China Romance
General Discussion and Useful Links => The Campfire => Topic started by: mpo on September 23, 2010, 08:40:40 pm
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:)
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Nice update mate, good to know things are going well for you.
I hope they send you a big FAT refund and that will help towards another trip to see your beloloved wife... ;D
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Mike I think no matter where you are or go it is always the same. Hurry up and wait. People tell us patience. I am not sure I have that kind of patience. We'll see.
There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think that I will move there and come back when she gets her visa. I know I can't do that. The other thought is Mexico but I can't do that either. :'(
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Great story Mike I have a question for you? If you decide to come back to the United States to work and or to live will you have to apply for your wife and child citizenship to the united states?Or will you and your family apply for citizenship in Canada?I guess what I am saying is they dont have citizenship in either country United States or Canada?I was just wondering how that worked thanks Ron
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Thanks Mike I was just wondering how that would play out its very interesting indeed.As long as all of you can be together that is the main thing.Thanks Mike I appreciate you sharing that. Ron
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Hey Mike,
Technically Jessica is telling you the truth. When we (chinese people) address cousins, we address them as "biao" or "tang" depending on which side of the family (mother or father) and sister or brother... for example...older male cousin would be "biao ge" or "tang ge" and younger female cousin would be "biao mei" or "tang mei". When we address the cousin, especially older ones, as children, we were usually told to call them "name" ge-ge or jie-jie.
Note, amoung the westernized chinese, they really only use the cousin name as reference... unless their family is traditional...
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:o :o :o I don't even know if I want to address that subject with Peggy. She tells me there are six of them but she calls them by the order in the family. I guess this means they really are brothers and sisters.
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WOW, congratulations , my only question is it a son or daughter ;) just for the documents , they will need that info , it is a great little puppy , to keep her company and excellent cam photo's , regards Sujuan and Robert .
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Those are cute pictures. You're a lucky man Mike.
Nina referred to her best friend as Older Sister which really confused me.
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Oh Dear Mike........one more mouth to feed ;D ;D ;D
But what lovely photos.......
David
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Great Photo's Mike. But take the fur off and its not quite a mouthful!!!!
Willy
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Great Photo's Mike. But take the fur off and its not quite a mouthful!!!!
Willy
A hat and a snack. Sorry it just slipped out.
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WOW Mike
If you think getting a visa for a Chinese wife is difficult....try getting an import permit for a dog or a cat !!!...been there, done that !!!
Add to the complexity, the cost of Vet. Certificates, CIRTES clearance, 6 months quarantine, freight and insurance........
Makes a Wife/Fiance visa look like a walk in the Park !!!!
;D ;D ;D
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David , not to mention now .. Mike needs to decide .. either bring the Dog or the Wife . Like he said , NO extra Ticket for the Flight . :o ???
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David .... I would not want to go through that process, NO WAY ....
Arnold ... very funny, I was laughing so hard I almost fell over! The dog would LOSE on that choice!!!!! 8);)
Nothing like a good Laugh , when your Lady is not here with you . Now remember Maxx's 24 Hour Rule before you REALLY decide .. which ?
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Arnold maybe Mike should get a consult with Maxx before he makes decision. I know the 24 hr rule applies here but it may be deeper than that. ;D
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That puppy is pretty cute.
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HHhhMMmm , maybe a fur collar :o
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Hey this is way too much fun and no one has even mentioned viagra OR squat toilets. :o ::) :-X
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Either that or have your picture taken with 2 Great Danes and tell her your dogs are looking for a play toy. ;D
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Mike,
That is a pretty cute puppy there. Your wife is very nice looking too. It is easy to see why it is not a hard choice to make.
Dave C
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And the Dog can't cook Dumpling's
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Well there you go. Decided then. Mike can take Jessica with him to Canada. ;D Dog? Becomes dumplings.
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I have my fingers crossed for you Mike. I hope that you get her here within the 2 to 4 month time span the lawyer mentions to you. Good luck! :)
Dave C
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Update
The lawyer gave me a time window of 2 to 4 months once the papers are submitted .... they will likely call her in for an interview, and also request a medical check....
The alternative was to bring her by way of the US first, and that would of taken 8 months... so we are going to apply at the Canada embassy first, and hopefully it will all work out.
8 Months to the US. How does he think he could get it do so quickly?
Sorry Mike pretty stressed out about, just being a smart ass
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Not a bad way to "use" someone WRT the English teacher, maybe something in this, just say it is some "homework" Jessica is looking into. Anyway everything is crossed here mate for a speedy application process. Good luck Mike and Jessica.
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Mike,
You wife was right, ( ha ha aren't they all!) English teachers are a good resources. My wife's teacher helped me through our wedding ceremony. It was conducted in Mandarin and she managed to get me through the whole thing, telling me when to bow or a hundred other things it seemed I had to do. I will always be grateful for that as without her it could of all gone badly wrong at any moment. Plus the ceremony was recorded so I could have lived my mistakes over and over again. As it is there is a beautiful Chinese lady just to one side saying "bow three times" and the like! Congratulations on your 3 month anniversary and may the next 5 pass quickly....
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Congratz Mike. Hope it is the 3 months.
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Mike all I can say is patience. She will have to learn to trust you. There are to many armchair quarterbacks in China. You'll get past it. Read about what David E said on this thread.
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Mike you are further ahead in your journey than I am. I have thought about these things and one thing I have said to myself, is just take it one step at a time. In the end, you will get there. There will be bumps in the road, just travel over them. Shaun is right, "patience", this is one of those times you need it.
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Mike, I'm sure this is something simple, you are dealing with bureaucrats here, if every I is not dotted and every t crossed..well you know the rest.
Find out what was wrong in your qin ai de application, put it right and things will sort themselves out in time.
If i could send you a little Irish luck I would so in a heartbeat!
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They know oh so well .. how to test our Patience ! I think they get a KICK out of this , doing this to People .. to see how serious we really are .
Anyway , hope it isn't too bad of an holdup for you two .
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Hi Mike
As you can read in my latest "saga"...I can fully sympathise with your dilemma, I guess like me you have been "out-logiced" by someone who knows bugger all about the subject...but is a Chinese native. !!!!
Been there...done that
I've just cooled off over my issues, thanks to some kind words from the Bros....its all sent to try us mightily...but the rewards make it worth it in the end !!!
David
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Update:
I got the application package to my wife at the end of October .... but all of the instructions were in English, and she did not understand them...
I told her she had to find an English expert, and she got hold of her English teacher ...
The application was sent in at the end of November .... as it had to wait until the daughter returned to China from Japan ....
At this time there was a lot of confusion, my wife was very anxious, and kept insisting that the papers were not right, that the lawyer was no good ... in the end I realized she was saying all of this based on her hearing from other Chinese ladies about applications for spouse visa's or finacee visa's .... which do not apply to our situation, as we are applying for a Temporary Residence Visa (TRV) for Canada. And not for a spouse visa, because for us to apply for that would require me to be either a Canadian citizen (I am a US citizen) OR a for me to have Permanent Residence Status in Canada ... (which I do not have) ... I am a Temporary Foreign Worker in Canada, who is here on a Work Permit, so there is a whole other process for people that are Temporary Workers here, and that is the path we have to go, in order to bring her into Canada.
My wife was determined to apply for the spouse visa, which of course would be rejected right away, as I am NOT eligible for this kind of application.
So now it is 3 weeks later .... and I get a panic call from my wife, and we talk on QQ, and I am told that all of the papers were returned by the embassy, with no explanation. So I tell her .... that is strange, let me talk to the lawyer and ask what this means ....
so I talk to the lawyer and they say .... please show us the cover letter that was returned with the papers, they always give a reason for doing this .... I am now waiting to ask my wife about this ....
So at this point my wife is now determined to travel to the embassy to hand them the papers in person, and to ask them what the problem really is .....
So now we have been married about 4 months, and time is marching by, and we still do not have an application in at the embassy.
:-\
Mike,
I have been watching and reading your story with great interest. In my honest opinion I think you will be in for a long process. Your situation is truely unique here and I am praying for you.
Dave C
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Wouldn't that be the best ever New Year present Mike....fingers crossed ;D ;D ;D
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Mike I'm praying for you.
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Mike I'm very sorry to hear this.What is your next step.Can your lawyer appeal the denile
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Mike, I am sure sorry to hear this. None of this has come easy for you. So do what you do so well push in, persevere, and overcome.
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Mike , sorry to read this , this may seem stupid but you had to apply for some type of work permit for Canada if she was your wife living in USA what would she have to get to join you in Canada ? Just thinking outside the square , regards Sujuan and Robert .
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Ah, sorry to hear that Mike. I hope there is some way to resolve it. It's so stupid that they are hard on legitimate relationships.
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Mike so sorry to hear the news as I know what you are going through with the waiting process. I believe it was the Canadian immigration denying her visa?
If so it sure is a lame excuse because your wife has already a past history of working outside of China in Japan where she obviously did return to China which should show that she is a trustworthy person. Sometimes I think our immigration has their heads in the clouds and believe every person is willing to get into Canada anyway they can because they think it is some Utopia.
Hopefully your lawyer can use her previous work visa to Japan as an example to help with your case.
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Hey Mike,
Sorry to hear about the rejection. I would definitely wait for the lawyer, but there are a few issues I think you need to get across...
1) Her work history outside of China should be attached with supporting documentation
2) You might want to have the lawyer inquire why they requested the stuff from your end if they've already denied her the VISA. It might shed some light... if this is a form document (which governments love to use), then the reasoning might be because they didn't have a checkmark for your issue.
3) Check the document for a contact number to the person who reviewed Jessica's application. Maybe you or your lawyer can get a bit more detail.
There are a bunch of things I would suggest, but your case is complex...
Also, I would suggest visiting one of the forums that Martin and Rhonald frequent... immigration.ca and ask around. They seem to be a decent bunch of people who might be able to offer you some more insight.
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Mike,
Sorry to hear that, it must be very disappointing for you...chin up, it'll happen.
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I can feel your heartache hidden within the wealth of detail you provided with your response Mike. I guess the best thing to do besides moving forward as you so stated, is to plan and anticipate that next China trip. The anticipation for the next visit will help a little to curtail the frustration from the failure of getting a temporary visa.
My sincere hope is that you only take 8 more months as you estimated as I wish no one the pain of beating my record for waiting. Not even doctors should have the need for so much Patience as we need because then it would mean one sick population. What else can I say Mike, except that we are sick in love and time is the only antidote that we are forced to take.
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IBM Next 5 in 5 -- 2010 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anKiEoxkpxM#ws)
Hey in the future we won't need even QQ or webcam to see our girls but have her Hologram walking and talking beside us.
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Sorry Mike , to hear your Pain .. but not to share it with you . God is testing your Patience ones more , but it will still be worth it at the end .
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Rhonald I seem to remember another video years ago stating we would have flying cars by the year 1980. yeah right!
Mike, keep the faith. They are governments and sorry but government workers are AH's. I just was at the family court (here in NY). Got the run around before so I came to get a copy of the file which they would not release under any circumstance unless I came in person. Well I went in and told them what I wanted... "We'll send the copies in two weeks by mail" idiots.
Beijing likely thinks she'll run across the border to the US? Keep trying they'll fold sooner or later... they all do.
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Mike, I can hear the pain in your words.
I think a lesser man would feel beaten by this but I am sure you will see it though.
This temporary visa doesn't seem to be the way forward here. Canada seems to be a tough place to get a visa for, I think I'd start on the permanent visa process asap and just try my best to visit your wife as often as possible in between.
My heartfelt best wishes to you Mike, keep strong.
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Thanks for the update. Unfortunately we don't know what life has in-store for us in what time? There was a time I went through the same with my kids. I believe fueled by the ex. Even last year there was a rough patch with my younger one. It was all repaired for the new year when I was up there.
I got a court date (March 25th) yesterday which I have been waiting for for years. I still don't know how long it will take after court to have an answer? But I have been standing on the start line ready to sprint. My invention now has a Patent Pending file which gives me the go ahead for production. There was no way for me to TIME this all out. It's not in my control but the government.
So the only advice I can give is hang in there and do what you must get done and wait for the results. A little patiences goes a long way.
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Hi Mike
I am sorry to hear about your ongoing "saga" ref. Visas.........I know it is very frustrating.
It seems that any application that is just a tiny fraction away from normal gets hung up somewhere.
When we see the examples that you, Ron and Jimmy are going through, it reinforces the total inflexibility of the system...and we have not a rat's chance in Hell of changing it !!
Sadly, I have no real advice for you, except to know that this is a temporary phase of your life...and it WILL pass.
You have a lovely Lady who is backing you all the way...that's gotta be worth gold ;D ;D
Forgive me for getting personal...but how is it possible that your children, your own flesh and blood can refuse to communicate with you just because you got married again...surely
they cannot turn their back on their Dad ??? Why cant they simply be happy for you....
I know you are a committed Christian, so I presume you brought your kids up that way..maybe it is time that they remembered that
Hang in there, it will all get better some day soon
Cheers...David
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Mike, it seems that none of this has been easy along the way for you. But you have found a way to work your way through every obstacle successfully. You will work your way through this too.
I am sorry to hear about your children. You know where this comes from. There are about 3 issues at play here. First your children are hurt, they want their parents back together again. That has been their thinking, even if they have not expressed it, all along. Now the reality is that it will not happen. Secondly, they are being influenced by their mother. You can almost bank on the notion that she is filling their minds with trash about you and your new wife. What are the children to do? After all mom has a roof over their heads and feed them everyday, even if you are paying the bulk of it. Only time will overcome that. Third is on a spiritual side and I know you already know what I am talking about so I'll save the others that.
Mike you know what to do. Keep moving forward, press in and pray for the kids. Keep track of what is going on and learn what you can even if you are in Canada because the info will come in handy down the road if you know what I mean.
As always I hope you and your wife are united together soon and that is my prayer for you.
Shaun
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Happy Birthday Mike and Happy Anniversary too. I understand the waiting thing and quite frankly it sucks. But better days are in your future so look to that day.
Shaun
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happy birthday and Anniversary mate...hang in there...
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Happy Birthday Mike and Happy Anniversary too. I understand the waiting thing and quite frankly it sucks. But better days are in your future so look to that day.
Shaun
Mike and Shaun I guess we three must with tears, endure this suckage. It sucks, we age - thus suckage :-\
Right now it is bitter days both for the optimist (but better days are in your future) and the pessimist. But then our journeys have had similar major delays. We three have had to share bumps & spins (bumper cars) with up & down mood swings (roller coaster) to last a lifetime.
And to think, that our emotion sickness is caused by Government's lack of motion - sick isn't it! Well I won't throw up my hands in despair, but will raise the pair to cheer you on this day, your birthday.
Come on fellow forum members and raise a cheer, all for one & one for all....Hip hip hooray... Happy birthday Mr Big Five Ooh.
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I was Perusing through some of the threads and noticed Rholands response. :o it would have been nice if the last 4 letters of your name had been land. Though we've taken it on the Chin, all is well.
No no I haven't been looking at the women in Peru or Iceland. ::)
I said all is well and it is but as I am sure both Mike and Rhonald can give testimony to, there are times of deep anxiety and frustration as we walk through this ungodly wait. I am going through it right now. When I first started this venture with a Chinese woman this was the very thing I feared the most. But as I walk through all of this and think about giving up just one smile and laugh from Peggy washes it all away for a brief time. You see, when I see her I know she is the right one. I know that my bright future is with her. It is when I am home along and I don't really know what to do that causes my despair.
So Mike, Rhon, I guess we are the three lonely musketeers. But be of good cheer because our future will be brighter.
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I hope this gets resolved quickly for you Mike. You have been very patient so far, but it must be wearing on you at times. I hope that soon, you will be writing updates about her living with you.
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Am I slow.
Why is an American applying to Canada?
Unless of course if you are no longer an American but an Canadian then that would answer it!
Willy
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Haha. Willy...you're hilarious.
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There all explained for all. Clear as mud really.
Hope everything goes well Mike. I do not want to read later that your wife is now a Canadian citizen and you are trying to get her American visa again now....... ;)
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Canada ... here for the new job I accepted .... no other reason.
:o and here I thought you wanted to experience living in an igloo, wearing Snow Shoes & travelling by Dog Sled!
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:o and here I thought you wanted to experience living in an igloo, wearing Snow Shoes & travelling by Dog Sled!
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no...thts what I wnt t ;) :o :o :o ;D ;Do do
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Ron,
I would do all that ..... as long as my wife is with me ::)
Wow .. now this is LOVE !
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Arnold. Love? Living in an igloo means more snuggle time.
Funny you can take the boy out of New York but you can take New York out of the boy. ::) There's no hope on this one.
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Funny you can take the boy out of New York but you can take New York out of the boy. ::) There's no hope on this one.
Hey!, Yo!
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I rest my case. ;D
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Well dont wait too long to become a Canadian Citizen.
Then you will be part of the British Commonwealth and our Sovereign lady The Quen will be your Queen.
Of course you can always go to Los Angeles and see all the 'Queens' dragging around.
Willy
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Don't all American's secretly want to be Canadians anyways?
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Me? Wanna be a hoser? What I want to be is a ski instructor in Vail, Colorado. 8)
Yes I know Mike, I'm dreaming too.
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Don't all American's secretly want to be Canadians anyways?
You misunderstood their desire Martin. They wish to share in our common wealth (riches), not be part of the Common Wealth (Rule Britannia).
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Rhonald, you are partially true. You can keep your health care system. Ours isn't that messed up yet. :o
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Mike, sorry to hear about your mother. I'll pray for you, your father and the rest of the family. On top of all that the wait. It is the black hole of not know when things will happen. I hope the interview happens soon for the both of you.
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I am also sorry to hear about your Mom. You can count on one more Prayer for your Dad and your Family to have/get the strength to get over this loss.
How old is your Dad, hope he is in good health.. to give him a fighting chance to make it through this hardest of times.
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Mike, you know I will not/cannot pray for you at this difficult time.
But please be assured that my best wishes and condolences are with you.
Time heals all wounds, soon your LP will be with you to take her share....and to care for you.
David
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I am sorry for your loss. I hope the best for your dad.
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Mike,
Sorry to hear about your mother, hopefully things on the immigration front will pick up soon for you. My condolences to you and your family, Robert
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Mike my thoughts are with you and your Dad at this sad time and while I can not pray for you I wish " in your words" Gods speed with the visa, I know you can't wait for the comfort of your wife in your arms.
All the best
Leeroy
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Mike
My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. I know how hard it is too loose
your mother and not have someone there to help ease the pain. My father is the same age as yours,
but they had been divorced for 30 years . I hope your wife's visa comes soon.
Best wishes,
Haynes
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Mike you should have asked me to write the Eulogy thats what I do along with also writing wedding speeches.
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Wow Mike nice update a little late then never I guess.Anyway sorry to hear about your mom.And happy to hear that your wife has got her visa.and that you have a new job.
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That is/was a lot on one Plate for you.. for sure. In one months time, I do hope (I know you do), things finally will be "Normal" for you two and the rest of your Family.
So you are going to turn your Wife into a "New Yorker" now, or will she turn the State upside down to "Her" liking? ;)
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Thats one bit of good news in a year or that has been filled with more ups and downs than anyone else on here has had to endure.
But then you know just how much 'Keeping the Faith' plays at such times.
Willy
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Mike , I guess you will be revising your heading now that you are in the Little Apple , regards Robert .
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I guess you have "down graded" going back to the USA. Sorry to hear that you left us. And also sorry we didn't get another lunch in with the guys here.