Hi Guys.
Ok i thought i had put a nail in this one and it was finished for the time being as i was intending to give it a while longer and see what will develop. I sent her an emf on saturday and i got her reply today, i know she did not get it until monday so the four day wait was not an issue, but her reply, well has kinda raised that red flag again so i will share with you in what she wrote to me and i would appreciate any input, (That's if any guy's are still following this...:icon_cheesygrin:) I will add my message to her first, i thought about editing the soppy stuff out, but then it would not give the whole picture. :icon_biggrin:
''Ni hao my dear Lianne.
Ni hao ma? Thank you for your reply, and i am sorry for my late reply, but i was thinking very hard about what you had said. I am sorry that i put pressure onto you and made you feel uncomfortable, as truly this was not my intention. But yes, trust is the most important thing in a relationship, especially when we are so far from each other right? Although, i was i little confused, as the main reason for wanting the webcam chat was so i can see you beautiful eyes and see your smile when i am talking to you not for you to prove yourself to me. But you say you do not want to use the webcam as you do not to see anything inappropriate? So do you think this is why i suggested the webcam for inappropriate reasons? I would have hoped that you would know me better than that, as i would never do something like that to you.
I understand what you say about using the QQ just for work purposes, and saying that you prefer to call you friends out and see them face to face, but you and i really do not have that option do we? I just thought that we can use all these other ways of communicating to strengthen our bond right? I just think that it is the natural progression between to people who want to develop a strong relationship with each other. But maybe you need more time first right? Maybe it was because of my previous bad experiences here made me push you for more contact too quickly yes? And with your last relationship that effected you so badly, maybe you are now more cautious in new relationship and want to take things slowly right? Its just we have written so much to each other, and we both have been so honest from the start, i feel i know you very well already even in just the month we have been in contact with each other. I know it is early days, but i have such a good feeling about you, i find myself thinking about you everyday at work. i will often drift off into my mind at work and think about how you are and what you are doing. So i will hope to get to know you better first before i ask you anything like this again, and when you are ready, i hope that you will let me ring you sometime on your phone, or send you a little message to your QQ or email saying how much i am thinking of you ok?
One thing you did not say in your last message was your thoughts on adoption? As this is a subject that is close to my heart and is very important to me, as being adopted myself.
So you had to go for a business trip? What was that like? did you have to travel to another part of your country? How long was you away for? And how is your weekend going? Did you manage to get all of your work done, so you do not have to work overtime? As for me, your boy is still in his bed while writing you this message. (laptops are great yes?
) I have to go into town soon as i have to do something for someone i know, then onto the gym again. Your boy wants to be in good shape for his girl, in case she makes him climb the high mountains in China.
And then tonight i am off to a friends for dinner. My parents have gone away for a few days so they are not around this weekend. They have gone to a old country house for a few days down by the coast, something i hope we can do together on day soon.
I shall go now, as i really do have things to do today, but sorry to make you feel uncomfortable and pressurized.
Bao zhong my sweet girl.
Yours,
Andy.
xx ''
Her reply...
''Ni hao Andy,
Wo hen hao, dan shi hen lei, xie xie! l hope you all fine and everything goes well too.
Sorry for haven't give you an answer last about the thoughts on adoption, as a matter of fact, l haven't had many thoughts about this, and l did feel puzzled about what you mean when asking this question, do you think l will care about your attorneyship? To tell you the truth, l've been taken part in the salvations of the orphans before, l do poor them that lost their own parents when they was still little and need love and help most, so you should be a lucky one that was adopted by a very good couple, and grown up in such a great warm family atmosphere, do you think so? Tha's why you should cherish and nourish them as much as you can in your sparetime, see?
As a good normal human being, l think we should always be kind, nice, positive and optimistic to life, trust is the essential and most important in keeping any relationship well, we couldn't keep our mind staying in the old age, staying in the terrible life experience before, we have to look forward instead of look back!!!! Anyhow, l do hope you can understand my mind, my thinking!
Now l was out in Harbin in the Northeasy China which was far far away from Guangzhou, really cold and the hard work did make me feel crazy exhausted, l just hope to have more rest and sleep, but l still need some more time to adjust my biological clock here, have a nice day anyway.
Bao zhong,
Lianne ''
I find this reply, well apart from it being the shortest letter she has written to me, i find it a little vague, almost like she has not read my letter to her. There is no mention of the direct contact, even if it is in the future. I would have thought that she would have at least said, ''yes lets give it a little more time first and then lets see'' I feel like this is a letter written by someone else and not her. What do the brothers think? Am i just being paranoid now? I just think that if she had said to me about a bad experience she had in coming to England in meeting her man and she would like a little more contact just to be sure it will not happen again, then i would be ''Here is my email/phone number/ QQ id, when we have some time maybe we can chat direct so you know i am genuine'' But her last letter just seems to dismiss the whole subject. Do you agree? Or like i say, do the majority think i am just being paranoid now? Oh, n i don't know if you think it makes a difference, but FYI, she has been on Chnlove since May 2008.
