Chen,
I would love to hear your response to the following thread.
Today I came across a piece of news on a Chinese news website. It's a long one published on May 2nd and made up of 4 pages (click 1 2 3 4 in the end of every page). The general tone of this article is criticism because editors decided to do the investigations and wrote this article out of complaints from 5 ladies who were cheated by two companies practicing overseas matchmaking. Both are already shut down now.
I'll put part of it into English for your information.
In page one it analyses the motivations of Chinese women to find husbands abroad. From the mouths of ladies themselves, they do so for reasons such as "being divorced with children, it is almost impossible to find a Chinese man who can accept us and love us with true heart, perhaps we can find more chances in forgiven countries. It is said Laowai (foreigners) are more open-minded about age and family background, etc."
From the mouth of a government official, "Money and Visa" is the strongest motive. He said his department received 16 complaints about matchmaking. A major one of them, involving more than 50 people and 2.4 million RMB, was about overseas matchmaking. He said those who were cheated had held the dreams of simply "marrying abroad", others were for visas or better futures of their children.
Page two.
Journalists investigated 10 matchmaking companies in Shenzhen. When they were inquired about overseas matchmaking, 8 companies promised profitable and instant results, 2 declared overseas matchmaking is illegal in China but implied service in overseas friends making.
A company named "Yuanfen" boasts an overall service team including, "translators, consultants, consulting psychologist, overseas cooperative institution, branches in Hong Kong". A lady can often have 4 men writing with her.
A company named "China-wife" showed astonishing confidence of their abundant resource of foreign men. They said whenever a lady joins their service, she'll be "dazzled" by so many men to choose. She can keep choosing until she finds the right one.
A company named "Caizijiaren" listed different kinds of service with fees ranging from 3000 to 50000. A lady can choose either 3000 per month or a total payment of 50000 till success. Most of their clients choose the latter. A company named "Xinliangyuan" has their standard as 15800 for 4 month.
Page Three presents two individual cases narrated by two ladies themselves.
Case 1
Narrator, Huang Ying, 45 years old, from Guangdong, accountant,
"On a morning of 2006.5, I saw an ad about overseas matchmaking at the gate of our company. After reading it, I was attracted by the "wonderful life" described in it. I'm no young but still single, why not have a try? I called the company and asked if a woman in 42 like me had chance. They said age is no problem. The next evening, I visited there with a friend. The moment I stepped into it, I was dazzled. Photos of Chinese girls and foreign men hung all over the room. On a wall was projection of endless success stories. Witnessing other people's happiness, I felt an urge in my heart too. The company has about 600 square meters, more than 20 employees and business license hung on the wall. After hearing some introductions, I quickly decided to pay 15000 for a "Gold" level service.
The next day after payment, they brought me to take pictures. They said my pictures would be put up on overseas websites where foreign men will visit. If they are interested, they'll send mails to me. In the first month, I received less than 10 letters and I had no access of email account and password. Translators there wrote and sent introduction letters for me, then translate replies to me. But no replies carried satisfactory candidates. They either are too old or have too many children. No one can meet my requirement. At that time I recalled advice from a staff to update my service level to "Diamond". Then I paid another 33000 to do so. So I paid 48000 in all. This time, I made more effort. I wrote introduction letters myself. Then the translator put it into English and sent back to me for examination. With my consent, she sent them out. Those days I went there every day to check new letters but was disappointed every time.
Finally in Dec of 2009, a Laowai was coming to visit me. He's called Robert, from America. This man has a reasonable age, 56. I was very nervous the first time. To help communication, I bought an E-dictionary with 2000 RMB. Robert told me he was there for business and would stay 10 days. I picked him up when he arrived but didn't see him off. During that 10 days, only for one day we were together. I brought him to "World Window" and "Splendid China". We lost contact immediate after he went back.
The next half year saw no progress. And I sometimes came across quarrels between other clients and their boss. My inquiries about it were either denied or evaded by other translators. I felt there were something tricky and demanded a refund of my service fee. But they said I had enjoyed service more than 1 year so no refund could be made.
Latter on, through other members I finally knew we were all cheated. Overseas matchmaking is illegal. I haven't told my family this experience and dare not to do so now. I believe matchmaking no more."
Case 2
Narrator, Hong Yaping, 37, from Fujian, has a 5 years old child.
I have once been cheated by a Chinese man and began to develop interest in foreign men. One day I received a text message from a company of overseas matchmaking. I hesitated for a while, but when I think of my child, I decided to have a try.
In January 2008, they told me they have arranged a 40+ businessman from America to meet me. He’d come to Luohu from Hong Kong. We decide to meet in a hotel at 8:00. I arrived half an hour earlier. About 8:00, an Indian in his 70s came to me and I realized the so called American businessman is this one. I hurried to end our conversation and rushed away. When I reached the gate, a staff of the hotel told me this Indian grandpa went there every evening with different girls. I never turned up again after that evening.
One of my friends told me a more astonishing experience of hers. Her agency arranged a meeting between her and an Australian man. The man seemed nice and they enjoyed a good time. So my friend asked him if he had any intention of marriage. The man was shocked. He said he was already married and had children. Later one he told my friend he knew boss of the agency. Before his business visit that time, that boss had offered to arrange a Chinese woman to have some “fun” with him during his stay. He himself had no knowledge of matchmaking. My friend said she never believes in matchmaking any more.”
Page Four
The editor summarized the process of an overseas matchmaking scam.
Step 1. Send out oceans of pamphlets and ads.
Step 2. One on one promotion, with photos and business licenses.
Step 3, Collect large amounts of fees but offer ambiguous contracts.
Step 4, Put up photos of ladies onto overseas websites, receive and write letters with foreign men instead of ladies, conceal mail accounts and web sites from ladies.
Step 5, Keep correspondence going endlessly or arrange swindlers to meet ladies.
Step 6, Work out excuses to deny refund demands.
After interviewing many people from different government departments, the editor learned this conclusion. Overseas matchmaking is illegal in China but there is no clear definition of it and no department clearly deployed to supervise this business. So this trade is in a vacuum of supervision.
Finally, 20 female interviewees gave their different reasons to find a foreign husband, which are summarized into 15.
1. Western men are generally rich so that I can live a comfortable life.
2. I can have greed card through overseas marriage and see a more colorful world.
3. Western men are generally more handsome than Chinese men.
4. Inter-race marriage usually produces lovely mix-blooded babies.
5. Western men usually have better sexuality.
6. Western men are usually more considerate to wives and more gentle.
7. Relationships between daughter-in-law and mother-in law would be simpler in marriage life of foreign countries.
8. Western men seem honest and reliable.
9. Western men are generous, with less sexism.
10. In a western styled marriage a couple can keep identity of each other and meanwhile respect each other.
11. Western men are romantic.
12. Western culture offers better chances for education of children.
13. Western men are straight-forward.
14. Inter-cultural marriage presents chances of clashes between two minds and brains. I can learn a lot from it.
15. Western men think more of family. They put wife and children first. Chinese men put their parents first.
