Fiancee's 7 yr old not coming yet

[Wilfred Motosue]

Hi Everyone.
We just filed a K-1. My fiancee has a 7 year old girl and my fiancee's ex-husband wants to keep his daughter in China because he is worried because he does not know me and does not know her environment where I live (Hawaii). My finacee understands that so after we obtain her VISA and live together for perhaps 6 months to a year, she will talk to her ex-husband again about letting their daughter come to live with us. My fiancee feels that when she says it's okay in Hawaii, her ex-husband will let her go to Hawaii to be with us. Does anyone have any experience with what the VISA people will feel about my fiancee's daughter not being included in the K-1 application for now? Is it a "red-flag" item to them, you think? Thanks for your time on this question.

[lfputman3]

all I can say is, "good luck" you're going to need it if he's being a twinkie. I found out, because VA is "threatening" to relocate me to Hawaii, that most people in Hebei and Beijing know exactly where and what Hawaii is.

So he's just being difficult, that's what ex's do, or so I'm told, I'd never know, as I only have ex-girlfriends who didn't cut the mustard.

Now I'm just going for it...

[Wilfred Motosue]

Hi Everyone,
Thanks for all of your input and advice. I wrote to my attorney who submitted our K-1 and told her that my fiancee's daughter is not going to Hawaii with her mother but may posssibly join her later after eveything is settled with my finacee's ex-husband and she gets his approval. This is her response which I think is what all of you are saying too, I think.

"The application identifies the daugher only as her child.  Once the visa is approved, the daughter has the option to come with her, but she is not required to come with mom.  If she decides to come within 1 year of mother's entry to US, we can notify the ambassy for actions on the daughter's visa"

[Wilfred Motosue]

I just sent an email to my attorney asking:

Should we be concerned that "the application identifies the daughter ONLY as her child"?

I don't know who has custody of their child so should be check with Apple on that? would that make a difference it really was joint custody or only his custody?

Her reply was:

The application requires listing of April's children only. It does not require custody information.

There is no problem at this point, unless in the future, husband does not agree to the child's immigration.

Hmmmmmm. What if her ex-husband doesn't give permission ? Then what?? What kind of problem would it be , I am wondering. Hopefully not with VISA Immigration people I hope.

[Wilfred Motosue]

Hi Scott,
No, I don't blame the ex-husband at all. And that's what I told my fiancee. I would be afraid to let my daughter go too. I will ask my fiancee tonight when she thinks I should meet her ex-husband. My fiancee is on good terms with her ex-husband and his wife. I told my fiancee that I should meet her ex many months before already and she agreed. I need to put him at ease as much as possible, if i can. Of course after my fiancee tells her ex how good it is in Hawaii then hopefully he'll agree to let her come to be with us.

One good side effect is that me and my to-be-wife will have some adjustment time to ourselves before her daughter comes to join us. 
Wilfred

[Willy The Londoner]

I cannot blame the girls friend either.  Too many men prey on women to get to grips with their children.  He does not know you and you have not yet proven yourself to be the man he who he would trust to bring up his daughetr in safety.  This can take many months sometimes years.

In my other life I came across many examples where children were not trated as they should be so you will have to play a waiting game.  It maybe when he has had custody of his daughter for a long time he may well not want to give her up.  That is a risk that you and others have to take when there are young children involved.

I hope it will work out ok for you but be prepared if in time it does not go in the favour of your wife.

Willy