China Trip 5.0

[Willy The Londoner]

    Henry be careful what you wish for.    (meeting willy) 

That is a bit harsh for someone to say who I have not met.

Willy

[Willy The Londoner]

What you have to be careful of is meeting a lady who has had the experience of being involved with a foreigner who has already had several wives sometimes 4 or 5 in some cases.  She can be very insistence on sorting out money matters at an early stage. Its a case of twice bitten three times shy so money matters can come to the fore very soon.

From what I hear it is usually only the very young are likely to get involved with one who has that sort of matrimonial history as they figure they may as well make hay while the sun shines.  As we know a Chinese woman is quite adapt at telling men what they think they want to know rather than what they should know.

Willy

[Henry]

Thanks ChinaBound, thanks Willy...
these are good to know, and be prepared for.

Is it OK to suggest the lady to take you to her house? Is there a social etiquette for asking or implying that I would be interested to see where and how she lives. There's lots to learn about a person from their habitats and life styles...

[David E]

Thanks ChinaBound, thanks Willy...
these are good to know, and be prepared for.

Is it OK to suggest the lady to take you to her house? Is there a social etiquette for asking or implying that I would be interested to see where and how she lives. There's lots to learn about a person from their habitats and life styles...

Henry

When you meet, and spend a bit of time together, she will almost certainly want you to meet her family...so that they can tell her if they approve of you...especially Mum !!! So you will surely get to see where her family lives. As for her own place (if she does not live at home) then tread softly. Face is a VITAL part of her internal make-up and she will be very cautious of doing anything that may put her at a disadvantage, especially if she lives in a small apartment. Time and patience is best. She will eventually trust you and your intentions and make you welcome in her own home....but take it easy, dont push too hard.

[Henry]

Thanks David...

very important to keep the good intentions flow naturally, and avoid misunderstandings... I guess it's safer for me to invite her stay in my house when she visits the States.

[Willy The Londoner]

Just go with the flow Henry. When she feels the time is right she will open her life up to you. As David E said many may be living away from their home for work purposes and the place where she is temporary living could well be of a lower standard than what she has at her family home.
Also many people working a long way from home will be living in dormitory style accommodation or shared apartments provided by the employer and visiting these may well be a no no.

By the time she is able to obtain a visa to visit the USA that will be some time ahead and you both will have a lot of hurdles to cross so in the meantime you will have got closer if still together. If she can get a visa to visit then living at your house will give her a better idea of what life could be like in the USA.

Willy