Met her family today

[Smashinz]

    Today she invited me to meet her family: Her Father, her Mother, her sister, and her sister's son. This was a major event in our relationship, and it was wonderful. They were all so friendly and nice; I felt as if I was with my own family members. They were all so accepting and sweet to me. They all made me feel like I was part of their family. This is such a huge deal for me, as an American, because before meeting my Chinese girlfriend, I had NO IDEA that such an absolutely wonderful woman existed on this planet!  You know, a common American saying is this: "if it's too good to be true, then it's probably not true". But I am telling you this now, that if you find a wonderful Asian woman, then the previous statement "too good to be true" is false, because yes indeed, it's true!! And I am living it right now. And it's wonderful beyond explanation in words.

[RobertBfrom aust]

That is great news , enjoy , regards Sujuan and Robert .

[john1964]

I must admit that when i first met my wife's family it was a very daunting experience, I got the third degree off of all of them but things turned out for the best, Every time from then when i returned to China things were a little easier, Getting accepted by the family was difficult but now they all welcome me with happy faces, I have just returned from my 7th or 8th trip to China and this time was by far the best, The whole family communicate more to me including the Aunts Uncles nephews, My wife is from a small rural village where they do not see many westerners, So when i am at the family home there are many visits from the neighbours just to see me  , My nephews school mates also come around at lunch time to talk and practice their English, To be welcomed by all of these people is a great experience, John.

[Smashinz]

Chinabound, I completely agree with you on this topic. My girlfriend has been in the U.S. for the past two years, on a student visa, so we have had a lot of time together to get to know each other very well. Fortunately, her culture pretty much requires a lengthy courtship period, precisely to avoid the problems you mentioned (failed relationship).
    Neither myself, nor my Chinese girlfriend, have found the cultural differences to be a problem. In fact, quite the opposite, these differences have been a great point of interest, and learning, for us both. I am fascinated by her culture, as she is mine.
    But all of these things being considered, we are both people, and we both love each other, and we both have the same life goals. So, all is very, very well with us.
   

L.

Dallas, Tx.

[Smashinz]

To: RobertBfrom Aust.......and John 1964;
       
      Thank you so much for replying. I am so excited about my girlfriend, and she is so excited also about me. We have been dating for a long time now, and we are planning to be married later this year. I had no idea such a woman could ever exist in this world. It is truly beyond words, how to express this type of thing? Our relationship has continued to grow as time has progressed, and we are both looking forward to a wonderful marriage and life together.
      It is so great to have found this community. . I plan to remain a member here and eventually post some photos (as yall have).

L.

Dallas, Tx.

[brett]

I met Miss Woo's family and thought it went well but apparently I did a few bad things. Probably my bank account didn't have enough zeros or my house didn't have a swimming pool.

Mama Woo's cooking was sensational and I wonder if I'll be able to sneak back while her daughter is in the USA

Still, it's much easier now I'm here and have much more than just one week to get to know my lady.

The cultural differences are vast though, as demonstrated by my taking a girl to a Hunan restaurant a couple of months ago. She ordered fish soup. She expertly sucked the meat off the bowl of bones, I gutted the inside of my mouth on a piece of fish that had a couple of dozen bones sticking out of it from all directions. Actually if I didn't know any better I'd say the restaurant staff ate the best bits of the fish and gave us the rest.

And just lately I've been offending people by not drinking cups of water given to me in offices - well eventually I'll know the Mandarin for "only Chinese people drink hot water".

[shaun]

Brett, I'm intending to be rude but you really need to get over Miss Woo.  It really isn't fair to the next woman you intend to marry.

[Willy The Londoner]

Not sure you are correct Shaun.

It could be that he is WOO-ing so many lady's so maybe he is correct in mentioning Miss Woo as he cannot remember all their names.

Having met up with Brett I am surprised he has not been snapped up already.

Willy

[Smashinz]

To: Willy the Londoner,

I am beginning to notice, from reading some of the posts of the other people, that many of the people do not understand the value of the Asian woman and her culture. I am observing various complaints and fixations upon superficial things. Perhaps such superficial ideas are a result of the western culture. In any case, it is quite clear to me, that some of the people here do not actually love their Asian woman, because if they truly did love her, they would be willing to sacrifice anything in order to know and understand her, and her family, and her culture, deeply. I think these things are of vital importance, if you truly love her and want to marry her and give her the best life possible.
    On a brighter note, my wonderful girl is returning to my country next week. We talk about marriage, children, family, and our life together, and all the wonderful things we plan to do together. We have also discussed in depth, our roles and commitment to the relationship. It is such a wonderful thing, when you are finally lead to the right person who completes you, as a person.

L.
Dallas, Tx.

[fivetrout]

Smashinz, don't get your panties in a wad! You clearly have ms-informed yourself. The men here are willing to travel the earth for these ladies. Time to time we laugh with them, not at them. Nice for you having found your own.

Chris

[Jason B]

I am a little confused (well a lot but that is another story), in your original post you said that she invited you to meet her family and then in your last post you said that she was returning to your country next week.  Does this mean that you have only met the family via Skype or QQ or some other video chat?  There is a big difference between meeting the family on a social media site and meeting face to face where it is real time.  Time to put my Willy hat on; you will need to find out how she brought the subject up with her parents, is this the friend from school or my partner/boyfriend?  This is a big difference in Chinese culture, her family maybe under the wrong illusion about the whole situation.  I know of one situation where a Chinese student has been here studying with a laowei boyfriend and the parents did not know and after a video chat the relationship was exposed and the parents put an end to it.  Just curious is all, good luck to you and your girlfriend with your future plans.

[brett]

Oh I'm definitely over Miss Woo, although I yearn to find somebody who was as fun as she was. I think Miss Huang fits the bill, plus she's a lot more attractive  . She is doing a great job of displacing all previous ladies from my thoughts. The first date was very successful considering she kept me waiting for 2 hours in 35C heat. Although I know from my dating history that being kept waiting is actually a very good sign  .

I've met so many fabulous ladies here. Like Miss Wang (1) who I have to thank for originally showing me round what is now my home neighborhood in Guangzhou. And Miss Wang (2) - who kept me waiting 2 hours while she dried her hair! Again she was also well worth the wait.

The nice thing about actually being here is that there's a lot less heartache. If things go well I can spend every effort wooing them, and if things go wrong then I can meet another lady in a couple of days. And it's easier on the ladies as well. So much better than going back home and waiting 6 months for the next visit.

And to Smashinz, well I'm living in China but I can't say I'm much closer to understanding Chinese people. Ah, there's just so much strangeness here  .

[Willy The Londoner]

I have no idea why the last post from Smashinz was aimed at me. Maybe if I could understand the big words then maybe I would know why.
So maybe he can tell me why?

If he was refering to a post I made concerning Brett the maybe he should know that Brett and I are friends and he is invited to stay at my home here in Zhongshan at any time.

Willy

[Willy The Londoner]

Yes I was unsure. So what do I know of words that say a lot but mean nothing to me! Whether it was complementary or flattering I know not.

I think maybe we have a young man who has met a Chinese Girl in the USA and has been smitten.  If that is the case then he is a lucky man.

If he has not joined her in a trip to China yet then he has a few eyeopeners to come. With China, outside of the tourist locations, you either love it or loathe it. There does not appear to be any half way point. 

To find love anywhere is a blessing but to find true love and to live in the place you both love then what more can you want.  For me that person is my Chinese Wife and that place is China.  I now have an extended family of step children, sisters, grandparent, cousins, nieces and nephews and even more great nephews and nieces.   Hence my happiness in China and I look forward to getting my 5 year visa and a party card and living my final years here.

Willy

[David E]

To: Willy the Londoner,

I am beginning to notice, from reading some of the posts of the other people, that many of the people do not understand the value of the Asian woman and her culture. I am observing various complaints and fixations upon superficial things. Perhaps such superficial ideas are a result of the western culture. In any case, it is quite clear to me, that some of the people here do not actually love their Asian woman, because if they truly did love her, they would be willing to sacrifice anything in order to know and understand her, and her family, and her culture, deeply. I think these things are of vital importance, if you truly love her and want to marry her and give her the best life possible.
    On a brighter note, my wonderful girl is returning to my country next week. We talk about marriage, children, family, and our life together, and all the wonderful things we plan to do together. We have also discussed in depth, our roles and commitment to the relationship. It is such a wonderful thing, when you are finally lead to the right person who completes you, as a person.

L.
Dallas, Tx.

Have you got the temerity to actually imply that I dont really love my Chinese wife.....and that many others on this site are in the same category.....

That is the biggest load of crap that has ever been posted here and believe me, we have seen some crap over a long time.

I, and many others have forgotten more about Chinese culture than you will ever understand, we have made numerous visits to China, lived the local life, lived with our "new" families, bust our guts to try to understand what the differences are between us and agonised over how to bridge the gaps. We have jumped through endless beaurocratic hoops at enormous cost, both financial and emotional to ensure that we can spend the rest of our lives with our loved one. We have done everything in our power to ensure that she has the ability to preserve and maintain her long held Chinese culture and at the same time been totally committed with help and guidance to assist with her integration in a new and strange Country.

We do this openly and willingly because we love our partners...without reservation and without limits....and in return we get the love and loyalty and sweetness that only a Chinese Woman can do !!!

Dont you dare imply that this is all false.......you just dont have the right or experience to mouth off such bullshit.