Hah, David, I knew you would be the one to pick up the meaning of what I wrote earlier
, I think you know what that means now
So on Sunday we went to the great wal. Ling had aranged us to be picked up from the hotel at 05:50 in the morning to be taken to the bus to the great wall at Badaling. She got a great price for this cnsidering the distance involved. It was 100RMB al inclusive including lunch..more on that in a bit.
So we got picked up in the car an driven to the bus. There was much consternation there, this apparently was a no laowai bus, Ling didn't know why, outright racism, I dunno, or really care.
On the other bust we were taken to it was all Chinese too but there was no problems at all.
There was a tour give on the bus that did a role call to make sure everyone was onboard several times before setting off, the volume was set to the max and she literally shouted into the mic, I was relieved when the role call was done let me tell you.
So we headed out..and then the auditory assault began, she literally talked at the top of her voice at full volume allllllllll the way to the Great wall, this girl barely paused for breath. Its was constant fast and hell for me as I couldn't understand a word, I was mightily relieved when we arrived and assumed that would be the last of that..how wrong was I..more on that later..
The great wall as Badaling was jammers even at around 8 in the morning when we arrived. It was cloudy and foggy at the top but still steaming hot.
At the bottom of the wall the crowds were jam packed you could barely move. The higher the wall went the thinner the crowds got. In parts it was unbelievably steep. Ling was in medium height heels and it must have been torture on her legs. But she took it slow and said she was going to go a the way to the top with me because I had aid earlier that I really wanted to go all the way there. At the top it was virtually deserted, out of the 1000's that start at the lower levels only the brave few seem to go to the top, probably the heat is a major part of that though. Ling tells me that Badaling is by no means the steepest part of the wall, but she was pleased we got to the top. We got another couple to snap us together there and its a picture I'm very happy with. Once again Ling proved her steel will and commitment to me by going that far.
Going down obviously was a lot easier but jesus the view down the almost vertical drop is not for those afraid of heights, most people clung to the railings and gingerly made their way down one step at a time. Me being full of macho bravado didn't, that was pretty foolish thinking back, if I had slipped and fallen its an almost vertical drop of several hundred feet, I doubt I'd have lived to tell the tale.
So the bust left promptly at 10AM, I though grand we'll be back in Beijing around midday and we can do lunch and head out and do more stuff, Ling said no it would be around 18:00 and we would have lunch first. I needed to go to the toilet and sure as hell didnt want to face the squatter ones at Badaling, the stench in the urinals was bad enough, the squatters must have been nothing short of overpowering. I thought it was a simple misunderstanding and let it slide. It was a misunderstanding alright!!!!
So the tour guide from hell started her sticatto rattling off of fact again as son as the bus started off, I though WTF is she going on about now???!!!
I quickly noticed something was up - we were not headed back the way we came!!, at first I thought it was because of the one way system on the motorway or something, but soon realised it was more than that.
About 2 hours later we arrived at a Pagoda which there was a tour around with a nice display of ancient Jade stuff, that let into a massive jade shop, where there was hard selling going on, I wasn't interested as my bowels were starting to feel a bit gassy to say the least.
After that there was lunch which was part of the deal, so was "free" it was very basic and I didnt eat much, I ordered a beer and got some luke warm watery crap, but at least it was better than the food.
After al that I though great, now to Beijing!!
Wrong!
Next stop was so other food stall place, I wasn't feeling at all interested an neither did most of the rest of the bus. Ling and I dozed togther on the bus instead as we were both pretty short of sleep from the night before.
Next stop was another food place full of dried fruits and candies, there was serious had selling going on a lot of the tour group really went mad spending. I was pretty unimpressed but then again I didn't understand the pitch made in the bus or at the food place either. To my untrained eye the stuff there was no different to what the local Walmart here has. There as bus load after bus load in the place, I guess the tour companies get a kickback for bringing tourists to the place.
Next stop was a Buddhist temple, again there was a tour give with a microphone giving it her all, I was starting to cramp up real bad at this point and was sweating profusely.
Ling noticed and gently pulled me away from the goup and out to the open and we sat by the bus. I decided enough was enough and headed to the WC but the stench there was so bad I almost puked so I had to back out.
I had toilet roll in my bag so decided I would tryt and find an empty field near by and try and it natural discreetly, but as soon as I walked away from the bus the driver shouted and Ling said we were not "permitted" to leave the area.
Eventually we made it back to Beijing (around 18:00 as Ling had said earlier) and as Luck would have it the bus stopped off near the hotel we had stayed and checked out of last night. Ling asked the girl in reception if I could use the bathroom. They said fine and the security guy buzzed me in. Man, it was lift off in the toilets!! The relief was incredible!!! I was so grateful to Ling for taking car of me on the day, the concern on her face was plain to see.
We got the bullet train back to Tianjin and took one of those motorcycle things back to the hotel as none of the taxis would drive us back the short distance. I needed another crap again (my whole system must have backed up during the day!) so we had to get back fast.
We checked in the hotel me almost doubled over in pain again and I hugged Ling briefly and she headed back home as she had work tomorrow and had to pack her bags and stuff first.
Had another Krakatoa type event in the toilet and was fine again.
I headed out and bought a few beers in the local Walmart and sank a few cold ones back in my room. There isn't any bars around here that I can find. There are apparently some bars in Tianjin but they seem to be few and far between.
On Monday the plan is that Ling will stay with me in the hotel as our flight tomorrow morning is at around 8AM and Ling lives about an hours drive from the hotel so makes more sense for her to stay with me, also the price for the room for two as one and of course she is with me.
