Author Topic: when did you or did you guys ever  (Read 2343 times)

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Robin Tsao

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when did you or did you guys ever
« on: March 29, 2009, 03:19:30 pm »
OK, experience members, when did you guys discuss about financial stuff in your relationship, or did you guys ever discuss about it, I made good money but unfortunately my expenses are killing me, I got a kid in college, another is one year away, I?ll discuss about it with my girl, when the time is right, but I?m trying to gauge when is the right time? We only been corresponding about a month now, I?m not getting any younger, I?m already 48. Also question for guys that got their woman over to their country, how is your wife adjusting to her new life in a new country? I know it?ll take a while for her to get used to a new country and it?ll be a few years before she can speak the language, get around by herself and stuff like that,  when you go to work what does she do to keep herself from being bored to death?
Robin

Offline Bob

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Re: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #1 on: March 29, 2009, 03:41:59 pm »
Hi Robin,

                    I have been with my lady for almost a year now, we got married back in September of 2008. I have visited China twice now and presently we are going through the immigration process. In my personal opinion, since you have basically just started your relationship with your lady, perhaps you should wait at least another month or two. Get to know more about your lady and develop your relationship more with her before talking money matters, you want to make sure she is interested in you and not about money issues.

I also am concerned when my lady arrives to my country how will it affect her. Of course it will be a huge culture shock to her, so I will make every effort to make it easier for her to adapt. I plan on bringing her to our "China town" often, she will be able to see and talk with some of her own people and will be able to buy things there that she would otherwise have difficulty finding elsewhere, such as certain food stuff. I will take several weeks vacation time when she arrives to show her around and help her ease into things here, when I return to work I will ask my sisters to drop bye the house and take her out shopping or do women stuff together. I do not want my wife stuck at home alone, she will go crazy looking at the four walls. My wife already has her drivers license to drive in China, so I will look into getting her drivers license here in my country and give her the car when I am at work.

I wish you the best of luck, please keep us updated.

Offline Carl

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Re: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #2 on: March 29, 2009, 05:03:10 pm »
I think that is great advice, Vince. There is no reason the agency needs to be made aware of a person's financial situation.

Arnold

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Re: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #3 on: April 05, 2009, 11:24:26 am »
In my situation , we never really talked about Money itself , but she is well aware of how my three Trip's and the all that goes along with has cost me . She has mentioned that herself in one of her letter's to me . Not that I have told her in $$$ amount's , not going to do that , even though she is worth every $ of course . She also is aware of the bad Economy here in Calif . especially . She also know's I'm not rich or wealthy . I realize she has money to take care of herself well , having owned two Aquarium Stores , which she sold after we met , so we could have the free time that we did have on my Trip's . Now work's for her brother as an Accountant , for which she studied in Tokyo along with learning the japanese language . She also let's me know that she wants to go to work here in the States , so we can have a comfortable Life together , in her own words , but she does not drive a car , so this will be the first obstacle to get over , ones she has somewhat adjusted to Life here , which is not going to be hard , since she is used to being away from her Family for over five years , and she knows the western way's pretty well already . Let say , that is what I'm banking on , but we will see ?

Offline Ed W

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Re: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #4 on: April 05, 2009, 11:37:47 am »
After about a month of EMF's she started talking about marriage and then is when I thought it was the right time to lower the boom and see if she was serious. I painted the most unatractive aspects of my finances, which are pretty grim being child supported and alimonied to the eyeballs. I figured if she wasn't serious she'd bail or at least rethink it. Instead she wrote back with the most amazing response of support, saying when we marry... my problems become her problems and we will find solutions together.

My opinion is if you intend to marry her, she needs to know everything. It's family after all and to the better or worse, you'll be dealing with this stuff together.
Alright earthlings, what form do you want me to take?....How about a taco, ....that craps icecream?  My trip to china

Offline Neil

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Re: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #5 on: April 05, 2009, 12:14:54 pm »
Quote from: "Vince G"
Child support has me strapped and whipped to a table.  :o

Hey Vince.  Just let her know about the child support.  I don't know if it's quite the same in China but as long as she understands where a part of your income goes each month she won't have unrealistic expectations.  My girls are 17 and 16 so there's a light at the end of my tunnel.  Til they get married of course.  lol
...as irresistible as chocolate

Offline David

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Re: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #6 on: April 06, 2009, 02:01:55 pm »
Ouch Vince! :(  I hope you get that worked out ASAP.  So you can have passport in hand my friend! :D

Offline Willy The Londoner

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RE: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #7 on: December 01, 2009, 11:22:50 pm »
I have been living in China since June and I have never ever discussed finances with any of the women that I have encountered.  (which means Rob I have not picked up any on the streets).

Even Angel, who I have been with for three months has no idea of my finances.  All she knows is that on some days my internet busines has earned me more in a day than she has in a month.

Vince is right - never ever and I mean NEVER EVER mention your finances in an EMF.   The agencies hone into that like a stingray missile.  They see just what the potential is and have been known to change the ladies contract to a higher figure due to the information they have gleaned.   This is something that occurred at one agency at least from information from a translator.

Willy
Willy The Lpndoner

Now in my 12th year living here,

Offline maxx

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RE: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #8 on: December 02, 2009, 01:21:16 am »
What Willy said.Ive also seen this done.Under no circumstances discuss money in Emf.

Offline rhoodtsao

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RE: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #9 on: December 06, 2009, 01:55:55 pm »
Money can't buy love, but make life easier, I stole that line from a girl profile.:icon_cheesygrin:
Robin

Offline RegnisTheGreat

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RE: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #10 on: December 06, 2009, 02:31:00 pm »
was this profile on chinalove?

Offline rhoodtsao

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RE: when did you or did you guys ever
« Reply #11 on: December 06, 2009, 05:38:14 pm »
yes, she's a cutie, but I forgot who it was.
Robin