever woman in the world looking first how much guy is "rich" and then they start to making searius relationship with him... i think true love dont exist anymore it is 21-century it is rare to find true love
but to be honest i will be happy if i can offer her beter live than in china..

i read your post guys and it is good to know what to expect there
so my actualy dream is get enougch money and plan with head trip to china and see if there is a sens make relationship with her
anyway if something will go wrong i will be as turist in china i never was there so i will be enjoy anyway
as i told if something will fail i will just simple quit and give a break

[Rhonald]

Well Konig,

I will disagree - there is something called "TRUE LOVE" This thing called true love is not found, thus the misconception on how rare it is to find it. True Love is made and earned, never found. By understanding that it is a work in progress and not something discovered makes you understand that a bit of common sense is required to handle it. The ability to LOVE is not enough as one needs the ability to nurture it, and thus the need for common sense.

I see you do have the good sense to understand that even if the relationship might fail, that as a tourist to China, you will have an adventure worth remembering. Good luck Konig ........ aaah to be young once again with the world filled with possibilities. 

[ttwjr32]

 Konig,

Follow your heart and do what it feels. Yes sometimes things dont work out like planned.
But is it not better to follow that path than to be older and wondering "what if " .

Just be honest with your girl you are talking to so she knows everything about your situation
and if at a later date she has a opposite effect of were you are then you can walk away with
your head up. Knowing you tried and you were honest with her. Even if she thinks there is more
to your situation.

The members arent being negative just being honest with you about the expenses involved here.
You have opened the line of communication up with a lady so see were the road leads. Dont give her
as i said any false impressions of who you are or what you have. And from your last post it seems
you are doing this. Thats a good start.

I think with your english skills it would be hard for you to live here and work, but if you learn chinese
then you will have opened many doors for yourself here. So that door of work is not completely closed.

Be true to yourself and be true to her and if it doesnt work out then you have nothing to be ashamed of.
Nor would i give up on another lady if it doesnt work out.

Just curious as to what city she is from here in China and what type of lady is she and her family. You see
the home situation and how they are living does mean a lot when searching as to why they are there. There
are many chinese traditions and some are still used by many when they shouldnt be in regard to marriage.
Most of those traditions are for the first young marriage and not the second one after they have been deemed
to old for China. But yet many fall into it and do it after the relationship has gone for a lenth. So that is were
everything should be discussed before even meeting. And i will say that does not stop it from changing later.

But as we all know life is full of chances and this is a chance worth trying for and developing because when you
fnd the right one it is absolutely terrific. remember be honest and true to yourself

Best of luck in your journey because if you do find a lady without all the obstacles it can be very rewarding
because you will find a wonderful lady to share life with.

[Konig]

im speaking with mhm "my lady" i exchange with her many letters like 20.. we speak like 3 weeks now.. she showed my her natural photos,photos of her brothers and sister and her best friend.. she told me abaut her childhood abaut her family... how she told me she is from simple farm family.. and she moved to city to work there and be independent from parents
we speak alot of topics.. she is also very open and dont afraid of private or intimate questions.. she asc me about how many kids i wanna have in future ect and about "virgin" i tell her yes im i never have any contact with woman.. she also told me she is a virgin and she says to me she will give "virgin" to a man who will spend all her live with her.. not just random seduction i will paste one think she says
"love first, sex first. I heard a lot of girls give their virgin to a man, but still broke up finally, if we respect ourselves, others will also respect us, right? the more easier someone get you, the more fast he will want leave you away. This is what my good friend told me. so I cherish my virgin very much. "
im just suprise about that.. in america and europe womans like too sleep with all army of mens just for simple pleasure of sex and they dont care of this
i see in china "sex" thinks is very respectable and im very happy of this im also a man who dont like sleep with many girls just for fun i wanna have one woman who i will be love all my live i dont search for "adventures"
well sorry for "sexual" thinks i wrote here i wana share with you guys my feelings and know what you thinking of this
i speak with her honest and nothing hide from her we talk abaut many topics
you guys says many "girls" will steal my hearth.. and it is true im kind of interesting abaut this relationship
and i agree with you Ronald true love exist.. but i have something difrend in mind

and sorry for my english.. i dont write perfect grammar i make many mistackes in simple worlds ect
but in real talk i dont have problems with it.. i was in bulgaria and germany alone and i speak only english there and everything was fine

[Konig]

hello everone

im back here again to share with you all my feelings
i speak with my lady till my first post here
we decided speak 1 time per week in weekends she understand me prety
well that posting to echoder cost alot and i collect money right now for ticked to china
we both talk about when i first time go to her and she see me she will start collect money go to my country also
well speaking is fine with her she also give me her phone number but i cant send sms to china from my country :/ i will try by skype
we exchange many photos of aurselfs and everything is looking now great
but i still keep you all advices what you all give me... i can be broken hearth ect but this is live and this also will be new expirience to me and i also will see first time china in my live

[maxx]

Koing good luck.and yes try skype.Or maybe QQ most people in China have QQ so maybe you can see each other thiere.

[shaun]

Good to hear from you Konig and good luck.

[halfpint]

Konig

I wish you the best.  You may be younger than most on here, and it will be a challenge for you, but maybe that's what makes it worthwhile.  I was 20 years old when I met my wife.  She was chinese and the most beautiful lady I'd ever met.  Marrying her was the best decision I ever made.  Good luck to you!  Alan 

[neal]

Hello Konig
Don't worry about what you are hearing about how much money this adventure is going to cost. You just go for it once you are ready to go to China! I think people here should be commending you not trying to put you off. I know how hard Polish people work and focused they can be. I had about 15 Polish guys working for me in England and I was impressed by their work ethic. Don't worry about your English it is fine for someone who speaks it as a second language, I wonder how some would handle Polish as a second language. I'm well impressed with your ambition and wish you the best of luck! Your $3000 will get you to China and probably allow you to stay for around 3 - 4 weeks, in fact I would say you have perhaps one of the shortest flights of anyone I know who's coming here from the West. Poland is part of the EU now so your living standard will eventually increase and so will your prospects, you keep hold of your dream! Chinese parents will listen to someone from Europe who is not loaded with money but can offer their daughter a better life! And I'm sure your optimism will carry the day. Good luck.

[Willy The Londoner]

Kong a 20 year old Westerner sitting in MacDonalds for a few hours during the lunch period will get more than enough contact telephone numbers to last a long time.

I think that Chnlove.com is not the route you should be taking.

Come here for three weeks and I guarantee a man of your age will see what opportunities are truly available. And no ems from who knows who.  You will have so many phone numbers and QQ, email addresses from people that you have seen and met.

The biggest problem is just where will she learn Polish in China if you intend to take her to live in Poland!

Willy

[Hajo]

Hello Konig,

Nice to read that you and your lady have good conversation. If SMS not work on skype, you can try http://www.talk2china.com/. I think they give you 4 SMS free to try. Then you can buy 500 or 1000. With it you can send SMS directly to China and your lady can send you back. She will only pay the Chinese price for SMS.

Do not apologize for your English. Nobody is perfect. As long as we answer your questions, we understand you.

Good luck for your future!