Author Topic: Leaving...  (Read 1930 times)

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Offline Sylvain D

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Leaving...
« on: August 12, 2009, 03:19:03 pm »
Well.

I don't really know if my post will be "clear enough", but I will try to do my best for anybody here to understand it as well.

Since more than 8 months, I am on Chnlove and also, I joined the Facebook's forum related to Chnlove. I "saw" many men over there, helpful, giving good advices, and many other things to take in consideration, to learn and to memorize.
I was really happy to see a real nice brotherhood.

The forum "moved" or better would I say "was created" once again, here. Many members came, new ones came, too, and it became a bit bigger. A good news, so. Congratulation, Ronan, and all those who helped on this forum.
With it, there are always many stories to share, some good advices to give and to listen, the famous 24h rules and still many other things.

For any reason, I still don't really understand and know why I'm the only french to be here. I don't really know how it can be for swedishes and other men outside Great Britain, U.S.A and Australia, if you speak in english everyday or not, but I doubt anyway that german do.
Maybe, in my personal case, would I say that it is almost difficult to really understand all the threads here. It is also really difficult to understand many jokes and many other things... well, maybe is it because I'm not really as good in english as I would have thought... who knows? But for sure, I'm just a minority here with my nationality (like some other ones), and, even if I can speak in english, my first language is french.
Sometimes, I do admit that I'm fed up with it, just because I don't really know how to understand something, then I try to see if I can understand by reading again, or with any translator tool... but most of the time, there's nothing to do. I then reply something that (I think), everybody can understand it. Some other time, most of you explain me in another way, and thanks for that ;)

I'm really happy to read some new stories and many other topics.

Well.
I'm not often connected on MSN but I also was in contact with 2 members from here, a few times ago. I do remember about Ed and his nice advices, and for the discussions we could had. Many thanks again ;)
I also do remember about another one... but I would say it is a bit "sad" because for anything I still don't really understand, I got no any reply anymore since a moment... Well... Maybe would anybody say that "best is the indifference"...
If so, just tell me what a brotherhood is and all its real meaning when you ask him any good advice or anything that could help...
However, I will not give his name, but he'll surely recognize himself easily.

I tried to understand why I did not have any reply to my last mails... but what else to do, facing a wall who seems to not respond you? Maybe in China, chinese ladies don't reply to all letters, they just reply to the most important ones... but I'd then say that we're still westerners at first and there's a way to communicate. Who would say I'm not polite when writting/talking and trying to understand what's wrong? Maybe is it that way to be that can be boring:huh:
For any other reply said from him on one of my recent threads, I still don't really know if it still is like some "teasing" or not at all... and even if I should wait any hours, I still don't know the answer. But what can I do, so, when I see that writting any other mail would not be really helpful...
That's why I feel a bit "bored" and, the more the days go, the more I don't really like that way to be.
Maybe am I wrong, maybe did I say something wrong, maybe did I do something which was not good...I don't know. But if so, then i apologize.

I left the forum on CHNLOVE.
I also will leave this one, too.
Maybe do some of you think that I can really understand all and nothing here, maybe will you also think I'm nosey, too. Even if it was like some "teasing", I would just say that yes, I ask many questions, yes I try to do my best to understand. But when sometimes, I don't understand many things and that I don't really know how to be with another member here, except feeling "neutral"...I would just say "what a pity".
If some members here felt like "injured" or felt that I am too "nosey" or asking so many questions, sorry so, but it wasn't meant anyway to bother anyone here.
I tried to bring up some ideas, maybe most of them are not good, but I also tried to do my best to give any good advices/ideas and any other things else that might can be helpful or be useful.
Maybe was the thread about the age "not polite"...but I do still believe that some members disagree with that thread.

I prefer not staying because of the atmosphere I dislike those last days. It's my way to be, sorry but I assume it. Not concerning all of you, for sure. Just me... and because of any "misunderstood? " with someone else.
I've learned many things here thanks to many members. But I just want to give up now because I do think that sometimes, when something goes wrong and that you can't solve it, maybe the best thing to do is to turn back and go away.
I won't come back again. It is also my choice and I know that it goes one way when I'm like that.

I think I said what I wanted to say, so, just know that I really enjoyed many moments with all of you. I Wish all of you the best about your love stories in China.

Enjoy your trips and life.
Thanks again for all your efforts and understanding,

Sylvain
- Let's Rock -

David5o

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RE: Leaving...
« Reply #1 on: August 12, 2009, 03:40:25 pm »
Sly,

About the calling you '' Nosy'' That's just playful banter, there was no malice towards you from anyone here, ....if there was, no-one would have given you the ages in there posts.
I personally haven't seen any dislike of you, in any of the posts replying to your different threads.
I think you have definately misunderstood maybe the humour side of the English speaking communities, i guess that could be a little hard to understand for members that have English as a second language.
I hope you come back and read the posts attached to this thread, you may just find that you have more friends than you think Sly!!

David.....

Offline wilsbrough

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RE: Leaving...
« Reply #2 on: August 12, 2009, 04:01:14 pm »
Well sorry to see you go, but if it's something you feel you need to do then that's your choice, have to say i have not read all your posts, but i have enjoyed replying to some of the threads you have created, and the age post, if it annoyed people then they would not have added to it. Although i will say I'm a little confused why you think you need to leave, you say you have enjoyed reading and discussing topics here so you must have made a good impression with the majority here and surely that has not changed?, just because some people may not like or agree with things you say then just ignore them, it's not like you have to see them everyday as if you had to work or live with them. Maybe I'm different, if someone dislikes me or does not agree with me, then that up to them, it does not bother me at all, the phrase 'water of a ducks back' springs to mind. But not everone is the same right?

Salut et bons voyages mon ami.
Andy.
Every now and then i get a little bit nervous at the death of all the years have gone by....!

Offline victor-hills

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RE: Leaving...
« Reply #3 on: August 12, 2009, 04:14:20 pm »
Sly was only messing about the nosey bit mate you stay on bord mate be sorry to see you go.
Life is like an onion: You peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep.

Vince G

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RE: Leaving...
« Reply #4 on: August 12, 2009, 04:15:56 pm »
Sly you are our token french guy. This is a title of humor. I think men all over the world men do the same, tease each other. Call names and make fun of in the sense of humor. Maybe because of the english used it's hard for you to understand what is being said? These jokes or teases are always said to people you feel comfortable with saying it too. It's how you say it and who to. If any real harsh words where written here they would have been removed, but they were said in humor.

Your understanding of this is up to you. We or I can not control each word written and don't want to. Perhaps the english spoken here is hard for you to understand but it isn't easy even for us. The different ways of english is apparent. There was a number of posts where we even were teasing the british  and they teased the American's. None of it was taken as a threat against the other. It's done in fun only.

There was a Spanish man on Chnlove that needed help. I wrote him back in spanish because his english was very bad. But I can not do this with every post. It's hard enough posting in english. :icon_biggrin:

You are part of the brotherhood that's why you were teased. It's up to you.
« Last Edit: August 12, 2009, 04:18:19 pm by Vince G »

Offline MLM

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RE: Leaving...
« Reply #5 on: August 12, 2009, 04:43:43 pm »
Sly, I have sent you a PM, I hope you read it before you go.
 I really enjoy your posts and I would not tease you if I did not like you.
TIME IS THE TELLER OF ALL TRUTHS AND THE HEALER OF ALL HURTS

Scottish_Rob

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RE: Leaving...
« Reply #6 on: August 12, 2009, 05:16:03 pm »
I don't know what to say.....

I just know from him, that it was not to do with that bloody thread I started (Nosey)..;-((

but that is not the point, it was done in jest...

I for one will miss him he has wit and had many good and kind things to say, and I have sent him a PM to explain this to him, lets hope he comes back after he reads it... ;-))

Offline David E

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RE: Leaving...
« Reply #7 on: August 12, 2009, 06:22:09 pm »
SLY

dont be such a Frenchman !!!!...We know you are sensitive and kind man....I always read what you write and I hope you always get good information from all of us.

Wise up, stop talking about leaving, have some fun (and serious talk) with us....you are a BRO !!
DavidE

shaun

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RE: Leaving...
« Reply #8 on: August 12, 2009, 06:54:17 pm »
I replied to sly with a PM asking him to stay. I feel a little responsible as I was teasing him a little today.

Shaun

Offline raymond-

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RE: Leaving...
« Reply #9 on: August 12, 2009, 08:43:55 pm »
sly -
I dont know if you've had brothers growing up, but my experience is that
we love and fight and........tease like hell.  We will pile on the kid
brother.  We will play pranks on each other.   We've even made each
other cry on occasion.   All that has helped to form a bond which is
unseparable.  Years down the road, on the occasions when we've
been able to all get together, the reminescing is rich in detail.  And
we depart even richer in our support for each other.

You came here and the group collectively helped you as best they
could, from their keyboards, and across thousands of miles.

Sly, I think it's safe to say that the brothers care about your well
being.   Are you really going to walk away from this?

Don't the guys here deserve some honest and candid communication
about what may have unintentionally caused?  We too, can learn from
this and become better in our actions or communication.

As implied by another earlier, it's this type of honest communication
which is good in a relationship, whether it be men......or prospective
wife from a  different culture.

It's called working things out. c'mon.....  :icon_biggrin:
raymond-
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