TO LIE OR NOT TO LIE?

[stuart barlow]

no Paul  
you'll have to explain that one,dont ring any bells

[Paul Todd]

Hi Stuart
Back in the mid 70's some friends and I set up the "Deeply Vale Peoples Free Festival" not to far from Bury. Kept it together for 3 years.I knew it was a long shot that maybe you went, best attendance was only a few thousand,but you never know. Have you thought about moving to find work? Flt drivers are always in demand down here.I can look around for you if you like.best of luck my friend.

[stuart barlow]

All the 70's i was down plymouth and portsmouth in the RN didn't get back up this way till the 80's
    ive looked for some jobs and south of Birmingham there loads and nowt up here,i will have to think about my options.thanks paul

[JimB]

I would tell her.  It is best to know now how she will handle this stuff.  If she goes then so be it.  There are a lot of other women.  If she stays that also tells you she is a keeper.  That way you know she is not in it for the money.  If she stays, she is well worth the time and effort and money you will need to spend to get her here.  You know she will probably not dump you once she gets here.  She is in it for the long haul.  Besides how can you feel that she is really in love with you or you her if you have not actually been together.  I know you can feel that you could but you cant know 100% until you have been together.  Remember the agencies sometimes "enhance" the letters.  So this is actually a pretty good test.

[Arnold]

Well now , that is a Man thinking with the Head between the Ear's . hehe
You right about not knowing 100% til you meet face to face , but in my case it was close , a 99.99999% sure thing .

[stuart barlow]

Thanks guys, i sort of knew when i wrote it, it didn't feel right,but i suppose its because when i tell her then its 95%certain its going to be the end.
Afterall no job means no future for her,which i fully understand, but still when you put everything into it,its a little difficult.
On a different note,can anybody tell me why a lady can dump you without any explanation?
but if you want to block them your advised to give a reason,why cant it work both ways

[Oiler1]

White lies or not saying something to hurt another even it is true is allowed in my books. Even loving people do it.

[Arnold]

Oiler , loving People do it , yes that's right . But those are Couple's that most likely been married already for year's and do not want their Spouse hurt in any way . So white lies and not mentioning certain things , is okay . Because you have a strong relationship already build . But starting out on that bases is not Kosher with those Lady's . It's like a foundation , the better the Cement you use the stronger and better it will carry the weight of an relationship .

[Oiler1]

Oiler , loving People do it , yes that's right . But those are Couple's that most likely been married already for year's and do not want their Spouse hurt in any way . So white lies and not mentioning certain things , is okay . Because you have a strong relationship already build . But starting out on that bases is not Kosher with those Lady's . It's like a foundation , the better the Cement you use the stronger and better it will carry the weight of an relationship .

Arnold, do you consider a person not telling you things is lying? There may be a lot of things in a person's background they don't want you to know about. For me that's quite ok as I am the same way. Nothing is black and white and I don;t expect anyone to be absolutely prefect or without faults.

[Arnold]

Oiler , I don't think it's lying , not telling you certain things . Like about her / his ex's , for some it's a must know , while other's rather not . So for not telling of your complete past , is not wrong in my Eyes . Why would anyone drag this old luggage into a new relationship or marriage anyway . You and myself and other's know quite well what real Lies are and there not okay to say the least . One just needs to put themself's in the other shoe and go from there . I can truely say . I have not lied to anyone in many year's and I am proud of that fact . It feels good .