Church wedding in Guangzhou

[Irishman]

I am not a religious guy. But I was brought up as a Roman Catholic.
I haven't gone to mass in a long time but I count myself as a "good person". I try to be nice to everyone and quick to forgive and forget.
I am not sure about the whole creation thing but i do know the feeling I had when I made my first confession, the feeling that maybe there is something unknown.

If I am to be judged at the end of my days i would like to think i have lived a good life.
I would like to have a church wedding with Sunny. I would like to declare to the unknown that i will take care of her in sickness and in health etc...

I asked her if we could have a little church ceremony in Guangzhou but she thinks we both have to be the same religion and she has none.
I have to admit, while I will be thrilled to have the red book with her, I think i want to declare my devotion to her to God..should he exist..

Anyone had a church wedding in China before?
Are there any multi-denominational churches in Guangzhou in particular where we could marry from a religious perspective?

[Vince G]

I do not know for certain about the Roman Catholic churches in China (or elsewhere) but here in the US you both have to be Roman Catholic and if you were divorced? you can't marry there either. What you can do after your married (red book) you can have a "Blessing" from the church. It's a mini wedding.

You can check other christian churches? They may be happy to do it? It's all the same God.

[maxx]

Irish there is Catholic churches in GZ.Like Vince said I don't know if they will marry you and Sunny.Because she is not Catholic.But what you can do is find a justice of the piece in China.Or Waite until Sunny comes to Ireland.And find a Justice of the piece there.With a justice of the piece.You can pretty much write your own wedding vows.And do what you want within the confines of the laws of man.

[RegnisTheGreat]

I'm a former Catholic and I married a agnostic girl the first time (while I was Catholic). The official policy is that its OK as long as you vow to raise you kids Catholic. Also beware that the "Catholic Church" in China is not the same as the "Catholic Church" in the West. The head of the "Catholic Church" in China is the CPC, not Ratzinger.

[Vince G]

Allot of "Former" Catholics here? My first wedding was in the Catholic church, the second (for reasons stated above) was in a lutheran church. I know the US Catholic churches have taken flak from the Vatican for trying to be to lacked? So all the Catholic churches in different counties are not the same with the self given laws.

As Mike had it. What is the difference where it is? Your vowing from your heart.

[Jason B]

As Mike had it. What is the difference where it is? Your vowing from your heart.

My ex wife is catholic, me no religion and we were married in a Catholic Church just to keep her parents happy I think.  But beware of the Catholic Churches policy of attending pre-marriage courses etc and then they want you sign a piece of paper saying you will bring up your children Catholic.  Well they did where I was married anyway.

But I intend on doing what feels right for Wendy and me......well once she says that she will marry me....find out in a couple of days time.

[ttwjr32]

Ronan,

there are churches of every denomination in Guangzhou. in fact there is a catholic church in Haizhu square which is about a 10 minute walk from exit b on the subway  they have english services on saturday afternoon and sunday morning. its quite a beautiful church that i believe was built in the 1600's  we go there for services when in Guangzhou  next time im over there i will gather some info for you

[Irishman]

Thanks guys, the more I think about this the more I would like to try to do it. For some reason I cannot get out my head, I feel we will not be properly married unless it is in the eyes of the creator.
Ted if you could look into it that would be fantastic thanks. If we can have it there than I hope you and your lovely wife could attend as our honoured guests, and that scallywag Willy if he is in town too   

[Paul Todd]

Irish,

She doesn't need to be Catholic, and the dispensation that you have to get to marry her is easy and there are usually no issues if she's a baptised Christian. If she's not a baptised Christian then you'll need a dispensation of cult which is slightly more difficult to obtain.

But she will have to promise to attend a pre-marriage course (it's usually not overly Catholic and it's not a Catechism class). She would also have to promise to not prevent you from practising your Catholic faith and she would have to promise to allow any children to be brought up in the Catholic faith. She won't have to attend Mass or anything, she just mustn't prevent you from taking the kids to church and Catechism.

Each church has its own rules regarding the ceremony. With a mixed religion marriage, most are more than happy to only do the wedding ceremony bit and to leave out the Liturgy of the Eucharist. Some churches are stricter than others with the rule about the bride and her bridesmaids having no strapless dresses, you'd need to check this with your church.

The Code of Canon Law allows this by dispensation only. Here are the requirements for dispensation:

    The local ordinary can grant a permission of this kind if there is a just and reasonable cause. He is not to grant it unless the following conditions have been fulfilled:

       1. the Catholic party is to declare that he or she is prepared to remove dangers of defecting from the faith and is to make a sincere promise to do all in his or her power so that all offspring are baptized and brought up in the Catholic Church;
       2. the other party is to be informed at an appropriate time about the promises which the Catholic party is to make, in such a way that it is certain that he or she is truly aware of the promise and obligation of the Catholic party;
       3. both parties are to be instructed about the purposes and essential properties of marriage which neither of the contracting parties is to exclude. (CIC 1125)

I would get in touch with the leader of the church you intend to get married in and work out the best plan for getting your dispensation with that person. I'm a Buddhist so I find this all rather interesting. Best of luck..................

[ttwjr32]

Irish,

i will go see what i can find out when i get back to Guangzhou. im always over there buying supplies as they have everything there to buy both chinese and western. example coffee 2 lbs can    in grocery store---  135 rmb  over there it is only 75rmb the church sits at the end of all the shops as you walk around  thats how i found it when i came to the end of the street and was going to walk up the other side

[Irishman]

Sounds good Ted, i won't be there for another 9 weeks anyhow so no rush, I'm enjoying reading your Beijing trip thread in the mean time 

[Irishman]

Wonderful update to this.
My qin ai de has done some researching on this and looks like we are gonna get married in Shishi Sacred Heart Cathedral on September 25th.
I just need to get my baptismal cert and a letter from my local church to confirm I am single and not divorced and Sunny will arrange the rest with them.

We are super excited about this to say the least!
If any of the bro's (or sis's i guess!) are in Guangzhou on September 25th then you are more than welcome to attend the joyous occasion, and the meal afterwards, I'll post more details as we get them. It looks like its going to be the perfect wedding for us, more than i ever dreamed possible.

 

[Paul Todd]

Wow, looks a great place!  a cathedral!  Congratulations to both of you. Will you have a choir and the full works?

[Irishman]

I dont know about a choir, I suspect my "donation" will be large enough without that!
Sunny says they told her she will need to do confession before the wedding which has me thinking, will she need to be baptised first? Anyone care to guess?, this is a Roman Catholic church which is my religion too.

[Paul Todd]

It will be amazing! Married in a cathedral! I bet  the acoustics's in the place will be superb, that's why I was asking about the choir, do you think you will be able to choose the hymns.
If Sunny is organising this then she must understand and be willing to undergo every thing that's required for the two of you to get hitched. Some woman you have got there Irish!