Wednesday night, Yuan's English teacher, decided he would coerce me into hiring his service as our wedding MC for the actual party, but plying me with alcohol. This was my introduction to Baijiu... this was bad... very bad... they are still teasing me about the after effects and the fact that I was dumb enough to say, "fuwu'yan, liang ge piujiu!" after having a few beers, after having only two of us kill a bottle of baijiu... very bad.. I have done worse, we discussed it. She know understands why I try not to drink much anymore. When I drink, I like to drink. Which is great in view of people watching me knock them back, but we got home, I sat on the bed, then ran for toilet... very, very bad... However, we are going to use him as an MC when we have the party, because mama insists on a Party, I want the personal joy of watching my dad drink tea and some of my family would be upset if I had the chance to invite them to a wedding in China and did not do so. Along with a couple of my parents close friends, one of whom I call my other mom. Ironically, it's the Hamtramck/Garden City branch of the family that most wants to see a Chinese wedding. I think they just like weddings and partying myself.
Wake up call by mama at 3AM, arduous hours in the car, The horrendous pain in my legs from squeezing into the back of a Kia Soul for 6 hours to Beijing, 2 hours to find the embassy because mama would not hear of us using a cab or the subway to get to the embassy. Then "uncle" getting lost despite having a GPS, I was done at the embassy by 11:00, but it took us 3 hours to get out of Beijing, rather scenic drive through all of the Chaoyang district, I think mama and uncle asked every embassy guard in Chaoyang how to get to the American Embassy. Then when we finally got there, uncle said it didn't have an American flag, therefore wasn't the American Embassy.... So we got back to Handan late... We passed Shijiazhuang at around 7 PM and uncle finally found the gas pedal again. Thankfully it was just Yuan and I in the backseat. Very good considering I was pretty much sick as hell and showed up looking hungover to the embassy. The receptionist gave me grief and I apologized stating, if uncle and mama had been nicer and let Yuan and I just hop a cab once we go to Beijing, I'd have been early and she could have seen me looking even more rough because of the baijiu experience. She snickered at the baijiu comment and as I left she wished me well. I know the Vice Counsel who handled the notary stamp said something to her after he and I talked about Yuan's education. I think I know what she was initially thinking. The embassy procedure was of course short, brief and obnoxiously boring, felt guilty when I was only in there for about 20 minutes total and there were a couple guys who had been there for various reasons waiting for whatever they were doing for almost 2 hours already, waiting on the interviewer.
Friday, not so lucky in the backseat, auntie wanted to come along to Shijiazhuang... three adults in the backseat of a Kia Soul and Yuan is about 5 foot 7 inches, tall for a Chinese girl, I happen to enjoy the fact, being just under 6 feet myself. Mama likes it because she believes she is going to have tall grandchildren. However in the short term, I wish mama had bought a nice Buick, Ford, or anything with more than 3 inches of legroom in the back of the hamster wagon, but I've been very good, have not complained and Yuan knows I'm hurting in that backseat when we go on one of these long road trips. Again we had a 3AM wakeup, at least I wasn't ill from the night before although I was confused as to why we left so early, until we got to Shijiazhuang and uncle again had to ask every cop and taxi driver where the building was we were going to... He really is a nice guy, give you the shirt of his back type... but he is the last person I want driving in the future... So we did find the marriage agency office before it opened, actually in time to finally get something to eat for breakfast. Chinese doughnuts and Yuan and I had dumpling soup...
The agency complained about us not having a translated copy of the single affidavit, but the embassy would only let me use their affidavit form. Did the application at one office, then she sent us over to another office where we signed some other papers and then uncle blew of the GPS and drove through the middle of town North to South and out the back way and we took the scenic way home. Sadly, the only scenery was cornfields and small villages. Cornfields I can see at home, I have no idea why he wanted to go that way, but I kept my mouth shut and sucked it up. We stopped at a little hole-in-wall place for lunch, not in a village, we were in Xingtai, which is about as attractive as Flint on a bad day... most of the food was good, mama has this obsession that my favorite food is beef, she ordered a stew for me, and they served us gnarly, tough old hormone flooded bull meat. Everyone agreed with me the meat was too tough and the flavor was off, auntie took the beef to feed to her dog.
Halfway back to Handan, they finally let Yuan drive and I got to sit in the front seat, my legs were happy, there was definitely more room in the front...
We took the car to the car wash, because, well, two days driving cross country in China with a white car leaves an incredibly filthy white car. After the car wash we went to a bath house, unique experience. Most of it was good, the only part that bothered me was the whole concept of another guy scrubbing my junk, which of course most western men are not comfortable with. Having been in the army, walking around a giant room with several dozen other naked men is not so disturbing. Just the whole scrubbing thing...
We had dinner at the bathhouse, the English teacher showed up for dinner, we talked and started planning the wedding ceremony, there is a compromise in motion that her mama is being very understanding about. If she wants my parents at the wedding, then we have to plan farther out than two months. Simple logistics and West vs. East culture of wedding etiquette. We are going for a date in late March, this gives me time to coordinate any family and friends that wish to attend. Also, time to get mom's help in forcing dad onto the plane to come to China. He's afraid we're going to feed him cat, bugs and monkey brains, I forgive him, he was in Vietnam before I was born. I was informed that I am required to buy a diamond ring for the wedding ceremony, this following the gold ring I got for the engagement and filing of the marriage certificate. Mama is demanding, but I understand, she wants proof of financial commitment to her only child.
So yes, it's official, here it is, Saturday and I woke up this morning with my wife.
I went to bed, knowing that my whole world is changed forever and woke up still with smile and her in my arms. Now she is giving me hell for spending too much time telling all of you what has transpired the last few days and we need to go pray for our wedding date.
farewell for now,
A happily married and contented Lloyd
