Author Topic: Falling In Love !!  (Read 8263 times)

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Offline Rhonald

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #15 on: August 07, 2009, 05:37:56 pm »
Quote from: 'David5o' pid='11556' dateline='1249680858'

They tend to wait until it's too late to do anything about it ..... just you wait and see for yourself later on!!....hahaha!!
David....


So I guess they follow the rule that it is better to ask for forgiveness then to ask for permission.
Life....It's all about finding the Chicks and Balances

David5o

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #16 on: August 07, 2009, 06:46:26 pm »
Rhonald

Rhonald my friend, you have it all to come!!
Remember Scott's epic journey, ....i was laughing to myself reading his story as it unfolded, They just expect you to follow, what they have arranged never thinking about telling you what those arrangements are.

Thank god, that has got sorted out where Lucy is concerned, it really does drive you up the wall, being left in the dark. Especially for someone like me, i Need to know what's going on, i hate having things sprung on me at the last moment..... Grrrrr!!!!   hahaha!!

David.....

Offline David E

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #17 on: August 07, 2009, 06:49:38 pm »
Quote from: 'mpo4747' pid='11483' dateline='1249656812'

So what comes first ....  LOVE or the PHEROMONES


HAHA...pheromones must come first...or you couldnt fall in love :):)

But if your honey floods you with pheromones and you dont send back an equal flood , then you have a problem. But if you both have a good pheromone match....WOOOOOOOOW !!!

Offline MLM

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #18 on: August 07, 2009, 08:21:03 pm »
I am still learning things to do and not do, I remember the first day after she and Lili moved in, Zhou doesn't like drinking of booze, yeah, I had a bottle of 50 year old brandy on a shelve when I went to work and when I got home 10 hours later it was gone, when I looked in the trash there it was, empty, I was thinking, WTH??, and when I askeed her what had happened to it she said that it was not healthy so she got ride of it for me :huh:.
I have learned that if she THINKS it isnt good for you or the family then shut your mouth and smile, you wont win this one.
TIME IS THE TELLER OF ALL TRUTHS AND THE HEALER OF ALL HURTS

Offline maxx

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #19 on: August 07, 2009, 08:36:50 pm »
David yes I probably did gloss over that to quick.I remember the first time I started cleaning the house.My wife stares at me for 5 minutes.Then runs off into the bedroom crying.When I get her calmed down.She tells me that she is a bad wife.Because I Have to help her clean the house.I had to explain to her different country different customs.That I was not thinking about it and I wasn't madd.Because I had to clean the house.

Your lady telling you what they have planned.Was a big big issue with us.She has finnaly learned to tell me what she has planned.

The one that got me was.I was working outside the house.And she wanted to come and help.I wouldn't let her help because she was pregnant and I didn't want her to fall and hurt herself.Of course she didn't listen she came outside 5 minutes latter all bundeld up.And I couldn't talk her into going back into the house.

I finnaly got her to go into the house.And after I finished up.I asked her why.She insisted on helping.She said that in China if the wife didn't help. the husband would be very angry.I asked her even when the wife is pregnant.She said yes.That just blew my mind.I told her latter that it was ok in America she didn't have to help while she was pregnant.

The other wierd one is staying in bed for a month after the baby is born.Not washing your hair for a week after the baby is born.And nothin cold to drink or eat.When it is that time of the month.

David I don't know about you but everyday is still a learning experience for me.

Offline David E

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #20 on: August 08, 2009, 12:13:09 am »
Well, here is the thing..... we are very much in love, and phermones do not travel by way of email letters.... :)

If she floods me with phermones, then I will flood right back .... sparks are going to fly .... is how I would describe it, right now .... but we will see...

Mike

I have puzzled long and hard whether I should reply to your words, and indeed if I should reply at all….because we all have our own views about the quest for a Chinese beloved and we will all make our own way towards this goal.
I briefly aired my previous experience in Chengdu here and was so glad that I was not the only one who had been taken for a ride.

That lady and I shared hundreds of EMF’s, hundreds of private emails, hours and hours on the Web-cam and ditto on phone calls.
By the time I was ready to go to China I was overwhelmed about my feelings for this woman…my life was finally complete, I had found my “Princess” and was totally elated and committed…..and so was she…as I absolutely believed at the time.

From the moment of our meeting I was shocked (understatement) that this woman could turn out to be such an unprincipled, outright B****H. She was a snarly, arrogant , money hungry monster who treated me as an ATM and held all my views and behaviours in total contempt. And I am not a slob, or an animal, I am an very educated, mature, successful and very decent Man…as I am sure you are.
What I learned in the worst possible way is that NOTHING prepares us for an actual meeting and NEVER could I ever again convince myself that I was in love with any woman unless I had met her and slowly let love happen between us…… or not.

I can tell you , my fellow Bro, that I still have pain from that experience and I have only decided to have another try because I have been able to get the whole thing in context and perspective by listening and reading all the great information here. I don’t say for one moment, God forbid , that your Lovely has any intentions to be dishonest with you, or that she doesn’t feel exactly as she says in her words to you.

If you are the lucky one who has got all this love, and future and commitment from a set of non-physical communications, then you are indeed a very lucky man.

But I have only one use to other Bros on this forum and that is to do my damdest to stop anyone finding that the reality blasts the emotional bottom out of your World. And I still say….keep a little lid on emotions, give yourself a bit of protection, don’t leave yourself wide open for a blast.

Written with the very best intentions and concern for all Bros embarking on this difficult, complex, yet potentially life changing journey.

Offline Danny

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #21 on: August 08, 2009, 01:35:54 am »
Quote from: 'David E' pid='11625' dateline='1249704789'

By the time I was ready to go to China I was overwhelmed about my feelings for this woman…my life was finally complete, I had found my “Princess” and was totally elated and committed…..and so was she…as I absolutely believed at the time.



I really appreciate you talking about this experience. That puts your comments here into perspective for me. I think if I had something like that happen to me then I would tell my friends to be careful too. Having read about your experience, it puts what you have written in other places in a different light. What an experience to go through. Thanks for this.

Offline Willy The Londoner

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #22 on: August 08, 2009, 02:00:37 am »
Quote from: 'David5o' pid='11556' dateline='1249680858'

Willy,

If only it were that simple, Believe me it will drive you MAD not knowing what' is going on. eventually you just have to ask!!  haha!!  They tend not to tell you anything that's going on, from making arrangements to go to a friends BBQ, to friends comming round to us. They tend to wait until it's too late to do anything about it ..... just you wait and see for yourself later on!!....hahaha!!

David....



I know exactly what you mean.  Being told at 10.45 that we are meeting someone at 11 for China tea.  Thought that was just my girl!  So now I can let her off what i thought was eccentricity!!!

Willy
Willy The Lpndoner

Now in my 12th year living here,

Offline David E

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #23 on: August 08, 2009, 04:21:32 am »
I really appreciate you talking about this experience. That puts your comments here into perspective for me. I think if I had something like that happen to me then I would tell my friends to be careful too. Having read about your experience, it puts what you have written in other places in a different light. What an experience to go through. Thanks for this.
[/quote]

Danny

Appreciate your words.............................nobody should go through that experience..would not wish it on any Bros. So my quest is to help others to keep it in reality until you are certain about each other....after a face-to-face  !!
Cheers...David E
Bros

And so it begins...again.....

Here is an extract of part of the latest letter I got from "herself"...

"And then i found you , A very special man that showed me what love is really like. You have turned my heart of stone into clay, you have made me believe in true love and made me whole again, you complete my life and make me believe in myself. I think of you always and cannot get you out of my head. I feel my heart beating for you. I can feel my blood running through my veins inspired by your love. You have become a part of me and created my heart. You are the air i breath and the reason i live. You are my Price, I will forever honor you and give you all my love, I will always be loyal to you¡­¡­"

Now, what red-blooded Man, looking for his true love could fail to be moved by such words............but.....who wrote them, what is the real agenda....should cynicism again override such beautiful sentiments...should hormones overtake pheromones....????

Despite all my misgivings, i cant help but get drawn in by such a letter (and that was only part of it)...especially when it comes from someone who I have some good feelings about.

I have NOT talked to her about "love", but I have discussed every other topic under the sun, talked about my life, my family my City, my home, my hopes and my "dreams"...................

HELP............!!!!!

David E
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 05:08:23 am by David E »

Scottish_Rob

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #24 on: August 08, 2009, 07:01:10 am »
David what Danny said about putting your other posts into perspective i can now totally agree...

I am one of those people that fell in 'lust' with an image, however, since getting to know Keren i have fallen in LOVE with her....I am going over with the intention of marrying this lady, but I have made one proviso 'IN MY HEAD', I intent to be prepared for the unexpected, which is why I decided to also teach there, if it goes belly up then I have something to occupy my mind until i am able to get back in the saddle...

What you say does make a lot of sense, but no two people are the same, sometimes you have to make mistakes to grow...

David5o

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #25 on: August 08, 2009, 07:58:05 am »
Maxx,

Yeah, there the sort of things i'm talking about. I think the worst of all, is not knowing the plans she had made, That really bugged me big time!!  ...hahaha!! But now, like yours she has learned to tell me, well in advance.  haha!!

Yes i know what you mean about them wanting to help with, whatever the man is doing, eg building erecting things. I erected a 1.25m high slated fence on top of my boundary wall at the rear of our house, for a bit of privacy around the pool area. She insisted on helping with that, so i let her apply the wood preserver/stain to all the wood, before i started building it. She also helped by holding planks of wood in place while i screwed them to the posts. ...Actually, i really enjoyed the company (and the help) while erecting that fence, wouldn't mind doing it all over again!! ...hahaha!!  In fact I think i used that exercise, to support me helping her in the home, ....if she could help me, then there's no reason why i couldn't help her here and there!!

Haven't experienced the pregnancy/baby thing, and haven't noticed the no cold drinks/food when it's that time of month. The first , because were too old and decrepit to start having children. ..lol!! I wouldn't go as far as saying that it's still an every day learning experience, but things still crop up from time to time. When we look back over some of the things that have happened between us, we look at each other and just burst out laughing. ...But some weren't so funny at the time!! ...haha!!

Maxx,  I'm not sure how many guys on this Forum, now have there wives at home with them. But i think it would be an interesting and informative Thread for the new guys and even more so for the guy's that are married, but are still waiting for there wives Visa to come through..... at least they will have some idea of what awaits them.  ...hahaha!!

As you say, I would do it all over again, without a second thought, for the benefits have always outweighed any difficulties we went through.
I must admit, I've never used these two rules of yours, but i have always used the golden rule, ''Never go to sleep with a cloud hanging over your heads''  And we never have!!
Used that rule all my life as a married man with my late wife, it hasn't failed me/us ...... Not Once!!

David......
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 06:39:27 pm by David5o »

Offline MLM

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #26 on: August 08, 2009, 09:32:28 am »
David, I think thats a great idea, we could give the newbies and those waiting a look at what they may expect after thier wives/girlfriends get here.
TIME IS THE TELLER OF ALL TRUTHS AND THE HEALER OF ALL HURTS

David5o

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #27 on: August 08, 2009, 10:20:50 am »
MM,

Yeah, something to look foreward too ...hahaha!!

David....

Offline MLM

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #28 on: August 08, 2009, 12:06:05 pm »
we'd have to be careful not to scare some of them off LOL.
TIME IS THE TELLER OF ALL TRUTHS AND THE HEALER OF ALL HURTS

David5o

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RE: Falling In Love !!
« Reply #29 on: August 08, 2009, 12:56:59 pm »
MM,

I take it, your wife is pretty much used to Western ways by now. But i guess your not too used to her Chinese ways just yet.   hahaha!!  I wish i could have seen your face when you saw that empty bottle of 50 yr old Brandy.... now i bet that would have made a great picture .....hahaha!!

I'm a bit surprised actually, the chinese look at brandy as a sort of medicine,...... or maybe that's just the Chinese Male population!! ....hahaha

David......