Author Topic: Hebei, Round 2  (Read 35083 times)

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Offline lfputman3

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #150 on: February 03, 2012, 01:59:46 am »
well, I would apologize, but I'm sure it's understandable that we have been dealing with a little baggage and coping mechanisms are often inadequate for certain things in this wonderful adventure called life.

She recently visited the doctor because she is still having some pains and they (the doc) has given a preliminary diagnosis of a cyst. She is in full panic mode and I am stuck here. So we know a big part of the cause and now we have to wait a couple weeks for more tests. In the mean time, it's wedding planning and me crying (because the bill is racking up to rival an American wedding).

I am finishing up with some of the less known paperwork that some of us vets get to file before getting the remainder of her visa paperwork submitted. I was going over the tax requirements and cussed because I had two 'not happy' years a couple years back and one of them falls into the requested 3 year window, it is over the minimum number, but I really do not like taking certain risks. I talked to an attorney friend, who asked another friend for me and the recommendation was talk to the family and the advice was talk to my family. Mom and dad are going to put in a joint sponsorship for the visa, which the other attorney stated, "Accountant/Military vet and his retired parents, with father that is also a military vet, should sew any questions closed." Which is good, because I think her mama has gone overboard on the wedding planning for the party in March.

The "wedding" details so far that I know, My folks and my long time best bud from the army, along with little sister are going. Possibly a couple other of mom's relatives. Unfortunately not the ones we were hoping for, because that cousins wife just succumb to a five year battle with cancer. Ironically, it took off two months after he sold his company in silicone valley and they were looking for some quality retirement time. Now he also has cancer.... Guess it truly comes in waves.

So we will be staying at one of three hotels, I am not sure which one, because people are attempting to "help" find a "suitable" hotel for my parents.... which is trying my last nerve on that one. They are afterall, my parents and I chose the hotel based on the fact that I know them and the fact that they don't care if they are on the 3rd floor or the 27 floor.  We were just going to rent a couple buicks for the wedding, but we have been informed that is not allowed and we will be using BMWs. I got out of the bulk of the dress shopping, but we couldn't find "The" white dress in China, so I had to buy it here, now the dress shop is taking their time and I need to get it in the mail for alterations there. I have been told by several other women who have seen the catalog pics, "Wow! that is amazing!"
The restaurant has not changed (yet) however the whole statement I made a couple months ago about, "that's expensive for food in America" hit a powerful financial chord with her mama.

The latest burning question (not the house, b/c I shot that down faster than a patriot missile on a scud) when are we having a "western" wedding after she gets her visa and comes to America. One of mama's friends didn't like the fact that my mom issued that answer, being, "we are delighted to have a new daughter and welcome her into our life and family, but we are not the vanderbilts, kennedy's or any other of those families and we will have a reception dinner/party, but no second wedding, as it is not in our traditions."

btw, the house issue, her laolao was pushing it and the response was, "she entered into a 'naked' marriage willingly," btw, that's a naked wedding as in no Chinese house, "and I will not hand over money to purchase a home that we will only use for two weeks out of the year only to wonder if we are going to retire there or not, just so some money grubbing wicked old lady can move out of her worthless son's house."

It's a good thing her mama and most of the rest of her family like me. I never expect laolao or her father to ever approve of me, but her uncle (dad's big brother) supports her nainai and gave me a thumbs up with a handshake. laolao reminds me of my own late grandmother too much. the only difference I see between the two is laolao has a sense of style. where my paternal grandmother just made grandpa miserable.

Ok, well, I think I'm tired, have to get up and get back to work by 9am again tomorrow.

She's been moody again the last two days, but I understand why. We just have to stick together and work through this little disappointment and turn of events. and hope that it doesn't get worse.

Lloyd
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Offline lfputman3

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #151 on: February 03, 2012, 02:08:57 am »
I did promise a couple pics from that horrible day....
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Arnold

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #152 on: February 03, 2012, 02:43:16 pm »
I did promise a couple pics from that horrible day....

Ohhhh.. how "Horrible" those Photo's are !!!! :o                                             Not!

Offline lfputman3

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #153 on: February 06, 2012, 06:24:05 pm »
I freely admit I do a light amount of yoga, not every day and not in any structured class. I do the positions that work for me and keep from aging faster than I am (those unscheduled landings in a helo do have an effect on the body). I also routinely see a chiropractor, b/c of similar issues to the aging factor. Some things need a gentle push to stay in line, the spine and neck being very important to me...

However, the amount of work my chiropractor had to perform on my neck following that photo shoot. Trust me, it was horrible, my high school pictures and being a wrestler (American Federation aka, High School / Collegiate style as well as Freestyle with the once great Dan Severn for a coach)....

The point, that photo shoot sucked and we both hurt the rest of the day and the following morning. I endured it for her, but she and I both wanted to kill the photographer.


Other news.... I just found out my parents, who have committed to going to the wedding still have not bought plane tickets. I am beginning to feel a little jilted here. Mom is happy that I'm happy, but apparently the planned money for the plane tickets disappeared and now dad has new golf clubs. Which I have to support mom's frustration, considering he was given a brand new set of the top of line Taylor clubs last spring. I think mom has every right to threaten him repeatedly and he's acting stupidly about it and then wonders why, after I found out about the clubs, he is getting no sympathy from me or any of my siblings...

Life is often filled with ridiculous drama and at the moment I am trying to find out why I haven't heard from my lovely wife the last couple days. I'm hoping it isn't some problem with what we have learned already...  I am honestly worried and it is affecting my work. Granted, I suddenly have no clients and it's tax season... which also has me worried.

Everyone please pray, while I try to get in contact with my beautiful Yuan.

Lloyd
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Offline lfputman3

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #154 on: March 25, 2012, 07:47:08 am »
Ok, wow, yeah, time flies, I haven't been here and we've been taking care of "things"

The good news, the medical issue that arose is taken care of. In light of the event that happened, her mama is happy to know that when we want to, we can give her grand-babies.

The joyous news, 我们的婚礼! My parents and sister came along, they had a riot of a time. I can hear my sister laughing the whole time on the video. with the occasional mom giggle and dad chuckle. I'll be posting pics and there's a homevideo being edited on the computer over the next few days. The big formal Day was March 16. It went off without a hitch, but the next day after we got settled at the house, the *ahem* agency called asking for money. Apparently grandma is the one running her mouth. Mama has been ripping her every day since. She did apologize to me, twice. I'm still not impressed and still not happy.

The bad news, we're back on with the long f*g wait. You all know which one. In the meantime, enjoy the pics.

Oh, I found a new hobby in China. I'll post a pic from my class. Our friend owns owns one of the English schools in the county, he has 4 schools, I'm getting my TEFL/TESOL (as we speak). We've agreed on a price (no, I'm not telling any of you, it's my cash cow) and I'll sign the contract when I come back in June and I'm teaching for 4 months (then I have to get back and prep for tax season.

The wife and I are also planning a business enterprise in Michigan. She wanted to do a foot spa, but upon further investigation, it's not practical in my area. So we are going to open a tea shop. Of which, there are no actual tea shops in Lansing and 4 malls with open store fronts. We're going for the mall that's anchored with the rich neighborhood and some high end restaurants. Seems logical and the only other place claiming to be a tea "anything" is next to the campus of MSU and is sandwich shop claiming to be a tea house. None of the Asian or middle-eastern students go there, so they must only serve bag tea. I have not yet visited the establishment, simply b/c the Chinese grocery I go to badmouthed them. That's reason enough to think we can sink them with a proper tea shop.

So, as promised, pics....
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Offline lfputman3

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #155 on: March 25, 2012, 07:56:41 am »
I'm a trying, it only let me do one after I shrunk them down.
so here's the next one....
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Offline lfputman3

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #156 on: March 25, 2012, 08:00:46 am »
the next one is for Willy,   ;D

     one of the interludes while we changed clothes
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Offline lfputman3

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #157 on: March 25, 2012, 08:04:31 am »
this is my class....

bunch of good kids, outstanding and respectful to the teacher, hands never went down....
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Offline lfputman3

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #158 on: March 26, 2012, 12:16:44 am »
So to give more details on this trip and the events that happened, I shall attempt a proper update for you. However I am time limited b/c we are going to the new 'hot spring' park in Handan. If you're curious John, it's out by the freeway and I understand completely indoors.

So it took some time to get my dad to realize he needed to buy his and mom's tickets for the airport. I took care of their hotel reservations. However here in Handan, dad's cards only worked at the ATM, which was a bit obnoxious at the hotel. He still owes us about $200. Which her mama is a little concerned about. No worries for me, he will take care of it today. He couldn't find the deposit slip I left on my home desk (in plain sight, where my laptop normally sits, directly in front of my home printer).

Aside from the slow Tax season I am experiencing. I'm guessing b/c I turned a guy in for an Audit (he wouldn't give me all the required documents and there is only one way an accountant can protect himself and his fellow accountants, after all, we do talk to one another). The common case of the IRS doesn't care how Americans make their money, only that they claim it. When you tell your accountant, after he accepts you as a client, that you may also have made some money in 'questionable' business dealings and that's how you paid cash for your new car and fishing boat, you have to tell the accountant and IRS how much money you made doing so. Again, the IRS doesn't care 'how' you made the money, only that you pay your taxes. The FBI/DEA/ATF and other law enforcement groups care, but that is not the IRS' concern on the matter.

The worst thing that happened, as I'm sitting in the airport in Detroit, preparing to fly to Beijing, I receive word from my friend (brother and best friend from my army days) he is sitting in Narita(Tokyo), the Chinese authorities deported him, b/c his bloody travel agent gave him a stinking Hong Kong visa, not a PRC visa. Now he lives in Portland, OR, so I understand his desire to let the agent, who is apparently attached to Delta airlines, handle the matter of the Visa, b/c Portland to Frisco is not a one day deal. Unlike my going to Chicago. I partially blame myself, I should have double checked with him that he did indeed have a PRC visa and made him show me via cam his visa. The real ripper, They confiscated his alcohol and tobacco which he purchased the tobacco at a local reservation for even cheaper than I get them at any of the res' in Michigan. The alcohol really pissed him off, b/c he had purchased two magnums of Johnny Walker.... They also confiscated all the documents from the Airlines that had cleared him for travel to Beijing. I'm guessing that was damage control, b/c he's got a lawsuit pending. Just small claims, but the lawyers hate small claims more, they have to do something, there's no delaying small claims courts.

My poor parents, I dropped them off in Flint at 4AM, they were supposed to fly to Cleveland then DC and to Beijing. The airline canceled the Dulles flight and the were rerouted to Atlanta, then Chicago, but they made it there ok and Dad had called me in Detroit from Atlanta, they were to join my sister on her flight to Beijing. Sister ran to the Atlanta gate, met them. Fortunately, it was only three gates down from the Beijing flight. Without my brother awaiting them in Beijing, they decided to wait in the airport for my flight to arrive, (I did Air Canada this trip, DTW-YYZ-PEK) and I have to say, I like. Still get my miles too, thank you Star Alliance.

We didn't even make it to the elevator when a guy from the Beijing taxi company with a Buick van approached us, asked how many, where to and we were good. We definitely had too much baggage for regular taxi and I didn't want to take my parents through the Beijing subway at rush hour. Not pretty, besides, my sister is claustrophobic and the train station was rough enough for her. My beautiful bride could not meet us in Beijing, her mama said so, b/c she needed to complete certain pre-wedding rituals. They accomplished them all one day early so they could spend the day before the wedding with my family.

At the hotel, we had an issue with my and my parents rooms. I had booked them online and prepaid. The hotel didn't receive the reservation from Agoda, first time issue for me. Took about thirty minutes to resolve, always good to have girls at the desk hear you say, but my wedding is in two days and we have reservations and paid for Suites. We didn't get suites, but they did get us taken care of. The ticket agency I use for the train tickets had dropped off our tickets, but the hotel put them under my brother's name. His name 'O' our name 'P', so moderate confusion, until they realized I was asking for 5 tickets and they had 5 ticket unclaimed, b/c that person had never checked in. I told the concierge what happened and they were very understanding. Check our passports and gave me the five tickets.

We went around the corner from the hotel, found a place that had noodles without mushrooms (dad is severely allergic). Mom said the noodles were too spicy (saw that one coming).

Everyone crashed and the next morning I drug everyone into BeijingXiZhan, fun experience, I grabbed mine and mom's bags and ran up the stairs for the walkway. Dad said I was going to fast, until he realized we had just bumrushed security and he was holding back proably about 200 people who were all getting angry with him at the bag scanner.  ;D  No breakfast yet, b/c we were taking the 8am train to Handan(Hankou D121). We found our waiting room, piled our bags together, grabbed mom and dad, sis watched the bag mound while we ran over to a bakery and got some pastry for breakfast (dad discovered Chinese Egg Tarts :o and is now asking for me to bring some home. Dad's main complaint, no good black coffee, we introduced him to Long Qing tea, he's ok now. Met up with a friend of mine and Yuan's who owns the English school I will be teaching at this summer. He found out I was getting my TEFL/TESOL and went back to Beijing after the wedding to get certified for Foreign Teachers. Arrived in Handan at 12, mama and friends drove the whole lot of us to lunch at arguably the best KaoYa place in Handan, Jin-something, they are a Beijing  company, so thus, the best 'Beijing KaoYa' in Handan. I tend to agree after eating at a few KaoYa joints around town. Dad, who hates duck, loved it. My sister still said it was greasy, but she just did a huge detox/weight loss system that had next to no fat and no starches. It sounds insane and people think you're starving when you do, but I've done it and I will be doing it again with her after I return from this trip. 

I don't remember where we went for dinner that night, it was blur after the check-in, I know the next day, I ran down to get breakfast b/c of all the wedding, no food to eat until late that night stories that I have seen, read and heard around the internet. When I got back to the room, uncle (actual mama's brother) was waiting with a photographer and a video camera.... "oh, we get to watch the groom get dressed on the wedding video?"  :o

So we did the getting ready thing, grabbed the ring, the flowers and proceeded to find my dad (warning him about the cameraman) he and I went out side the hotel. A few minutes later mom and sis joined us. Then we went over to Congtai for some pics. I'll post a couple later, my sis has them on her computer and we have not yet received the ones from the studio yet. Mom and sis were 'thrilled' to walk all over Congtai, in heels, formal gowns and me and Teacher(our friend who played translator for us) explaining that this was my family and the wedding was yet to happen. Someone finally got my sister a flower and people realized she wasn't the bride. :-\

Few more pictures and videos, the cars pulled up, Mercedes, I thought she said we were doing BMW or Audi, I tried arguing for Buick's, b/c dad is a GM retiree. He knows I tried, he was happy. My sister had to get pictures of the circus known as decorating the grooms car.

Pile into the cars, pull out, fireworks, slow caravan, long way around to the house (through a hole in the back fence apparently reserved for wedding caravans).

Oh, mama and Yuan said it's time to eat, I'll post more tonight....


Lloyd
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Offline maxx

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #159 on: March 26, 2012, 10:30:07 am »
congradulations sounds like you had a good time.Best wishes to you and your lovely wife.

Offline lfputman3

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #160 on: March 26, 2012, 12:15:09 pm »
ok, to continue....

So the caravan arrived at the house, more fireworks, confetti canons when I climbed out of the car. They brought my parents into the house with me. My helper (our friend who owns the school) wanted to take the stairs, but the wedding coordinator at the house, pushed us to the elevator, good thing, nine floors is long way in a tux.

Arrived at the door, no games until we were in the house. My parents were ushered to the couch, my sister in the chair next to them. Lots of pictures being taken, people oggling my sisters hair and the material of her dress. Down the hall to mama's room. I guess Yuan's (our) room isn't large enough for the party, or the number of people in the house. Two games at the bedroom door, first "Who is going to do the laundry?" They loved my answer, "We both will do the laundry, b/c some days, Yuan will be tired and I will do it for her and other days, I will be busy at work." Happy chatter, giggles at the concept of a man doing laundry. Next game, sing a song with the word "love" and I drew a total blank....  .... "tell Yuan you love her" So I shouted out "Yuan, wo ai ni!" more giggles, the door opened and there she was. magnificent, beautiful and just jaw dropping in appearance. Last game, find the shoes. Found the shoes, it wasn't hard to find them.

So we proceeded to the living room, lots of pictures, none on my camera, so I can't share those just yet. I was saved the joy of the Handan face painting, b/c Yuan and her mama take claim to be dongbeiren, not Handanren. Mama and her family are from Shandong (Rizhao) and her father's family is from Liaoning.
More pictures yet again. We finally proceed downstairs to the car, more confetti canons and fireworks. Pictures of us getting into the car, waving from the car and another slow caravan to the restaurant.

The simple part I could handle easiest and her friends joking the whole time, "Hello, thank you for coming." The big shock to us, her father did actually come to the wedding, he was smiling, shook my hand happily with a grin...   :o  and here he was totally against our wedding in the first place. The bad news, her nainai is apparently ill and could not make the wedding, we are going to see her this week. So we finally went up the dinner hall. People smiling saying "Hi!/Hello!" pictures with the bride and groom. We had about 250 people at a lose count. We were reimbursed for the wedding (red envelops) We actually came out ahead, made mama happy, made me happier, because mama sank enough money into the wedding to make me cry and grow a couple white hairs. Our dinner alone was roughly $2500 US. which considering what feeding 250 people in America costs, we did good there. The final bill for the wedding came out to about $12K US. So we might as well have had a wedding in America...  but I'm not gonna complain, because the day went off without a hitch. We were introduced, exchanged rings, drank wine (grape not baijiu). Cut the cake, poured champagne and then went to change, cue the entertainment, (Willy, I know you would have loved those girls) there were three singing acts. I saw the tail end of the third act. Heard part of the second act. Never saw the girls, except in pics and on video from my dad... He said they were great and when he said so, mom scowled at him.

We did the tea service for the parents, there is a great pic that I have to upload from my sister, her dad has this look of total dismay on his face as the tea was coming out.

She opted for "special bridal tea" I still got to do a few shots at some of the tables.

Everyone seemed happy and Yuan grinned like a cat all day long.

People started to go, I helped her change again. We left for the hotel, some of the family greeted us there. Went upstairs at the hotel, representative of my house of course. relaxed for a bit, went to dinner with my parents and her mama. sent the bulk of our stuff with mama to the house and went back to the room.

Yeah, we all know what happened after that, so no details, sorry guys.

We spent a couple days shuffling my family around Handan, seeing the sites. The day before they left, it got cold. I mean, it was snowing cold. Sis has pictures to prove it. We all got a laugh about that. My parents wanted to buy kites for my nephews, I married the right girl, she beat my dad to the punch. He is notorious for grabbing the check at dinner, buying things unexpectedly and such. The Kite vendor handed my dad the kites and dad asked how much... Yuan just started laughing and I couldn't help but join as dad got this look of shock on his face that she had already paid for the kites.

We also took my parents and sis to a real Chinese tea shop. After seeing one, they agree, the mall I've chosen for our shop is perfect and we should do very well with a shop there. Especially on Friday and Saturday nights in the summer and fall. Dad played tourist, snapping pics, but told me he would check with a few people we know about the shelving. We also got dad to drink and say he liked Tea...    :o  ... he hates tea...   :o

Long Jing, he's hooked, damn that's an expensive habit, but if he'll drink it, that's all the better. Mom found two trays that match her living room tables (Italian black marble from a green vein in the rock. She didn't buy them, but I know she wants one. It's an idea for a Christmas gift this year.

We still have 4 cases of baijiu and a case of smokes following the wedding.  :-[ don't know what we're going to do with those. I told her I would take a couple bottles with me. I know some people I haven't killed with it yet  ;D

Thus, our fun filled wedding week. my parents and sis took the train to Beijing, dad was thrilled that the hotel had a western restaurant. sis got a little peek at Wangfujing and the next day they all went to the airport and headed out home.

So now the part we all just despise and loathe, we return to the wait for her visa. My parents said after meeting her, they definitely want to co-sponsor her visa. Which is awesome, because dad's name carries the weight of political friends. However, we all know that in the end, that doesn't mean squat. It's all up to whoever does the interview in Guangzhou. Right now we are hoping she can have her interview before the end of summer. With my plans to come and teach this summer, we are also planning a weekend in Korea, b/c I have two friends there, one is in Seoul and the other is in Pyongtaek. Flights from Beijing to Inchon are on the cheap, which is good. My friend in Seoul would be a short visit, while we see a couple of the sights. The friend in Pyongtaek is an Army buddy, I trained him years ago and now the little bastard done went and become an officer, just got his second promotion in the officer ranks, so I have to give him hell about that one. Just wait until my lovely bride finds out what soju is   :P

For now, that's all, I'll try and get a link to the video when I post it, probably on that Tube site. For now, I have her hooked on Facebook. Which she's a QQ addict anyway. She loves the games, all the silly little games. She even more likes the fact that I did the family plan for the VPN, so both computers and both iPhones can now access any website that doesn't bring all the global authorities attention.

I've even taught her how to clean out her caches and gave her a couple cleaning programs to scrub out the spyware and of course China's markers for her using VPN.
She hasn't told her mama she has access to the full internet yet. I'm guessing b/c she thinks mama will want to shop somewhere beside taobao.

Later for now
Lloyd
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Offline Clayton

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #161 on: March 26, 2012, 06:02:37 pm »
Crikey Lloyd I need a days rest and I only red about your adventures haha.
It sounds like you had the time of your life though and I'm glad for you and Yuan ,it all worked out well for you.
I tell you what , I'm a very patient man ( you have to be to go through the visa process ) but i think you take the cake when it comes to patience, somewhere through that hole process of getting everyone organised to your wedding and everything Else that was going on I would have spat the dummy I'm sure.
It must be a huge relief for you to just kick back and relax with your beautiful wife after all the dust had settled.
It's funny, I've never been a fan of big weddings but I have been riveted to your story all the way, you made me feel like i was there with you and I thank you for that.
If only I could tell a story as good as you, I would write book about my own experiences.

Thanks for the story Lloyd, can't wait to see the photos.

Cheers
Leeroy
This is the way to go

Offline RobertBfrom aust

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #162 on: March 27, 2012, 02:16:45 am »
Part 1 and now part 2 , Congratulations to you and Yuan and to all that helped pull of a marvelous wedding feast , it did feel like we were there just being flies on the wall reading it  , so enjoy , kick back and relax , regards Sujuan and Robert .
Now it is early to bed and late to rise .
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Offline john1964

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #163 on: March 27, 2012, 06:19:13 am »
Lloyd and Yaun, Congratulations with the special day going off without a hitch, Wow what an update, You must have spent hours writing it, I hope the visa goes well for you both and I know waiting sucks, Only a week left for me now and I will once again set foot in Handan. MinYing and John.

Arnold

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Re: Hebei, Round 2
« Reply #164 on: March 27, 2012, 04:31:39 pm »
Yeah, we all know what happened after that, so no details, sorry guys.

If it was what happened to Qing and I.. I'm Sorry!                                                  NOT!


Very nice Wedding update for us, for you two..  it can never be duplicated! Wonderful X 1000 ! Can't wait for some Pict's and thanks for letting this Forum be part of your "Life's" moment.