Okay, here is another update.
We spent 12 hours on the train to Tianjin. There was some confusion about where our beds were, but candy managed to get some beds in the carriage that the railway workers use. We thought we had the carriage to ourselves, but it slowly filled up as the night went on. The trip was fine. Tianjin was still surprisingly cold when we arrived at 7 am the next morning.
I thought I would be smart and book and pay for a room in the Ibis Hotel. But we ended up at an Ibis hotel closer to the train station. So after much frustration to ensure that I was not paying twice, we secured a room at this Ibis hotel. A manager who could speak English mysteriously appeared at the last minute to explain that, yes, my booking had been cancelled and my Visa card would not be debited. It is easy to feel pretty helpless in China when no one can explain what is really transpiring.
They let us in the room before twelve, which was really good of them. The room was bigger than I am used to in most Ibis hotels. That aftyernoon we went to a famous restaurant called Goubuli Baozi, where trhey serve individual steamed buns. Well, the food was very good, but the bill was hefty. We paid 360 yuan ( AU$60 ) for the two of us. We also had a honey and lemon drink which was very nice, as well as a Chicken and walnut soy dish which we could have done without.
Anyway, we had a nice day of window shopping and strolling.
The next day we did an organised on Tianjin. We went to a ceramic pottery museum, where a Chinese national has decorated the whole Italian style building with expensive China vases. He also has a collection of antique furniture inside. We also went to the home of the last Emporer who took refuge in Tianjin. The place has been completely restored. It was a bitterly cold day outside. We had to endure time waiting on a dock for a cruise. Ther best part of the tour was the massive Ferris wheel. It felt so much safer than the one I endangered my life on in Shenyang.
The next day I decided we should plan our own tour, so I got on the internet and looked for tourist sites in Tianjin. I would recommend this idea, and give organised tours the flick. It is cheaper and you are not forced through the shops to buy stuff you don't want. I told Candy that we would be herded through places we did not want to go.
So the next day we went to some huge markets, and also some genuine Chinese craft markets. We also visited a Buddhist Temple. We had a great day, and Candy had her arms loaded up with some bargains. I had a nice time buying some things for her home. We were pleased with ourselves that we had organised our own tour, and had fun doing some retail therapy.
I had reached a crises point with Candys' behaviour during our first day in Tianjin. I told her I could not tolerate her immature behaviour, and her vanity. Maybe I was stressed, but I had to confront these issues with her. I felt that, because of her flippant attitude, she prevented us from being close and intimate. I also felt that she can be inconsiderate and insensitive. It has been difficult for her to acknowledge that her attitude is inconsiderate.
Anyway, I told her that I did not want to be with her if she could not see how her attitude affected me. It felt like a turning point for me. As much as I liked her and wanted to be with her, I was willing to walk away from the relationship.
I have really wrestled with accepting some of her behaviour. I think she was always the joker in the family, and a bit of a demon. Sometimes she does not know when to stop. But I have tried to point out her behaviour as it has come up. So it has not all been smooth sailing.
With all that said, we connect well and have an understanding of each other. Some days can be wonderful and fulfilling. Other times I feel that she lacks awareness.
Now, you may be thinking that we were a bit wobbly together, but I have let things percolate and looked at things from a bigger perspective.
On the way back in the train, both of us were in the top bunks exchanging things on the translator. She was learning some English, and I was at the point of committing myself to this woman. I punched in the words, 'Will you marry me', two times on the translator, before I finally handed it to her. She responded in the affirmative. I was monitoring my heart rate, and everything seemed normal. So I asked her if she would like to see her engagement ring.
To be continued
