Operation Chongqing

[metooap]

Sylvain,

I admire your approach!  Wanting to meet her parents really speaks volumes about who you are.

On the Other hand, I always like to ask – why? Why are you in love with Ting? What has she shown you that make you feel the way you do right now? Why do you feel the way you do? In 15, 30, 360 days, will you feel the same way?

What is it about Ting that really make you want to throw down the gauntlet and fight to the end?

In asking why, maybe this will help you clarify some things.

[China Shark]

Sylvain, first I want to apologize for not being there for you earlier in this thread. Too many things on my mind and need time to reflect on my own situation here. Did not have enough time to read all of the posts yet I've skimmed over the important parts. Truth be told I can totally sympathize with your dilemma yet I feel you are waging an uphill battle with Ting. My ex Mei is in the same perdictament that you are in. She is love with the concept of being in love and that is all that matters. She'de be perfectly content if I didn't love her as long as we were together. A relationship consists of mutual feelings, don't dillude yourself into believing that if you fight hard enough you can overcome impossible odds. Honestly I hope I'm wrong and things change for the better. Been around and active on Chnlove, Facebook and this site for 8 months now. With that being said yes I've become quite cynical yet I'm more prepared to deal with these issues. Obssession can be a really bad thing if the situation become fraught with obstacles. Face it all of us on here have compulsive/obssessive personalities. How else can you explain the time, money and heartache we put into this thing of ours. I realize I'm telling what you don't want to hear yet I think it would be best to maybe stop writing to her for a short period and give yourself time to reflect on what has transpired and make a list of pros and cons to further evaluate if it is pheasible in the not too distant future. Your heart is just like the devil, it will tell you if only I do this or that maybe everything will be alright. Her not telling you about the boyfriend tells me she is hedging her bets. Do you want to pardon the expression be sloppy seconds. Time to meet someone that is willing to meet you halfway and wants to give you a real chances. Too many ifs in your current situation to count on success in the future. Whatever happens the brotherhood and I have your back.
China Shark Mike

[Darius]

Hey Sylvian,

it seems you are really into this lady, full of hope and anticipation. As i see it from her letter there could be a faint hope that it goes your way. But you got to think one step ahead of the your lady so dont forget the practical side of the whole story. Loving each other isnt living togather. My lady said once to me our feeling for each other are growing day by day but i want to see if we can live togather too. The (chinese) women think more practically. Try to assure her in every correspondence why she can live with you. Explain to her the full details of how your life would seem togather, so often as you can. One more important thing. You must assure her parents they are not losing her daughter. It wont be in your behalf if the parents think they are losing their both daughters. But as Maxx once said  Do not start something that you are not willing to finish. Your heart is already broken it couldnt be any worse.
With that at the back of your mind you can lose nothing except some more money and three months of your time but gain everything.

[MLM]

Sylvain, all I can say to what you are in to is this, think with your head, feel with your heart, then take what both are telling you and then do what you feel is right for you, and as CH mike said, what ever you decide to do the brotherhood is here for you, good luck friend.

[Sylvain D]

Well.

I still don't know how things gonna turn...
First, I know I'm just tired because whatever I would do, I just can't stop thinking about my trip and about Ting. And it is just enough to full my mind when night is here.
With it, it is quite warm in my studio, about 30° actually... so, not really cool for sleeping. But I do with it.

I have just a very few news from the translator (Sirui), who wrote me that Ting had my mail and replied to it .. But actually, it is night and I still don't have it.. So I wil have to wait for tomorrow to know a bit more what it can deal about and how the situation seems to be...

I don't wanna me any illusion : I did a great trip, I could had stopped just because the language was quite difficult and speaking with Ting too... But I preferred to face it instead than going away. Days went slowly but everytime I saw Ting, I was very happy.
Saying why her and why not anybody else? I don't know. I'm like that, I think. I wanted to speak with her, I just went on talking to her and later, I wished to visit her. Now, I know I would go there again.. even for a week, just to see her, I could do it...
Nobody here can say "tomorrow it will be like that, we'll be always together and so on"... I think it's a part of reality, in fact.
We wish it, we dream it to be like that. No one can say that the other day, for any reason, the situation with the suitable ladies could be very bad... Or not.
However, it is by talking about many things that we can better face any problem, and doing all we can to not have a mountain of it to come later.
I know I want to be with Ting, because she is her... Simply it.
yes, I am exposing myself to many challenges... But in love there are always some challenges to face up. Who could say that love would really be so easy ?
I know I can be silly/crazy/mad sometimes, and other times, I can be anything else, but it's me, I won't change myself
My trip is quite different from what I could think about.
Without you, I don't think I could go there and realize one dream. Just to meet Ting in real.
Maybe did I really touch her heart when leaving Chongqin, maybe not. I need some more proofs from her. I sent a message to her, to her sister and to the translator, where I dealt about writting a letter to Ting's father and mother, and asking for their birthdates and so on.
Right now, I have nothing in return for that. But I can wait 24h to see if I would get any reply. But I just doubt a bit.

Whatever happens, I choosed to live that experience and I'm still in the hole...
And whatever happens, on Saturday or Sunday, I'll go to another step. Whatever it has to be good ... or not.
Let's just see what Ting will write.

By the way, Sherru Chu was pleased to help me and she transfered in fact my request to the agency in Chongqin. In fact, I could have done it when evaluating the translated letters on Chnlove.
I thanked her for her help. So, now I don't know how things will turn out... I just ask to see... and then I will act.

[Vince G]

Yes I know of sleepless nights. To many questions without answers. What did I do right? What did I do wrong? Sometimes the answers come quickly others never answered. Get some rest, it will all work out in time.

[JimB]

Ok, wet blanket here. I have read all of this and enjoyed it. Except for a few posts everyone has been very helpful and full of good advice.  Does it not seem odd to you that when you were there, all you got was the basic, nice guy keep on truckin everything will be good, then maybe not, then maybe good, then maybe not.  3 hours in a couple of days is nothing at all.  I know you want it to be more.   Now that you are home again all of a sudden it is on again?  First from the translator?  I would really question this.  And are they asking for EMF's?  I would not write one more EMF. My stipulation for any further contact would be thru regular e mail or QQ with webcam.   Do not get stuck again with 100 EMF's then just before you go in October, there is a "problem".  Maybe i am reading this wrong.  I hope I am.  But, just be careful brotha.  Like everyone has said, there are a lot more fish in the ocean.  I am sorry but if she is not 100% for me then she is not for me.

Jim

[maxx]

JimB I could not agree with you more.

[Arnold]

Ok, wet blanket here. I have read all of this and enjoyed it. Except for a few posts everyone has been very helpful and full of good advice .Jim

Hey , that felt good on those HOT day's we been having .
Jim , I certainly hope it was not MY few post's , you thought of not being helpful ? Remember ... I have the MAGIC botton and the itchy finger . Haha

You are so right , Sylvain should NOT waste any more Money on EMF's , since Ting's Sister can have E-mail's translated or do it herself . Also , Sylvain should make sure that all this uncertaincy is desolved way before October , his next Trip ( if there will be a next Trip ) ?

[Sylvain D]

I just don't know what to think.
Sirui told me Ting wrote me yesterday, night is gone and I still haven't her letter this morning...
So, I just don't know what she dealt about, in her letter.

By the way, I used another EMF because I want to spend those 2 last credits before using directly Sirui's services.
So, I sent another EMF to Ting, saying I didn't understand many things about her, and that I'd like anyway to know how things are really are with her boyfriend... asking her to be honest with me, nothing else.

I called her sister this morning, she said me that Ting was going to the agency, and that she "talked" or that she had to? do it... She said too that she will mail me, maybe today, maybe tomorrow.

I would say that, whatever happens, I began something by writting Ting, so, I prefer "stayin'" on my position, even if I would have to end it in a few days...
Just have to wait what Ting will really answer me.

Anyway, in less than 72 hours, another step will be reached.
And it will say if yes or no, I'll move in Chongqing on October.

[JimB]

Arnold every one of your posts have the wisdom of a Solomon.  How could you ever think otherwise. ( kiss kiss kiss)

Sylvain brother, I hope everything works out the way you want.  I just do not like to see brothers jerked around and used.  None of us do.

[China Shark]

JimB brown noser.
China Mike

[Sylvain D]

Well..
It's like things are very difficult anyway, as Ting's parents know nothing about France and don't want their daughter to be in a country so far away, just to be "so rich" and anything else like that.

However, I don't give up.
Anyone who could help me to translate in chinese all that, please?

"Please, thanks to read carefuffly.
I would like to write to Ting's parents, so I need their postal adress. I would like to write them to show them (trough the letter) who I am, what is my job, how I met Ting, and what are my feelings for her. I would like to send any pictures, too, and to send any gifts for them. Because I would like them to see that western men are good men, too, and that I don't want to cheat with their daughter.
Many thanks
Sylvain"

Well, I tried with Google Translator and any other translator (electronic) but it is not very good at all.
So, if someone could help?

Many thanks in advance

[China Shark]

Slyvain, I have a few friends that are completely bilingual if you wanted to send to my email I could then have them translate and send back to you. Here is my email seal03@gmail.com  Anyway I could I'll give it a shot for you.
China Shark Mike

[Sylvain D]

Slyvain, I have a few friends that are completely bilingual if you wanted to send to my email I could then have them translate and send back to you. Here is my email seal03@gmail.com  Anyway I could I'll give it a shot for you.
China Shark Mike

You're God
Thanks, i write you quickly
So, I got Ting's letter and she said she quarelled with her parents yesterday, referring me to them. They are upset because they don't want their daughter to leave China for another country, because it is an adventure.
She also says that they are upset about our relationship and that they are very traditional parents.

Well, her sister seems to be a little bit "disappointed" because she says that it is quite difficult to gain their agreement, and that she will do her best to help me, but that I would prepare myself that it could not be ok.

Ting asked me to refer about my future with her, I wrote her again my last credit on Chnlove, just with some questions and answers, like "will she feel lost if she leaves china", "what about her parents", "will she be really happy"... and so on.
I also used a nice chinese sentence : ai de li liang wu xian na.

I also (I'm very crazy....) bought flowers to be delivered to her.
And to her mother, too.
But I don't know what her father could like. well.. maybe some wine? maybe anything else?

I also requested China Shark help for translating a few sentences in chinese
I requested too that Sirui and Ying (Ting's sister), go and speak to Ting's parents, about me, and what they can say about me, even if they saw me for a few times in Chongqing.

I wrote to my contact in Hilton Hotel (in Chongqing) , to know if she may could help me too, in the following days, if I had to request her a "big help".
Because I want to show to Ting and to her family I'm doing all my best to do something.
Just because I wish to be with her.
And I really wish that their parents would give me their agreement.
If they only could let me ONLY one chance.

I'm maybe dumb...
I'm maybe out of control.

Well... I think that, with all of that, I did all my best to show how motivated I am.

O.M.G

I just realize I bought blue roses for her mother...
And I just see what's its meaning...
Eh ! It seems after all that it's quite right.
I wish it could "touch" her and show her how gentle I am.

Just now, I should cross many fingers and so on, and painting all my studio with some "8"