To Webcam or not to Webcam. That is the question.

[shaun]

I know.  I know.  I know.  This will be a controversial thread but I think it needs to be covered.  I was inspired by RobertB from Aussie land when he responded to one of my threads about webcamming with my beloved.  So, yes, Robert if people get upset about this I am blaming you. :icon_cheesygrin:

I know there will be disagreements here.  There are those who went before us without webcam and found their soul mate and live very happy lives.  I respect and honor what you have done.  But things change.

The most consistent thing in life is change.  Everything is always changing and those who really get ahead in this world are those who can adapt and accept change to their own benefit.  With that in mind I want to talk about webcaming.

To start off I will say that since we have this option available to us I think it needs to be an absolute in forwarding a relationship with the woman you are getting to know.  My learning curve with Peggy has increased dramatically vs the relationship with Pinky. (The first woman I was interested in.)

Many of the issues we have with things like is it the translators falsifying letters or adding to letters are completely out the window. It is you and your woman.

You can read her emotions, her initial response to a question or a thought. By that I mean you can tell if she liked it or is kind of angered by it.

You can see her personality come out and if she is the one a bond begins to emerge that is beyond anything I think one can get on EMF.

Where I constantly had issues with Pinky is that many questions were not answered on webcam you can re-ask quickly if she does not answer and see her reaction to the question.  You can better assess by seeing her response and to whether you should stand firm on an answer or let it go.

Another issues was the language change. When you are looking at her typing or talking, you know who it is.

I have seen many of you on this site and on the other one ask about sex.  How you should approach her and how will she be.  I initially led Peggy down a winding road of questions leading to "the question."  She was not offended and said to me that to her it was too early for such a discussion.  I could tell by her body language that she meant what she said and she would be ready to discuss when she thought it was appropriate.  We have.

The webcam has been crucial to the development of our relationship to the point that I cannot see doing anything else.

When we have such technology available to us. We need to use it to our advantage.

Shaun

[RobertBfrom aust]

Yes Shaun , I thoroughly agree with all that you have said , whereas not 2 years ago webcam was only an option now it is a must , I will admit it has made me very lazy though as Ying has a program on her computer that almost instantly coverts my English to Chinese as I deliver a sentence on either Yahoo or QQ she also types in in Mandarin and it comes through in English .
 Yesterday she went to look at a new housing complex , all I can say is bloody beautiful , a little out of ChongQing , but more than equal to anything from anywhere in the world , couple of hundred apartments and houses and very secure , a reasonable house for about 55,000 Aussie dollars and monthly fees of 90 yuan a month , ying has already uploaded a number of photo,s to me at the same time as us discussing each photo , so today she is discussing with her dad as she will be selling her city apartment if he approves , all done via yahoo in a matter of hours , regards Ying and Robert .

[shaun]

Shaun,

Welcome to the world of webcamming!  LOL...I think you need to go back to emf's!

Butt,

:icon_rolleyes: It will never happen.

Shaun

[Paul Todd]

I'm with Shaun and Robert on this one. If you can do it, webcam's should be the way to go. Like Shaun said webcam's give you instant feedback and her body language will tell you more about her than a whole bunch of EMF's will. When you need that intimacy, or you need to keep your relationship afloat, webcams can save the day.
They can also sink the ship too! Just as your watching her she sure as hell is studying you!  My wife saved all our webcams and played them back latter! Oh, and showed them to all her family and friends as well! :-/
One drawback to all this technology is that it makes me feel old, especialy when I have to ask my kids about it! There is something about writing letters that I miss.
Robert your right some of those new appartment complex's are really nice, underfloor heating too!:icon_cheesygrin:

[Danny]

Yes Shaun , I thoroughly agree with all that you have said , whereas not 2 years ago webcam was only an option now it is a must

Yes I agree too. If I was starting from scratch, I would not even think for a moment of becoming entangled with someone who wasn't able to correspond via webcam.

Some women have really good reasons for not being able to get access to a webcam. That's sad, but the fact of the matter, is that there are now a whole lot of women who are are able to get access to one. A marriage is a big commitment. It's one of the biggest things you'll ever decide It's much more likely to work out when you and your woman have a webcam.

It's a pity you just can't rely on emf mails on their own. You "should" be able to rely on them, but if we've established anything in the time we've been together, emf mails on their own are a risky course of action. You can get lucky, but it's like driving around without a seatbelt . . . it's an entirely unnecessary risk.

[rockycoon]

I guess I would have to get a new laptop then with a camera built in with a mic.  I don't know much about webcam yet, but I'll have to look into it to keep up with you guy's.  Robert, do we both have to have the same program, and what is QQ? is it a program that we would have to buy or some sort of tel-comm we have to subscribe to....lost and in th dark:huh:

[shaun]

Rock,

You can buy a web cam at Walmart for around $30.00. It will have a built in microphone.  Does you laptop have speakers?  The woman over at blossoms.com will ask you if you web cam.  I will let Robert answer you about QQ.

Shaun

[brett]

Webcams are crucial. I would not consider visiting someone I hadn't seen on webcam. Seeing your lady's mannerisms and hearing her voice - they are so important :icon_cheesygrin:.

[RobertBfrom aust]

Thanks for the handball Shaun , I am not a tech smart guy but someone will come to Rocks aid with the lead in to Q Q directly , , Rock do not forget all pc's do not have built in webcams , Shaun is right just get a good one at a local store , but make sure it will operate with your laptop system , and once you are on Q Q you may find a lot of eligible ladies from China wanting to practice their English , I have 2 families who I regularly talk to and now the 2 of us have somewhere to stay in other Chinese cities , regards Ying and Robert .

[RobertBfrom aust]

Thanks Jim , I had a quick look and could not find , regards Ying and Robert . oh and I also agree with your other post along with Shaun to B

[shaun]

Don,

I used and prefer yahoo messenger over QQ.  Peggy does too.

Shaun

[Rhonald]

Yahoo...ing right now with my wife :icon_cheesygrin:

Even though we only started after my December trip, I agree with you Shaun, a moving, talking picture is worth a thousand EMF`s

[brett]

I've used QQ, Skype and MSN for webcam sessions. All have been a bit flaky at times. QQ is our preferred tool. MSN's webcam has too many dropped audio problems, and Skype's not great either.

[David5o]

It doesn't matter what system you choose or prefer, use of this facility has now become an absolute must have!! This will obviously be of more benifit to those that can converse in a common language, but even those that can't, ...it can be fun trying, by using the many different translation programs available to them.....

As many people have mentioned on this thread, there is nothing like seeing your ladies body language and expressions when face to face on webcam.

In many cases it's not going to be an alternative to translated EMF's/emails, but more of an additional form of communication, with the idea of progressing your relationship to a higher level and bringing you both closer together!!

David.....

[heckerd]

Get a webcam session as soon as possible as its more personal and you can get her reaction to certain questions or answers.