Author Topic: 5 days and counting  (Read 2408 times)

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Offline JamesM.Roberts

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5 days and counting
« on: May 11, 2012, 08:44:10 am »
In 5 short days (Haa! seems like a eternity) I will be picking Ping up at the airport. Funny thing is I'm more nervous now than I have ever been.
Will she like it here?
Will she be able to tolerate my cooking?
Will she get so homesick and miss her family so much....she'll be miserable?
She is from a sub-tropical region in China and has never seen snow-I live in the mid-west and have been waist deep in it.
She is from a city where everything you could ever want is within 2-3 blocks walking distance-I live where the nearest store is two miles away.
Now that the time draws near, all of these questions haunt me. I have taken steps to make this her home, so she'll for comfortable.
Bought her a good computer and sent money so Momma would also have a good computer- so they can QQ and see each other though video chat. I have a phone service so they can talk forever on the phone . Found out we have a international food store in town. Even got dish t.v with the great wall package, but there are things I can't change....the weather....the non-existent public transportation.....the spacious of a small town....and racist and prejudice she might encounter here.
Given the current events in Chinese -American relations I don't think I'll start breathing until I see her at the airport.....It's going to be a long 5 days!!
Anyone can pick up an apple off the ground, but the sweeter ones take a little work to get to!!

Offline Neil

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Re: 5 days and counting
« Reply #1 on: May 11, 2012, 10:07:29 am »
I will hold my breath with you.  I am eager to read the stories of how your wife adapts, and slightly jealous, though I know it will happen eventually for us as well. 

Good luck James.
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Re: 5 days and counting
« Reply #2 on: May 11, 2012, 11:00:03 am »
James, I and sure many more here.. were in the same shoes as you now. In my case, I worried as much as you.. but found out it was pretty much for nothing really. If they love you (i mean really love you) they'll adjust to our lifestyle as we would going to China if necessary.
This adjustment of course is not going to happen over-night, it'll take at least two days. ;D

Offline Willy The Londoner

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Re: 5 days and counting
« Reply #3 on: May 12, 2012, 02:21:13 am »
Me.  Two days and counting until I get back home to China. I cannot wait. Uk is a crap place when you don't really want to be here on ones own.

My advice to you two waiting is go and relax in a quiet room.    ::)

Willy
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Now in my 12th year living here,

Offline Irishman

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Re: 5 days and counting
« Reply #4 on: May 12, 2012, 01:15:35 pm »
James, I shared the same concerns when Sunny came here to live in Ireland. She was originally from the countryside but her family moved to Guangzhou. She told me she never wants to live in the countryside again, even though I told here it was something I'd really like to do.
The suburbs of Dublin, Ireland are not exactly a metropolis to say the least.

So how did it go?

Yes she was really home sick for a while. But she can webcam with her family back home (her sister is a little younger and can use a computer fine). You did the right thing by getting her folks set up with one, it really will make things easier for her.

She is coming to be with you, her husband. The man she has committed herself to, that is the most important thing. Chinese women are mentally very strong I think and very passionate about family and you are now family, all else is secondary.
Be nice to her, try and find if there are any good Chinese stores withing an hour or so driving distance so she can stock up on supplies. bring her to a good Chinese restaurant where she will tell you the food isn't as good as back home, but she will appreciate the gesture big time.

Most of all be patient, let her find her way and if she doesn't want to leave the house for a week or two that's fine. Let her get settled in to her new home ,she will probably want to move everything around to the "right" place - do it with a smile :)
When she is ready do some sightseeing, everything is going to be a bit of a culture shock to her so take it slow, this is a marathon you entered not a sprint.

All the best!
« Last Edit: May 12, 2012, 01:18:57 pm by Irishman »
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Offline john1964

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Re: 5 days and counting
« Reply #5 on: May 12, 2012, 10:48:51 pm »
James, I too shared your concerns, MinYing was not worried at all, Yes of course she misses the family which is understandable, She calls them often and has regular QQ sessions with family and friends and has made new friends very quickly here, She absolutely loves her new life here and tells me that no matter where ever we live she will always be at my side.
She loves my cooking,  :-\, I want dumplings, WE both shop together and cook together and she feels very comfortable here, There are many Chinese where we live and we do not encounter racial prejudice in our small town, Give her time to adapt to her new life and surroundings, There are very adaptive women.
MinYing comes from a small city 8.000.000 people  :P, She loves the lack of pollution and blue skies and not so many people ready to push and shove to get somewhere first, Not many days to go now and all your worries will be behind you, Treat her well and she will love you always and be at your side, John. 
PS, MinYing is making me dumplings for breakfast  ;D

Offline JamesM.Roberts

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Re: 5 days and counting
« Reply #6 on: May 13, 2012, 07:14:32 am »
You gentlemen are absolutely the best....seems no matter what obstacle or doubt I've encountered in my journey to this point, you always knew exactly what to say and what not to say.
For those of you who remember-I first came here confused and bewildered -Ping was still married to her estranged husband,and I was in love, but was also thinking that I might have been played. With your advice and cooler heads, questions were asked and I began to see things from Ping's point of view.

Thanks to you Ping and  her family  knows that through thick and thin.....good or bad .....James will be there. It would have been easy to walk away in the beginning with a bad attitude and a dislike for anything internet, but now I see the best thing that could have happened in our relationship, was her not being 100% honest.

I'll probably never understand all of the cultural differences we will face- but I know we will face them together(With the help of 40-50 guys) ;D
Forever in your debt-Thank you!!

p.s. I will be posting a new "favorite photo" soon.....give you a hint it will be in the O'Hare airport
Anyone can pick up an apple off the ground, but the sweeter ones take a little work to get to!!

Offline JamesM.Roberts

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Re: 5 days and counting
« Reply #7 on: May 13, 2012, 07:31:33 am »
I will hold my breath with you.  I am eager to read the stories of how your wife adapts, and slightly jealous, though I know it will happen eventually for us as well. 

Good luck James.


Thank you Neil I appreciate your well wishes and please do not be jealous. I know it happen for you soon, as you are aligned with some really great and knowledgeable people here. I will continue to keep posting here (these are my friends) with stories of Ping adapting.....at least until Ping starts reading English >:( then I'll post about other stuff  ;) Well I better log off now and go hang the sign in the bathroom to help her adjust. Thanks James
Anyone can pick up an apple off the ground, but the sweeter ones take a little work to get to!!

Offline shaun

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Re: 5 days and counting
« Reply #8 on: May 13, 2012, 08:02:57 am »
James, like Neil, I am happy for you and jealous of you.  But I know all will be good for you.  I can't even imagine what the jitters are like at this point but hope to have them some day soon.  Good luck and hope to hear about the adjustments.

Mike, the same for you.