Hi Guys
Thanx Arnold for your advice,for all you other bros ill just outline my problem which I briefly discussed with Arnold and Ronan and a couple more guys on chat last night.
A most of you who used the facebook forum will know i travelled to china late February to mid March this year ,met Fang whom i'd been in touch with for some 8 months before ,ive posted on the facebook forum previously about our adventures there so if u want to read it check it our on facebook,and ill fill you all in on the problem
Bear in mind bros our immigration is very different to the US immigration,so i can check out what is required ,but as i see it and have discussed with Fang ,she has 2 options 1) She comes here as a visitor for 6 months ,after which she must return to china within the granted visa time ,on one hand its a good sounding out period for her to see if she can cope with life here in the UK ,and also cope with me !!!,as you do need to live with someone to know them well,on the downside she would have to give up her job to come here with no certainty she would be able to return to the job,which she is a doctor out there,this option is i guess not the favourite one as she has so much to loose .
This option is a great way to check out a relationship though,as i had another chinese lady over here for 5 months last year,on a visitor visa but i had certain issues with her and my daughter,whos 7 this month ,and there was definatly friction between them towards the end of her stay,i felt like i was on a rack ....one pulling one way and the other pulling the other,so as my daughter and myself come as a package, she returned back and were friends still now but nothing long term has come from her visit here.
Option 2) i return and marry Fang in china as Arnie suggests and apply for the wife /fiancee visa here
Now for the stmbling block
Fang owns an apartment in a block of flats in Fuzhou,for which she has a mortgage/bank loan for,which has apparently 12 years to run ,for which she has to find 1300 rmb per month,not a vast amount by UK standards i admit,it equates to approx £145 per month,she earns upwards of 2300 rmb herself and her son 1000 rmb of which he gives her 700 rmb to help with the laon ,and general running of the place.
Ive discussed the situation with her at length,but she still has problems getting her head round it and also shes wanting her son to come over too ,,,,which is a non starter at first ,as the visa is for her and family dont come into the equasion for at least a couple of years ,i know as previously i was married to a filipina,and one of my ex wifes filipina friends brings over her mother every 18 months to visit her for 6 months,but it didnt happen until the lady had been here for 2 or 3 years.
And i dont have room for a 21 year old guy in my house as ive only 2 bedrooms,and in my opinion he should be starting to stand on his own 2 feet at 21 years old.
One option i suggested would be to rent out the apartment,but she says she would only get around 4000 rmb per annum in rent,a big shortfall in the total annual loan repayment, saying that i would have thought 4000 rmb PA is rather on the low side but just going on what she told me.
I also suggested the son stay there and took in a lodger while his mom was away in the Uk,
She suggested selling the place,but with the slump in the housing market she says it would maybe take awhile to sell,and if it did sell quickly it still leaves her son without a place to stay,although his grandparents have a large place nearby he could probably stay.
I would be happy to help out with the payments while she was over here ,and she has said that after the 6 months that they are not allowed to work here in the UK,should she get a job here she would comfortably be able to forward the loan back home from her salary here,thing is im not sure how her doctors training and qualifications stack up against the training our docs have here,which would dictate the type of job she would get here.
Another option a friend suggested was to look at a working visa for her,to follow her career in the medical field.but again it begs the question of how she stack up against our docs here .
Fang uses translation software when were online,and i cant help but feel some things i say and suggest do get lost in translation ,and consequently misunderstandings do occur.
All in all Fang has to decide which way she wants to go and i fully understand her problem ,i know shes still nervous about comitting to marrying a second time as the first time apparently want good ,and all credit due shes brought up her son with no help from her ex whatsoever.and i know shes very close to her family there as most of them are,most of us are parents on here so we all appreciate what that brings us,after all we all know whats its like not to be a dad/mum ,but only those who have kids know what its like to be a dad/mom
I was hoping to get something moving within 6 weeks or so of returning home as regards the visa thing ,one way or the other,and i did mention that hadnt she given any thought to what she would do with the house should she meet someone on Chn love,and possibly relocate ,her response was that she didnt expect to meet some one so quick
? 8 months quick
.
Anyhow bros thats the scenario in a nutshell .naturally im feelin a bit pissed off just now as ive found the love of my life ,typical aint it feeling on top of the world when we were together in china ,and now being apart from her and so far away sometimes im lower than a snakes bollocks,but im a fighter and so is she ,and we will overcome this little hitch one way or another
Any input and suggestions from you guys greatly appreciated
Cheers
Mike