You hit a ball as far as you can, go and find it and hit it again and repeat the process for about 4 miles or so. Plus you need a few loud mouths along the way shouting 'In The Hole'!
I've been hearing that for years but not always during golf.
But then this game was invented in Scotland - need I say more?
Golf most of the times is an exercise in trying to be a good husband to a western woman. Let me explain a little.
When a man tee's off he puts the ball on a tee in the grass. He tries to select the perfect spot on the mound, he tries to place the ball at the perfect height. The the man squares himself to be in perfect alignment to the ball to maximize the best hit possible. The golfer make a few practice swings. If it feels right he moves up a few inches and swings at the ball. In the golfers mind he see's a perfect connection with the ball and listens for that ping. He visualizes taking a beautiful arc up in the air about 100 - 200 feet and making a perfect land in the center of the fairway 250 - 300 yards up.
Unfortunately when he hits the ball instead of hearing the ping he hears a crashing thud, the ball shoots off to the left, called a hook, heading for dense woods. It rises above the trees the drops and disappears behind the trees. After looking for 15 minutes you find your ball close to 100 others somewhat buried in a small patch of dirt with grass up to 3 feet tall and a 5 foot tree stump inline with the green.
Now: Talking to a western woman. You know what you want to say to her, you've crafted the words in your mind for hours, you find the perfect moment, in the perfect place. You take a couple of practice comments at it and the tell her what was on your mind. You think it will sail perfectly to her ears but when you speak it to her it doesn't sound exactly right and it gets twisted somewhere between your mouth and her ears. The she misunderstands what you are trying to say because after all you aren't prince charming and gets very angry with you.
So you see golf is the perfect game to practice before you talk with a western woman.
You know come to think of it this happens with a Chinese woman too when you sing translators. Example: You ask your lovely wife to give the dog a bath. You type it into your trusty translator. She reads; Would you lick a live pig?
Willy. Are you kidding me? Golf is from Scotland? No wonder the sport is so aggravating.
