Talking to a lady who knows very little english.

[Jay W]

Gentlemen:

It's has been a while since I wrote an update.  As I mentioned in another thread the father of my lady  had a recurrence of a stroke and is functioning at a 3 year old level.  That was over a month ago.  I have been patient, and not have forced the direct communication plan I had worked out with her before the incident.

In the interim, I have sent e-mail and a QQ request to her.  She has now started a new business (selling computer software) and claims her e-mail and QQ account were hacked.  I sent another e-mail to a new address and an EMF.  The EMF made no reference to the new e-mail I sent even though I made mention of it in my EMF.  I am also confused about this new job since she doesn't have any education in the computer software field (she was a hair dresser).  I have a feeling this business is some Amway-esque scheme.

I have the feeling I am getting the end-around.  It's been three EMFs since getting her new e-mail and no mention has been made.  Her letters get more generic and detached.

I want to be the good guy and stick it out given the situation, but I am on the precipice of deciding that it is more advantageous to just move on.  Our connection has just fizzled.  I am waiting until the weekend before I make my firm decision.  Thoughts?

[Arnold]

Jay , you done your part already . I agree with Mike on this , let it go and find yourself another Woman . You can keep in contact with her only to be a friend and be supportive to her because of her Dad . You don't want to come out , looking cold in her eyes . But move on . Don't take it any deeper .. you might like it even less down the Road .

[maxx]

Jay yes move on it has lost its spark.There is like 6,000 other women waiting to talk to you.So why waste your time on this one.I didn't work out nothing else needs to be done on your part.

[Spruik]

Jamesm_406,

Private emails can also be scammed. I was scammed with normal messages as well as "private emails" for 5 months, which later turned out to have been written by agency staff on the agency's office network (not always on the same computer). Having re-read and carefully analyzed all communication, I have to admit it was brilliant although with hindsight I could have observed small red flags.

Then I wasted a trip to China only to meet an imposter. Because the girl depicted in the profile got married well before I started writing to her, she was substituted with someone else.

On free sites I might expect scamming. NOT ON A SITE LIKE THIS WHERE WE ALL PAY REAL MONEY.
Toon.

[Arnold]

Toon ... how that makes me think ... What if that happened to Me ? Even though I'm done searching , this just runs through your Mind , knowing how different my whole Life could have been , have I got a hold of a BAD translator or Agency . When People say ... Your Lucky ! Their are so right , not just because the Wife I found , but how I found her . I consider myself very Lucky in more than a few way's .

[Spruik]

Arnold,

In normal life it takes a good deal of understanding to build up and maintain a good relationship. Note: Good communication is the key.

If our lady does not even speak our language, you get to know each other slowly and much later, with many frustrations on the way. Doesn't help at all. But where is that good communication? You won't have your (human) translator in everyday life.

Physical beauty is very nice indeed, and essential for the human race to procreate... but the language barrier scares me. Here you certainly do need some luck as well.

Toon

[maxx]

Toon I know your going to find this hard to beleave.But the Language barrier does help.The reason it helps is because you are paying attention to what the women is trying to say to you.Ans she is trying to understand what you are saying.

Good communication and commitment on both sides.Is the key to making this work.If you and your lady don't speak the same launguge what do you do? You put some effort and some hard work into it.

[Spruik]

Agreed, but I always listen carefully anyway. If anything is not clear, I ask for clarification. And vice versa.

I spent a few days with a Chinese girl some years ago, and again last month (one week in China without love interpretors mostly), and it was hard, and I am a very patient person.

Of course, where there is love and committment, it can be overcome.