Willy
After a defeat like that one in Adelaide...an innings and 75 runs, it would be ridiculous of any Aussie to try to put a positive spin on it !!!
This is the biggest loss by Australian Cricket on home soil for over 25 years !!!
It is a National crisis for us, grown Men are crying openly in the Street and beer sales have hit an all time low !!! All flags are at half-mast and black armbands are to be seen everywhere.
It is rumoured that Ponting , the Selectors and many other cricketers in the Team will be deported to the Colonies for life...but we cant think of anywhere bad enough to send them as a just punishment.....likely they will be condemmed to live in Barrow-in-Furness...which is a horrible fate to contemplate.
But they deserve it and now we must recruit a new team to try to deal with these Poms who CAN play cricket....I've put my hand up for a spot on the Team.....but I think they will be looking for older Men with more experience than me
(It is rumoured that they are going to exhume Sir Don, get him fit again and deal with these bloody Poms once and for all )
Also, there is an unconfirmed rumour that the Aus Cricket Board has quietly asked for help from the Pakistan Cricket Board to act as an intermediary in establishing what it would cost for the English team to take a dive in the next 3 matches. So far, I understand that the price is $100 per player...with a commission to some un-named Pakistanis of $ 20 Million !!! Although this is a lot of money, the average Aussie will voluntarily accept a rise in the price of beer to cover this cost....there is no sacrifice too great to get the world as we know it back on track !!!!
