Chinese women and rejection....

[Brian Mc]

Greetings everyone,
No this is not a tale of woe specifically rather an observation on how these wonderful beautiful chinese ladies handle being told they are not the one.

When I first started on CHNlove I was like a kid in a candy store.  So many beautiful women looking for a husband it blew me away.  Anyway I selected a bunch of favourites as the website suggested and being the total newb that I was didnt realize this would bring a flood of admirer mails.  SO all these lovely ladies started sending the admirer mails plus I sent 3 cupid notes as well.

I was totally stunned at the response I have to say.  I selected 4 to write an emf to and figured I would go from there.

Well at this same time that the emf replies started to come in I found my ladies profile.  She totally captured me such that I had to add her and send an emf.  Yes thats right now there were 5.  Anyway long story short she became quite quickly the one for me.  So I had a painfull duty now to write to the others and tell them the news.  Well the reply emf's from them really opened my eyes to the courage and thought processes of these truely remarkable women.

Every single one that I had to reject sent a reply saying that tho they were sad that they were not the one , all of them wished me good fortune with my chosen and that they all wished to remain as friends.  Now somebody , I dare you tell me this would ever have happened in the western world.  As soon as any of them here found out about the others every one would have you killed on sight!!

These wonderfull Chinese women every one wished me joy and happiness and friendship.  They even thanked me for writing such nice letters to them and for my kind words.  I will admit right here and now that I had tears in my eyes reading these letters.  Never in my life have I seen such loyalty and respect and happiness from  someone who just got rejected.

Anyway one of these women especially touched me with her offers to help me with any cultural issues that may arise with my lady and she offered advice to me about the importance of family in china etc.  A truly remarkable woman.  Unfortunately she also had about 5 letters from some other guy who told her they had to switch to private emails because emf's cost to much.  Damn what a jerk!!  Anyway I guess its all good because I think things would not have progressed well so she is well rid of him.

Ok so here is the pitch as it were.... If anyone is interested in a beautiful woman with a great heart 47 yrs old, please send me a pm and I will give you her profile number.  It would be so nice if I could play matchmaker and set up a meet with one of the brothers here.  Someone who knows how to treat a lady, especially one who is becoming a friend to me.

Anyway I hope I am not out of line here, I would just like to do something nice for her  she deserves it I think.

Regards to all

Brian

[Jadams79]

It is much more difficult in person........ Chinese girl not quite as nice as a letter hehe...

[David5o]

Jadams79,

I've been trying to point out that sort of thing for sometime now, but most are caught up in the utopia of their new love's,, and common sense seems to just get tossed to one side. ...hahaha!!
They can't seem to accept the fact, that nothing is certain until they meet this new love in person, and even then, you can say the relationship (if any) is only just begining!!
Trouble is, those that have been lucky here, have encouraged others to follow there example, and that's where their luck run's out, so to speak!!

At the end of the day, you can only try and make these guy's "Aware" that things, are not always as they seem, or as they see it....

David.....

[China Shark]

Welcome to our world brother, in the beginning I think that is the hardest figuiring this thing out. But like one of the members stated nothing is for sure until the actual physical meeting. Try to take it slow always have contigency plans. Letters are great yet they are just that words. Remember actions always speak louder than words. Hope I'm being overly cynical and you have this situation locked. I'm just evaluating from my own personal and others since I started my quest. For me I eventually gave up on Chnlove but found a beautiful woman right in one of my classes. It can work yet don't build up expectation so high that you lose track of what's really. Either way I'm sure you eventually find that diamond in the rough. The eye candy at first can be distracting and lead you to make unwise decisions. Keep in mind how the woman might view age, looks, baldness, weight. Because they are seeking a western man doesn't mean they'll settle for anyone. Be objective and you'll never go wrong.
China Shark Mike

[Danny]

Trouble is, those that have been lucky here, have encouraged others to follow there example, and that's where their luck run's out, so to speak!!

It's hard to know, in my humble opinion, what's the right thing here.

If you were being sensible about the whole matter, finding someone in your own city, from your own background, is a whole lot easier.

But if what is real for you is a dream, then maybe that's the way to go for you.

Dreams have the ability to transform reality.

I am thinking of the passion it takes to become a wonderful musician, or dancer, or marathon runner.

I play the piano, so I know a little about what it takes to play that well, how long it takes, the discipline and loneliness of practice.

If you thought about all the suffering you go through to accomplish any of these things, maybe you wouldn't choose to do it, or maybe you would.

If it doesn't work out, that's okay, that's always a possibility.

I am not sure how much is just luck. There's pleasure there, but I reckon a lot of it is a willingness to learn, hard work, commitment, those sort of things.

[David5o]

It's hard to know, in my humble opinion, what's the right thing here.

If you were being sensible about the whole matter, finding someone in your own city, from your own background, is a whole lot easier.

But if what is real for you is a dream, then maybe that's the way to go for you.

Dreams have the ability to transform reality.

I am thinking of the passion it takes to become a wonderful musician, or dancer, or marathon runner.

I play the piano, so I know a little about what it takes to play that well, how long it takes, the discipline and loneliness of practice.

If you thought about all the suffering you go through to accomplish any of these things, maybe you wouldn't choose to do it, or maybe you would.

If it doesn't work out, that's okay, that's always a possibility.
I am not sure how much is just luck. There's pleasure there, but I reckon a lot of it is a willingness to learn, hard work, commitment, those sort of things.



Danny,

I couldn't agree more with you! ...The more you both put into the relationship, the more you have between you. The more you have between you, the better your chances of having that lasting relationship, that we all crave for here.

David.....