Operation Chongqing

[Irishman]

I agree Arnold, Sylvain, its must have seemed like a roller coaster ride of a trip and over so soon.

Whatever happens in the future the brothers here have your back, take a few days to get back to normal life, then I'd suggest rereading your trip reports from when you were there. You are back home now, no time constraints, you need our advice or opinions (and everyone has an opinion on everything!) we will be here for you.

[Skip]

Yes Arnold you are correct.  

However, I responded in the fashion I would expect from those who would follow my future dilemma.  To me, and maybe I would like to be considered the king of the phrase, I believe in "taking the meat and tossing the bones".  That includes what I had to say.  We all have a means of theologizing our temperments.  In other words, we can explain our behavior in a way that makes us comfortable.  

As I said in my earlier post:  Sylvain is a smart guy.  Only he can be responsible for his decisions.  Including further hurt to his well being.  I think an honest response is appropriate.  No advise, just straight talk.  What ever decision he makes will be his.  It's like being the POTUS.  I believe, if I am a worthwhile member of this group, I owe that to him.  

I am so grateful for this site.  For me, if I find myself faced with the same confusion because of the relationship I am building, I want everyone to give me the straightest response they can muster.  Then it will be me who makes the decision.  And, it sits squarely on my shoulders.

[Arnold]

Skip , I was only thinking that in a way we are making it harder for him , if we throw too much his way . Even meant to help him . We ourselves could go on and on about his Trip , knowing that he is also reading all our suggestions . After a while it will not help him but only confuse him more , to a point where he is ready to throw in the Towel , instead having time off to sort it all out by himself and make a decision based on his experience and our input's that he has already . Going back to work with just one day's rest after such an ordeal , he needs to be alone for a while . Unless he looks us up again for further answer's .

[Norb Smith]

Arnold, I have to agree with you that Sylain needs quiet time now that he is home, and must say that he handled himself wonderfully while he was in China with all that taking place, I am sure when the time comes and he is refreshed from the trip and has time to contemplate on everything he will make the right decisions, and we also have to give him time to mend a bit of a crimpled heart, cant say that it has been broken yet, but his healing time will be determined on his thoughts at the present time, but also must agree that when help is asked for sometimes that the answers seem to be a bit creul but some times the truth hurts, I do believe however that his lady should have informed her parents much sooner then she did and maybe some of this wouldnt have happened,,,,,,,,,,,,,but this is just my 2 cents worth

[Peter]

What ever your decisions are it is only you that have to live with it.. Take your time Sylvain and think it over more than once before you decide..

[maxx]

Peter good job simple and straight to the point.

[Sylvain D]

Day by day, I'm askin' myself many questions...

Firstly, Ting said to me via EMF's that she didn't have any webcam.
When I was at Chongqing, by a misunderstanding, I could get her "private" QQ ID', and saw that in fact, she had a webcam, too.
Did she care about something from me to not say directly "I have one but I don't want to use it with you right now??" => I still don't know.

Secondly, I have no more news from her since 2 - 3 days. Not a simple word to say "have a good flight" or anything else. Just nothing...
Maybe is it just a way to say that she doesn't want to hear about me anymore ..

Thirdly, I still don't understand why I've never been told about her boyfriend.

Fourtly,  I've checked our EMF's, and we have written to each other more than 220 EMF's...
Should I then tell myself I've just been fooled and abused or so ugly to spend more than 1100 $ for maybe nothing?

Fifthly, I have no more news from the translator, too. I think she cared to see me alone because I was angry when I was in Chongqing, Ting told me that she would see me the next day, but she never came, nor that nobody called me to say it...

Right now, I'm in France.
I just realize I have some good and some bad memories about my trip. I just don't know what to think about Ting...
I wrote to her sister, asking for explanations.
I wrote a simple Emf once again via Chnlove (because I have a few credits to use), just to see how she would react.
I wrote her a mail, too, saying I was well arrived in France and saying about my travel and experience...

I think that I did my best to try to understand many things...
Now, I know I have no way to wait any longer than this week to have any replies from her...
If she would not reply, I then will post to Chnlove and say about my story, how I've been fooled since many months, how the feelings were abused because I was written that Ting loved me but in real, it was not that at all...
And that their services are quite very bad, because if they say that they check if the ladies are free and so on... why did I have to go in China, and hearing that Ting has a chinese boyfriend who wants to marry her??

I think you will easily understand that I can be angry,  anxious and sad, too, for many things.
If I have lived some nice experiences with people over there, about Ting, there still are right now some questions which are not solved but which need to be solved very quickly...

[Tiztom]

Yes I've heard all the looking after & supporting the brotherhood, maybe you should all grow some balls and start standing up like real men instead of trying to cover everything in cotton wool.

[Rhonald]

Yes I've heard all the looking after & supporting the brotherhood, maybe you should all grow some balls and start standing up like real men instead of trying to cover everything in cotton wool.

Just wondering, are Neanderthals real men?Sorry Guys, I responded non constructively to a posting I viewed non constructive, but rather destructive.

[Vince G]

You have much to think about. You and only you can make up your mind to continue or not with her. But PLEASE, do not think it is a fault of yours. It is not. I do not know her game? but it is her playing a game. Now you make your rules for the game.

[Sylvain D]

'just wanna think that it can't be like that.., hoping I haven't been fooled...
Anyway, if Chnlove then really abused about the emf's letters, is there any way to find a solution to the problem I met?
I mean, can't I get some free credits or money from the agency who just lied to me about Ting's feelings and so on???

My head's gonna explode, there are too many questions...

[Rhonald]

'just wanna think that it can't be like that.., hoping I haven't been fooled...
Anyway, if Chnlove then really abused about the emf's letters, is there any way to find a solution to the problem I met?
I mean, can't I get some free credits or money from the agency who just lied to me about Ting's feelings and so on???

My head's gonna explode, there are too many questions...

Sylvain, what can I say?
Sorry it happened, sometimes adventure is not all about good times. You impressed me with how you carried yourself.  D'Artagnan would have been proud.

[Vince G]

Write to Chnlove and tell them just as you had here that she was to be a free woman and she is not. They may offer something? Maybe all? Maybe some? But it's good to write to tell them the truth.

[Chong]

Give it another 24 hours rule. Last chance for her. Do your due dilligence next ... Fill in the "Visiting Ratings" Report for her and the agency. Then contact Customer Service.

[Sylvain D]

I think I should first wait to have more fresh news from Ting and her sister before writting to Chnlove and explain all my story there.
"Maybe" would Ting really like me, right now, I just need her to really show it to me.
That's why, too, for many reasons, I feel anyway sad, because I don't understand many things...

Who shall I believe? The translator, who said me that Ting was upset concerning me, because of the feelings and the fact she cared about coming in France if we would marry and so many other things?
Do I have to believe her sister who took a lot of her time too, just to talk a lot with me and said me many things?  And who asked me about the wedding and so on, while Ting was just looking at me, sitting next to me??
Do I have to believe Ting finally, when she said she was very busy with her work and could not come to see me?

Without any replies from any of those 3 persons, for sure, it would be very hard to know what to do...
except that I should then write to Chnlove and saying all that happened to me, since the beginning... 'till the end.

I don't know if D'Artagnan would had been proud of me, but, for sure, actually, my heart's lost into a big wave of questions.
I wish that I will have more news in less than 15 hours. It would really be a good "beginning" for better understanding if possible.

Chong, actually, I'm still in contact with Sherry Chu.
She gave me the agency's adress in Chongqin and I said her that I had "met" any problems when I was in Chongqing.
But as I don't know who I shall say it to, I've asked her if I had to say it to her directly or to write to the agency, in Chongqing.
I should have any reply from her tomorrow, I think, so I will see what to do once Ting will have replied to me. Or not.