China Romance

General Discussion and Useful Links => The Campfire => Topic started by: RegnisTheGreat on December 09, 2009, 10:47:59 am

Title: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: RegnisTheGreat on December 09, 2009, 10:47:59 am
Since I've been on chnlove and blossom.com, I've come across some pretty bad profiles. I'm sure others have as well. So I thought lets share some that we find and we'll all laugh and chuckle (stress reducer).

I'll start with this gem:

have a good economic foundation, good education and family background. alwasy put me in his heart. me is first, him is second.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: brett on December 09, 2009, 10:57:34 am
Well my lady wrote that she wanted to meet a Western prince riding a white house :icon_cheesygrin:.

Loads of ladies seem to mention predestination, but I'm not even sure it's a real word. Maybe they've all copied it from each other.

At the weekend I did find a lady born on the same day as me, that was a bit spooky :s.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on December 09, 2009, 11:03:55 am
Hey, I also found one born on my birthday -  it's a small world...:sleepy:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: David K on December 09, 2009, 07:14:46 pm
Quote from: 'rockycoon' pid='25040' dateline='1260374635'
Hey, I also found one born on my birthday -  it's a small world...:sleepy:
[/i]

There is a 50% probability that, in a gathering of 23 people, two people will have the same birthdate. Its 99% probable in a gathering of 57 :icon_biggrin:
This is counter intuitive, but see
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birthday_problem
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Voiceroveip on December 09, 2009, 07:51:46 pm
Quote from: 'rockycoon' pid='25040' dateline='1260374635'

Hey, I also found one born on my birthday -  it's a small world...:sleepy:


1.4 billion ...
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: shaun on December 09, 2009, 07:55:43 pm
Don,

I don't mean to be rude but who would want to date a woman that old?

Shaun
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Vince G on December 09, 2009, 09:51:37 pm
I remember writing a woman that had the same birth date (the day not year Shaun) :icon_cheesygrin:
I think she took to long to reply and I moved on. My lady now is a few days difference. I'm the 9th she's the 12th. That's why we get along so well.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Willy The Londoner on December 10, 2009, 03:03:15 am
Quote from: 'brett' pid='25039' dateline='1260374254'

Well my lady wrote that she wanted to meet a Western prince riding a white house :icon_cheesygrin:.

Loads of ladies seem to mention predestination, but I'm not even sure it's a real word. Maybe they've all copied it from each other.

At the weekend I did find a lady born on the same day as me, that was a bit spooky :s.


You was not a twin that was split up at birth was you.  Having a female version of Brett about - well that would be really spooky!!!!!

Willy

PS hardly likely to find one born on same birthday as me because by that age they would have given up years ago!!!!
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: brett on December 10, 2009, 03:30:19 am
Guys - I am talking about the same date and same year! Come on, my predestination calls here :icon_cheesygrin:!!!
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Vince G on December 10, 2009, 08:51:12 am
Brett, I don't want some old lady. :icon_biggrin:  and didn't get one either.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Voiceroveip on December 10, 2009, 03:43:20 pm
How about this one, 3 profiles (2 on Chnlove)?

GZB271597 Bday Jun 18 , 1975
My personality is amiable and elegant. I love playing zheng, violin and traveling. As I was brought up in Harbin, it gives me wisdom and beauty. I am a beautician now. Through the rainstorms of these years, I experienced up and down. But still, I am stilling thinking in a logical way, and so, I can withstand up till now. I would also like to say thank you to my family and friends. I wish I could find my lover who cares and understands me.
(http://images3.chnlove.com/woman_photo/GZB/10/GZB271597-1.jpg)

and GZB273513 (hehe, between the two she is 6 years younger, and gained college Bday Oct 15 , 1981
I am a girl who is from a beautiful city - Harbin. My beautiful hometown cultivate me a tender, kind hearted disposition. Just as the color of my hometown in winter, I am pure in my heart. I like white color. I am devoted in my work and my family, I am understanding, loving, passionate, independent.

I am here looking for a man who has a kind heart , who is loving and caring, who would like to share a lifelong time with me, no matter what happen in our life. I don't limit my finding on any race, as long as we make sense in many aspects. I would like to hold his hand to the last of our life.If you are interested in me, let's begin our story...
(http://images3.chnlove.com/woman_photo/GZB/45/GZB273513-1.jpg)

Cherrblossoms.com PID C00199745 for those who have access Bday 06/18/1975
Just a man to be my husband , love me forever , take care for me that`s all! NO games here please!!!
(http://images.blossoms.com/personals/users_images/00/19/97/C00199745f.JPG) (http://images.blossoms.com/personals/users_images/00/19/97/C00199745d.JPG)

Pity, she seems like a real cutie, not that I would be interested, my heart is given away already ... still funny what you come across ...
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: David E on December 10, 2009, 05:12:18 pm
Hahahahah:icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin:

I bet they got a few hundred EMF's with that one !!!!

Suckers !!!

But if she's from Haerbin, it wont be white in her heart...it will be ice !!!

Well spotted Voice:icon_cheesygrin:

Why dont we all send a complaint to the "Intendance Department" ??

David


ps...Voice, you got too much time on your hands !!!!!!!!!!!!
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Voiceroveip on December 10, 2009, 05:17:09 pm
actually I think the story is a bit different ... she mus not be getting the kind of response or the kind of guy she is looking for, so the agency pulled someone elses profile (GZB273513) and made her younger with new pics ... if it was about EMFs, she wouldn't be on cherryblossoms.Com
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Vince G on December 10, 2009, 07:04:09 pm
I think she is one of the bait and switch. She's a pretty woman and I can't imagine her not getting a load of EMF's.
[attachment=1145]  [attachment=1146]
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: RegnisTheGreat on December 12, 2009, 11:34:58 pm
"he should be a nice and caring man, with good heart and like a father. "

Thanks, I was tempted to write to you. But now I feel a bit of incest inside and won't.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on December 12, 2009, 11:57:27 pm
I have seen both chn and blossoms versions, both sent me "smiles" and "admirer" letters...great spot !!
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: RegnisTheGreat on December 17, 2009, 07:07:50 pm
http://www.chineselovelinks.com/member_profile.cfm?ID=607959
"The profile is posted only for a serious marriage before 2011. "

Talk about pressure here. I am not sure I can perform that fast :)
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: David E on December 17, 2009, 07:17:17 pm
She forgot to add....."and divorce with permanent visa and 80% of your assets in 2013".......:icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin:
David
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: ttwjr32 on December 17, 2009, 08:22:57 pm
well said david  she will clean you out at a later date
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on December 21, 2009, 02:15:20 am
run forest run.....
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: RegnisTheGreat on December 21, 2009, 12:17:21 pm
Quote
I am a joky, and I live in Sichuan, a city (Mianyang) like music, especially jazz, I like to have the remainder of the jazz bars, coffee and chat.I listening to music, or want to participate in some of the work, now.I friend's parties . Go shopping, buy things bra's vocation, watch a movie, steep! Sometimes very irritable mood, I like a person out to visit alone.But biggest desire is to be able to and their own beloved boyfriend to go to China Tibet, If you is such a friend, please add me! Please write to me Sorry! I is a standard member, we can not see letter.please Kaga! To contact me. Sometimes the mood is very fidgety, I like a person to go out a tour alone.But the biggest wishes be the ability and oneself's beloved boyfriend to go to China Tibet, I still like the life style of the west.If you is that so a friend, please add me! Sorry! I is the standard membership, we can not see the letter.please add me! contact me.

Shopping, buying things, vacations, and wanting to go to Tibet with the boyfriend. Do I hear a gold digger? Maybe also ADD for the repetition :)
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 12, 2010, 11:14:42 pm
The fun is trying to figure out what she is trying to say....  There you go Reg, write a translation program for letters like that...probably drive the computer crazy..:icon_cheesygrin:

Buzz buzz, click, click...."Does not compute"  :huh:
HERE IS A NEW WORD FOR YOU GUYS, GOT THIS ONE TONIGHT.

. My purpose here is very pure and without any taradiddle, I wish you can see my heart inside, not only judge from my appearance, and I am very confident to my appearance.

ANY IDEA WHAT A "TARADIDDLE" IS?
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Vince G on January 13, 2010, 12:12:09 am
tittle-tattle? Maybe?
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: maxx on January 13, 2010, 12:32:36 am
Rocky taradiddle  means a small lie
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: ttwjr32 on January 13, 2010, 11:43:00 am
havent heard that word in ages
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Vince G on January 13, 2010, 12:20:56 pm
I never heard this word? But he's right (after I looked it up) :huh:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: maxx on January 13, 2010, 05:54:15 pm
yes I had to look it up.I'd never heard it before.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 13, 2010, 07:32:28 pm
Well we all know what a taradiddle is now, I thought it had to do with the space on a hardrive, they have terabytes, god only knows it could be a new speed....:icon_cheesygrin:   my computer is now processing at 20 teradiddles.....lol  :icon_cheesygrin:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: chen yan on January 13, 2010, 10:00:47 pm
Quote from: 'RegnisTheGreat' pid='25814' dateline='1261094870'

http://www.chineselovelinks.com/member_profile.cfm?ID=607959
"The profile is posted only for a serious marriage before 2011. "

Talk about pressure here. I am not sure I can perform that fast :)


Most of the girl donn't want to across a line of 30 years old and still be single, She seems like a good girl,Just a little anxious. Reg, You know how to distinguish the good girl,So I think you just keep searching, You can find the one who is right for you soon.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 22, 2010, 09:18:46 pm
Reg,  she sure don't want much does she?  Wow and did you notice the age limit -- to 99 years old!  and no nothing else.
Wow agian, well I wish her all the good luck, because I don't think anyone is that perfect except :angel:.  We all have our little faults and so no one is perfect, you take what is given and be glad you got it in the first place.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: David E on January 22, 2010, 11:50:24 pm
Quote from: 'rockycoon' pid='29072' dateline='1264213126'

Reg,  she sure don't want much does she?  Wow and did you notice the age limit -- to 99 years old!  and no nothing else.
Wow agian, well I wish her all the good luck, because I don't think anyone is that perfect except :angel:.  We all have our little faults and so no one is perfect, you take what is given and be glad you got it in the first place.


I reckon she would need a Man 99 years old to meet her expectations...no fags, no booze, no gambling and no sex........at 99 quite possibly his next smoke, game of poker, bottle of beer or a bonk would carry him off !!!!....and then shes got all the assets

If she was supermodel material, I could probably understand it a bit better......but........  :icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: RegnisTheGreat on January 23, 2010, 01:02:53 pm
I think she means sex prior to marriage.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 23, 2010, 10:20:15 pm
At 99 years old, sex is the last thing on your mind....:s
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: David E on January 24, 2010, 04:41:55 am
Quote from: 'rockycoon' pid='29122' dateline='1264303215'

At 99 years old, sex is the last thing on your mind....:s


Rock

I imagine at 99, the ONLY thing on your mind is "will I wake up tomorrow" !!!!:icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin:

David
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: ttwjr32 on January 24, 2010, 06:06:30 am
or when you wake up you give thanks for another day
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 24, 2010, 08:03:26 pm
HERE IS ONE THAT WILL STEAM UP YOUR KEYBOARD...profile avalible upon request...:icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin:

I love to be loved
I need, yes I need to be loved
I love to be loved by you.
Yes, I love to be loved by you.
Do you want to get the love from me too?
I do partier also. Love for long time.


Only thing missing is "how much?"  Hey Willy, think I found you one for the cake at the brotherhood meeting....haha
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: ttwjr32 on January 25, 2010, 11:09:01 am
were was that at china love or china lust ??
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 26, 2010, 03:40:20 am
CHN admirer letter sent yesterday to me...I just copied part of it.  
The rest of it was general bla, bla, bla  :icon_cool:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: ttwjr32 on January 26, 2010, 09:44:38 am
Rockycoon---- she will love you long time :icon_cheesygrin:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 26, 2010, 02:09:22 pm
I get worn out just reading it...:icon_rolleyes:

and the money keeps rolling in...:icon_cheesygrin:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: David S on January 26, 2010, 02:16:10 pm
Quote from: 'rockycoon' pid='29225' dateline='1264381406'

HERE IS ONE THAT WILL STEAM UP YOUR KEYBOARD...profile avalible upon request...:icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin:

I love to be loved
I need, yes I need to be loved
I love to be loved by you.
Yes, I love to be loved by you.
Do you want to get the love from me too?
I do partier also. Love for long time.


Only thing missing is "how much?"  Hey Willy, think I found you one for the cake at the brotherhood meeting....haha


Isn't that the lyrics from a '70's song by Cheap Trick?

Cheap Trick - I want you to want me! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_DmpM8DMZ9E)
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 26, 2010, 08:48:14 pm
Don't know, but it sounds like a "cheap trick"...haha:icon_cheesygrin:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: ttwjr32 on January 26, 2010, 08:58:30 pm
probably the translator talking and no real profile of
a lady
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: odysseus007 on January 27, 2010, 05:46:29 pm
Quote from: 'RegnisTheGreat' pid='25814' dateline='1261094870'

http://www.chineselovelinks.com/member_profile.cfm?ID=607959
"The profile is posted only for a serious marriage before 2011. "

Talk about pressure here. I am not sure I can perform that fast :)


Oh Reggie, she has updated it to make your day :

Member Overview  
I like kids, cooking and my friend think me educated, serious, sincere and considerate with good temper. Most importantly, I value happiness of my family so I have been good at massage nerve... So for my husband, I will be loving and romantic. I am just moderately pretty but not beautiful. But do you like kids? I need a meeting with future husband asap before the middle of March.
 
Seeking

he who can respect my preference below: do not smoke, no drunk, no drug, and do not gambling. I have good temper, wish you the same. Plus: you must be healthy and rich enough to buy an apartment at least for only me in Shanghai and show your ability to raise a family. if you agree to make love after marriage, house can be bought after marriage; if you wanna make love before marriage, that house must be bought before making love as a guarantee.
 
Gender: Male  
Aged: 29 - 99
 
And please don't stain the title deed with any bodily fluids? Haha...
Quote from: 'rockycoon' pid='28166' dateline='1263429148'

Well we all know what a taradiddle is now, I thought it had to do with the space on a hardrive, they have terabytes, god only knows it could be a new speed....:icon_cheesygrin:   my computer is now processing at 20 teradiddles.....lol  :icon_cheesygrin:


Oh she has quite the powerful vocab doesn't she? And you guys didn't even know such a word, :icon_cheesygrin:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: RegnisTheGreat on January 27, 2010, 05:53:19 pm
Haha, apartments in Shanghai is bloody expensive. My brother said that good ones are in the range of 50,000-60,000RMB per square meter.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: odysseus007 on January 27, 2010, 05:59:36 pm
Quote from: 'RegnisTheGreat' pid='29555' dateline='1264632799'

Haha, apartments in Shanghai is bloody expensive. My brother said that good ones are in the range of 50,000-60,000RMB per square meter.


Haha, "sex on the house".... afterwards I guess you can go default on the mortgage eh? I am a realtor by the way.

Here the local Chinese folk have a saying : "If you wanna drink milk, there's no need to buy the whole cow !!!" :icon_cheesygrin:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: RegnisTheGreat on January 27, 2010, 06:01:39 pm
I bet you 100% she wants the house bought outright before marriage for sex before marriage. Otherwise, she'll still get a lot in the divorce.
I'm worried too. Chen Yan a few posts ago made a good comment about this girl and suggested I go after her. I'm begining to question her eye on good woman now :icon_mrgreen::icon_mrgreen::icon_mrgreen::icon_mrgreen:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: David E on January 27, 2010, 06:43:26 pm
"Plus: you must be healthy and rich enough to buy an apartment at least for only me in Shanghai and show your ability to raise a family. if you agree to make love after marriage, house can be bought after marriage; if you wanna make love before marriage, that house must be bought before making love as a guarantee. "

One bonk for an apartment worth about $250,000........I can think of cheaper ways....it's called Prostitution....here we have prostitution in its Purest form. :icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin:

Who writes this claptrap for these women...which guy would be nuts enough to even consider such a woman !!!!

Hopefully she can stay in her fantasy World for the next 30 years and not trap some unfortunate idiot !!!

David
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: ttwjr32 on January 28, 2010, 12:10:57 am
DavidE-  i can surely bet there is an idiot out there somewere for
            her:-/
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 28, 2010, 12:21:14 am
P.T. Barnum said that there is a sucker born every minute....:icon_cheesygrin:

That is the most expensive piece of *** I have heard of, this side of Vegas...:icon_cool:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: ttwjr32 on January 28, 2010, 02:10:00 am
and she will take good care of you also.
wow what a good catch  hahahahah
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: odysseus007 on January 28, 2010, 11:12:22 am
Quote from: 'rockycoon' pid='29580' dateline='1264656074'

P.T. Barnum said that there is a sucker born every minute....:icon_cheesygrin:


Don't forget the second part :
...And two to take him !

Well, she's bonkable if you're bankable. :dodgy:
I'd bet her role models are Ivana Trump,
Suzy Welch, Anna Nicole Smith, and soon to be Elin Woods.

He doesn’t make much money
Five thousand dollars per;
Some judge who thinks he’s funny
Says, “You pay six to her.”

He says, “Now judge, suppose I fail?”
The judge says, “Bud, right into jail.
You’d better keep her
You’ll find it cheaper
Than making whoopee
Quote from: 'David E' pid='29561' dateline='1264635806'

One bonk for an apartment worth about $250,000........I can think of cheaper ways....it's called Prostitution....here we have prostitution in its Purest form. :icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin:
David


That's what I mean by "If you wanna drink milk, there's no need to buy the whole cow !!!" If the gal wants a house, I know one... it's called a hoe-house :icon_cheesygrin:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: ttwjr32 on January 28, 2010, 07:52:38 pm
just go get a haircut here if thats what your looking for
many places for that just have to keep the eyes open
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 28, 2010, 09:30:24 pm
ttwjr,  I think the old term, which I don't think anyone here is aware is called "trim".
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: David S on January 28, 2010, 09:35:45 pm
Quote from: 'rockycoon' pid='29691' dateline='1264732224'

ttwjr,  I think the old term, which I don't think anyone here is aware is called "trim".


Nothing wrong with a little trim with your trim is there?
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Lee357 on January 30, 2010, 10:40:44 pm
Final line of an admiration letter I recieved prior to hidding my profile for Lin Ya,
Oh, if you want to send me something you can send to the following address as they would then give to me, Room,****,No***,Wu yi Road, Changsha,China. thanks in advance.

Lady? from the Changsha Deeply Loving Matchmaking Co. Ltd.
First letter sent to a new guy and this? :@
Can we probably assume she is a "gold digger" yet?
Or is the Translater a "gold digger"?
By the way brothers feel free to send a gift to her if you like.
Earlier in letter she states that we have things in common and could find more in common after we "work things out" and could find things in common when we are alone together.
Just like fair tickets I think, Pay to ride the ride.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Vince G on January 30, 2010, 11:05:30 pm
Lee, A room, work things out and a promise of being alone together... Sounds more like a hooker?
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 30, 2010, 11:41:20 pm
Probably be working things out in the doctors office after that one.:s

Vince, went to cll area and low and behold if they didn't have some photos of some girls I have seen before on porno site.  I'd know that face anywhere, only when I saw her she had no shirt...haha,  by the way, before you ask, the damn porno comes up automatically
from another site (shaun).  hhahaha :icon_cheesygrin:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: Vince G on January 30, 2010, 11:57:48 pm
A friend of mine does this all the time. He'll send me some profile from some personals he found saying, look at this? She wants to meet? Then I tell him which porn star it is and the profile or at least the photo is fake. And before you ask I do search through sites checking things out. Never know who's picture shows up in a few places. I've gotten letter (not Chnlove) from women saying how good looking I am? Funny I didn't post a photo? One I even signed up as Marco Polo, with his photo, age 99 yo and get contacts sent to me? Thank God I'm taken.
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: rockycoon on January 31, 2010, 12:26:56 am
Marco Polo...haha  I'll have to remember that one....snicker...:icon_cheesygrin:
Title: RE: Amusing/Worst Profiles
Post by: ttwjr32 on February 04, 2010, 11:34:32 am
i used to like to play games with them and lead them on and
they thought they had one hooked. i wish i could have come up
with something to actually get them to send me a little money
in return for their big payout but i didnt figure that out but i
hooked quite a few who thought they were going to get a big payout