Sa jiao

[Peter Arnold]

Okay guys, I want to know if any other men have experienced this phenomenon called sa jiao, which to me seems like a selfish, childish behavior disguised as an attempt to get what they want emotionally. This is something which I do not understand. Have any other men had to deal with this cultural phenomena.

[Pineau]

 Could have under a different scenario . A little more information please. All women have their tactics for manipulating . I assume your talking about a woman here?

[Robertt S]

Okay guys, I want to know if any other men have experienced this phenomenon called sa jiao, which to me seems like a selfish, childish behavior disguised as an attempt to get what they want emotionally. This is something which I do not understand. Have any other men had to deal with this cultural phenomena.

Here is an article that may help you!             http://www.therealtaiwan.com/culture-shock-women/1619

[Neil]

That's a good quote: I am not trying to put you off dating Taiwanese girls, just expect to behave like a ‘man’ if you want to be treated like one. 

It's an interesting article, and reminds me that I may have experienced that aspect of Asian women once or twice, from my wife as well. 

[Peter Arnold]

From what I have read from other mens experience on another website, and the meaning of the phrase, it is when the woman acts childish around her mate to make him feel more masculine. It seems like a strange cultural phenomena to pass on to women so that men can feel superior. It certainly doesn't do anything for me.  Have a look at this site on the subject
http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?/topic/26915-sa-jiao/

[Martin]

First off...Peter, nice to see you here.  I didn't know about this, but it might explain an awful lot in my personal experiences.

[shaun]

I was just doing some general reading.  Dang!!! I wish I had seen this thread before.  It explains a lot and makes a lot of sense.

[IrishGuy65]

Just another interesting take on this:
https://yoyochinese.com/blog/learn-Mandarin-Chinese-whiny-but-equal-tantrums-sajiao-chinese-feminism-gender-roles

[shaun]

(I was about half asleep when I initially wrote this so I'll try to make a little sense of it now.)

I was talking about Sa Jiao with a  local man who has a 30 year old Chinese wife.  She is already in America.   He was laughing and saying that it is true.  He went on to say that it gets worse.  He said that Chinese women also want to check into hospitals if anything is wrong even minor illnesses.  He told me that his wife had a difficult time of the month and checked herself into the hospital to make sure everything is OK.

When her husband told her that she needed to get off the bed and out of the hospital she became enraged because of his insensitivity. Turns out that she really didn't have a problem other than an acute PMS cycle.   So he tells me that about twice a year she hibernates in the bedroom and sulks until it is over.

I did tell him that he needed to be glad that he didn't have to wad up a pack of Kleenex between his legs and keep it there for a week out of every month.  He said Amen to that.

His observations are interesting to me.  He lived in China for 3 years as a English teaching coordinator for several schools.  Back home now, he is a high school teacher.   Literature and History are his subjects.

[Arnold]

I don't want to brag here, but my LaoPo is none of this... the only thing (which I find funny) is when I get a little cut (like on hand due to work) she runs after me with the box of Band-aids. By the time she catches me, the bleeding has already stopped.