Welcome Must Focus

[Willy The Londoner]

Hi there Brother

Welcome to our forum or rather Brotherhood.   We have members in many countries who are here to help should you need advice or just need a chuckle now and then.

Our experience range from those married for some time to those who like me had initial failures but eventual success.

I now live in China and would not live anywhere else.  

Do not sit back join in and you will enjoy your time here.

Willy

[mustfocus]

Thanks for the welcome!

I must apologise for the delay in writing.  But a few things about me...

Real name: In-Jaul
Location: Canada
Been on Chnlove.com for around 2 years.

Met a wonderful girl, however in the end it didn't work out.  Took two years to realise this.  Been out of the game for a while and thinking of jumping back in to see if there is anyone out there for me.  I've lurked around for about a week before signing up and see that you guys are quite supportive of each other.  Also learning about certain things, some not good (like the agency that represented the girl I loved most likely faked quite a few messages) and some great tips.

Anyway, hopefully with your support, I will find the one and hopefully I can provide some support and insight as well!

[Brian Mc]

Greetings Brothers,

Welome Must Focus, yes you will find this is a fantastic resource for those seeking the love of their life.  These are a great bunch of guys who do support and advise each other and sometimes when needed also give a swift kick in the butt.  However I am sure you will never find a nicer bunch of guys than these here.

Just remember the golden rule  being Maxx's 24 hour rule and also dont be scared to ask questions and ask for help.  We are all looking for the same thing and everything you need except the lady herself is right here.

So welcome to the brotherhod and we all hope you find the lady you are looking for.

Regards,

Zhen and Brian

[Arnold]

Welcome again In-Jaul . Now I know ... WHY ... the Must-Focus .:s
Willy and Brain are right about what they said . Except the one thing about NOT having the Lady itself . We also have those . Some of us have very good LAdy Friend's .. that we call our " Sister's " . These are wonderful Lady's , that we know ( from our search ) to finally wind up with the " Right " one . So these are by no mean Scam's . So if you interested in one of those Lady , also let us know .
Good Luck , In - Jaul .

[brett]

Yeah good luck. I'm currently on my first trip to China and I'm visiting a beautiful lady :angel:.

[ron]

Welcome must focus , In-Jaul
You have come to the right place The brothers will help guide you with ideas and mostly support.A great bunch of fellas here.Some have found their beautiful wives and some have had their ups and downs .But always the brothers have been here to give support and some laughs at the same time.Welcome once again.
                       Ron

[mustfocus]

Thanks for the welcome guys.  Already feel better.  I chose mustfocus as an alias because that's what I have to do.  Got to focus on a few things and get them done...one of them being to find my special one.

Brian: I've seen references to Maxx's 24 hour rule, but I can't seem to find it (or I really suck at using the search engine).

Arnold: I know most are not scams having gotten to know one of the girls.  It didn't work out, but after investing two years into that, I had to take a break.  Although I partially blame the agency for some of the problems we encountered.

Brett: I noticed, glad that you're living the dream!

Ron: Thanks.  I feel a little better finding this site, although after reading some of the stories, I'm also a little discouraged.  But I can always hope that I'll be lucky...

[maxx]

Mustfocus There are two rules that will help you.On your journey.


# 1 DIFFERENT COUNTRY DIFFERENT CUSTOMS. Your lady is from another country.With different morals up bringing,Background.She has different Thoughts and ideas.On how to do things.What may seem strange to you.Is not strange to her.Learn to listen to her ideas and thoughts.It will take you along way down the road.Just because you do something different in your country doesn't mean that's the way it is done in China.Or that it is the right way to do it.

#2 MAXX'S 24 HOUR RULE. Live it love it.learn it. The 24 hour rule is.No matter what crazy thing your Lady says to you.You do not comment on it for 24 hours..You post it here.Give the members here a chance to talk about it debate it.It also gives you a chance to slow down and think about what your lady was trying to tell you.Then you can reply to your lady.

The 24 hour rule is a safety net.It can save yourself alot of worry.It can save your relationship.It can help you keep your foot out of your mouth.But only as long as you use it.


Maxx

[mustfocus]

Mustfocus There are two rules that will help you.On your journey.


# 1 DIFFERENT COUNTRY DIFFERENT CUSTOMS. Your lady is from another country.With different morals up bringing,Background.She has different Thoughts and ideas.On how to do things.What may seem strange to you.Is not strange to her.Learn to listen to her ideas and thoughts.It will take you along way down the road.Just because you do something different in your country doesn't mean that's the way it is done in China.Or that it is the right way to do it.

#2 MAXX'S 24 HOUR RULE. Live it love it.learn it. The 24 hour rule is.No matter what crazy thing your Lady says to you.You do not comment on it for 24 hours..You post it here.Give the members here a chance to talk about it debate it.It also gives you a chance to slow down and think about what your lady was trying to tell you.Then you can reply to your lady.

The 24 hour rule is a safety net.It can save yourself alot of worry.It can save your relationship.It can help you keep your foot out of your mouth.But only as long as you use it.


Maxx

Hi Max,

Number 1 is kinda different for me (at least in my case).  I am of chinese descent (although a few generations removed).  Call me a mix of both east and west.  I am comfortable with most chinese customs, at least the ones I have been introduced to from relatives in other parts of Asia and my parents.  And I usually adapt quite well to most customs, but I will stand up for myself if I feel I am being taken advantage of.

As for number 2... that's good advice, even if it doesn't relate to finding a wife.  Once I start getting back into the groove (my profile is hidden while I figure out how I want to re-write my description), I'll definitely be posting more and most likely leaning on everyone here for help.

[brett]

Actually I think number 1 could be expanded. I am not sure China could be described as a single country. From what I've seen the different provinces and even cities are very different to each other. Here in Hubei Province the folk seem less superstitious than the Cantonese. Also some cities (and indeed ladies) are much more conservative than others.

Attitudes to Westerners also differ. In Hubei Province I am a minor celebrity. I get my photo taken with pretty girls and when I get my shoes shined it attracts a crowd of onlookers. I found it quite entertaining at first, but can you imagine putting up with it if you lived in China with your lady?

Last night my lady was showing me photos of Shenzen. Wow, the pavements are nice and clean. Unlike here in Hubei Province where there are usually big holes and piles of broken paving slabs and sometimes chickens running about on them!

The 24 hour rule is great though :icon_cheesygrin:.

[mustfocus]

Actually I think number 1 could be expanded. I am not sure China could be described as a single country. From what I've seen the different provinces and even cities are very different to each other. Here in Hubei Province the folk seem less superstitious than the Cantonese. Also some cities (and indeed ladies) are much more conservative than others.

Attitudes to Westerners also differ. In Hubei Province I am a minor celebrity. I get my photo taken with pretty girls and when I get my shoes shined it attracts a crowd of onlookers. I found it quite entertaining at first, but can you imagine putting up with it if you lived in China with your lady?

Last night my lady was showing me photos of Shenzen. Wow, the pavements are nice and clean. Unlike here in Hubei Province where there are usually big holes and piles of broken paving slabs and sometimes chickens running about on them!

The 24 hour rule is great though :icon_cheesygrin:.

You should try the small hamlets in Hebei (they are so small that they can't even be called a village, but they're a little bigger than just a street).  That was an eye opener for me.  I have seen small villages in Malaysia.  That could not compare.  Gravel roads with lots of pot holes (and pits) and sheep and chickens roaming the streets.  And I'm not sure what type of harvested plants the sheep were eating all over.

Don't get me wrong.  That part doesn't faze me (well, the washroom/bathroom situation did), but I couldn't stand the roads.  Bumpy like you wouldn't believe it.

BTW, tall chinese guy walking in and you're already a celebrity.  Speak more than a few words of mandarin and are a foreigner and you just keep shooting up.  Add that you happen to have some foreign currency (or in my case, multiple because I grabbed my travel wallet) and you become even moreso.  A lot of people have never seen anything other than renminbi and hold it like a wonderful thing.