Author Topic: My Blog  (Read 24905 times)

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Vince G

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RE: My Blog
« Reply #135 on: August 09, 2009, 10:07:32 am »
Sorry to hear this. I am against sending any money. It's my opinion but if you were married it would be different. As Ed said I don't think she understands the living expenses it takes. She might be taking what you earn as free and clear? Not knowing you have expenses to pay also.

Scottish_Rob

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RE: My Blog
« Reply #136 on: August 09, 2009, 11:20:22 am »
Wo Jo Ma sorry to hera that brother:-/

Offline Neil

  • happily married, working on immigration
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  • Zhangping, Fujian bound.
RE: My Blog
« Reply #137 on: August 09, 2009, 01:17:22 pm »
It's been my experience, and it's easy to say but hard to do...

Women, and I believe it includes Chinese women as well, need a strong man to set boundaries.  I think you really need to explain the finances in detail to her and let her know exactly how much you can afford to send each month and then, here's the hard part, stick to those boundaries, even when she asks for a little more or asks for the money before you are scheduled to send it.  It's not easy to do, God do I know that, but you have to do it out of a calm, respectful mindset.  It isn't easy when there's an emotional, distraught, beautiful girl in front of you, or you are feeling embarrassed or frustrated.  So, take a 24 hour rule, get your numbers down on paper and write her an EMF.  Maybe even put a PS to the translator that this is a serious, important letter and needs to be translated properly with no fluff.  

I really hope this works out for you Josh.  We all really want the best for both of you.  Chin up and good luck buddy.

Neil
...as irresistible as chocolate