Danish guy with Hunan girl - I have a question

[Henrik]

Dear members,

I just want to say hello, and wish you all luck with your love :-)

My name is Henrik, and I was born in 1974 in Odense/Denmark. Educated as a lawyer, but today I have a company who is manufacturing items in China and sell it to Europe. Apartment in Shenzhen, office in Xiamen and factory in Shangzhou.

First I had a good Danish marriage for 10 years and got two fantastic kids. The marriage ended, and now I'm with my sweet Chinese girlfriend Ying. (Pictures attached)

I met my beautiful Hunan girl in Shenzhen in November 2009, and today we share an apartment in Nanshan, Shenzhen. When we met 6 months ago her English was poor, but today it is almost fluent.

To the new members I would like to say that, yes there is a cultural difference and sometimes we have to do things we think is wrong. Such as pay dowry etc. But believe me, you future wife is willing to do things she think is taboo-breaking too.

To the old members who live with their Chinese wife in their western country. I have a question. Are your wife happy? Is it difficult for her to find friends among westerners? I fear that people could think of me like; Rich white guy, getting young poor Chinese girl as a house slave...  In here we know it is not the truth. Can you follow me? I don't care what people think, but I fear it can be difficult for our Chinese wife to feel 100% equal in our western country. Maybe I'm wrong, I hope so, but I have decided with my girlfriend that we in the future try to live in both Denmark and China. In China she is in control and she is so strong and independent. I fear she would maybe not be like that in Denmark. Any ideas or experiences?





And then a picture of me sailing outside Xiamen :-)

[Martin]

First off, welcome to the forum.  Another Hunan girl married.  There is something about these Hunan girls.  Where in Hunan is she from?

[Arnold]

Henrik , also welcome you to the Forum .
My Wife is here with me now in California for almost six month's and she loves it here . The only thing she hates is , the thing that she needs to learn how to drive a Car and by that I mean to get a Driver's License . She failed twice and it did leave her pretty upset .  To the point of given it up , saying it's personal and they don't want her to drive here ... because she's Chinese . I try everything to convince her this is NOT so . That it's about Money , they need and have found a way to do it . Fail most of the Test's and let them pay some more . I truely wish I had solid proof of this , but my Gut feeling knows I'm right .
Is my Wife Happy ? You bet !!! Ever heard of a two year Honeymoon and counting ? Well now you did .
Has she trouble making western Friends ? Hell no !!! Everybody in my Family , former In-laws , our Neighbor's , my Friends all love Her .
I really think , she loves and cares for me soo much .. it really doesn't matter where we live/are...as long we are together . She is so much more .. then I would ever have dreamed of , starting this Journey two years ago .

Henrik , please do get in Contact with Hajo ( one of our original's FaceBook member ) who also lives in Denmark and just brought His Wife over there . Sure he can tell you , how she is adjusting to the new surroudings .

PS: Sorry , also thanks for the Photo's ! She is lovely and you are ... well So So ! Haha

[Henrik]

That I call a quick response haha !!

Martin, Ying is from Zhangjiajie in Hunan :-)

Arnold, I'm very happy to hear your story. I really want to make my future wife happy. It sounds like I don't need to meet the troubles halfway!

[maxx]

Henrik welcome to the forum.Very nice pictures of your wife.To answer your question.My wife has lived in the U.S. for over 3 years.She has had very little trouble adapting  to American culture.And she has made allot of new friends.Since moving to the U.S.

The part of the U.S. that we live in.Very few people ever give me and my wife a second look.some people do ask how me and my wife met.I tell them the story.Of how we met.And That is usually the end of the questions.We live outside of a city of 30,00 people. where there is allot of mixed marriage's.With allot of different races and cultures.There is Latins 3 different Native American tribes,African Americans,Whites,Samoans and a few Asians from all over Asia.So here we are just part of the crowed.

My wife has traveld across the southern part of the U.S. with me.And it is the same.Nobody really cares.If it is a mixed marraige.

[RobertBfrom aust]

Henrik , Congratulations , you have the best of both worlds , I am sure that you will have no problems in gaining a business visa for your beloved to visit with you to Denmark , and that would show her what your country is like , with all the modern communications we now have at our finger tips , my significant other just gets on the computer or her laptop for a face to face with whomever in China , and the other day she ordered some beautiful new curtains via a girlfriend in Shenyang , 3 weeks later they were here , and no she does not miss China ,I am keeping her busy here and she has been working since the first week that she and her daughter arrived , but we will be back there again just after Christmas , regards Robert .

[Henrik]

I'm very happy I joined this forum. You are all so positive and optimistic!

Maxx, In the US you see mixed couples everywhere. Here you do not. But just like you I think it would be no problem. People are generally very open minded here. But it is still very nice to hear that your wife adapt so well. Thank you for sharing!

Robert, yes my next step is to provide her with a business visa so she can visit Denmark. She will go home to her hometown and get a passport soon. She can travel between China and Denmark every second month if she want. So I guess she will not miss China. I need to travel a lot, and I'm looking forward to have her as a travel partner :-D

[temur72]

While not having met the girl I will be going visit yet that is something I have been concerned about as well. Thankfully Calgary has a large (not as large as Vancouver's) Chinese population. So if things go well, and she eventually comes to Canada she will have plenty of people to talk to and interactt with in a culturally familiar manner ( although it will be more biased towards Cantonese then Mandarin )

[Scottish_Rob]

Henrik welcome to the brotherhood, your lady is lovely..:icon_cheesygrin:

[shaun]

Too funny Henrik...  Here is Rob > :blush:

It could happen to anyone.  :icon_cheesygrin:

[ttwjr32]

never could spell  lol!!!!

Henrik congrats your close so if you and your lady ever get to GZ let
Sara and me know we can get together

[Henrik]

Henrik congrats your close so if you and your lady ever get to GZ let
Sara and me know we can get together

Thank you, you are very kind, we are often in GZ :-)

[ttwjr32]

next time your here pm me before hand and i will give you my number
nd we could get together   we always welcome get togethers with other fellow
members and westerners with their chinese ladies

[Martin]

Like Arnold said, Hajo is in Denmark, and his wife is with him...he could certainly tell you how things are going with his wife.  There is also Peter in Sweden who has his wife with him as well.  I believe both wives are quite enjoying their new countries.

[Henrik]

Martin, Thanks, Yes, Denmark, Norway and Sweden are very comparable :-)
Ted, I will, thank you, looking forward to meet you!