Living with the distance and waiting..

[Irishman]

Its Friday evening I'm alone and yet out there somewhere she is...she would hold my hand, smile at me , laugh with me, make me happy..but she can't because she isn't here...

I think I find weekend nights especially tough, i see my friends with their girlfriends and wife's and mine is 7 hours separated and and several 1000 miles.

How do you guys cope with the wait to be with your beloved?, what do you do?, i think I need to take up a hobby or something as normal socialising just plain makes me miserable right now because she isnt participating beside me.

Sorry for the sad topic, I'm feeling a little lonely tonight.

[Rhonald]

I feel your sadness Ronan. It can be tough to distract yourself. Luckily I keep some what busy taking care of my son. But yes in spring time when you see others about with their sweethearts, the loneliness clings to the heart echoing like a foghorn in the morning mist.

Hangout with your friends and share in their joys. This gives us the strength and patience to endure. After all, this is the price that us romantics must pay. Nothing worthwhile is ever gained easily. Raise a pint to raise your spirits - we all share in your ordeal.

[Spruik]

Ronan,

Come help me with my new shed . You will enjoy nature and the crisp superclean mountain air.

Being close to nature really helps. Seriously. Go somewhere on week-ends.

Toon.

[Neil]

I've spent the last few weekends at my parent's place, helping them out, but mostly discussing my new life to come.  They are surprisingly encouraging of this fantastic adventure.  I've also taken up paintball for the exercise and male bonding.  I'm finding that hanging out with the guys is real good for the soul and helps build strong character (if they're the right guys I guess).  I think it is very important to have a life outside of our lovers and wives.  Toon's right too, nature really does help.  I try to watch the sunset and dream of my chance in China to watch the sun rise.

[Martin]

Damn Ronan...don't be posting threads like this...of course, this is the point of the brotherhood.  I find these nights hard as well.  Especially when I know where she is, or what she is doing.  I want nothing more than to be with her.

I agree with Rhonald...Nothing worthwhile is ever gained easily.

[Vince G]

Well D'UH! you haven't noticed we're all here? Your not alone on this night or others. As for being with my lady? The money keeps going out and less coming in, so I can't even get an idea of when we will be together?

[Martin]

Vince, I know the feeling.  i was hoping to be at work tonight...but with the damned economy, I am not making any money right now either.

[Arnold]

Irish , I tell you what I do to pass the time . Get up at 05:30 ... come home after 19:00 , shower , cook and eat and be on here with all of you Guy's , asking .. how , why , where , howcome , what's next , oh no ..why me , that is how I spend my spare time .
 
But , I must say .. I love it or else I would not be in this situation .. would I ?

The other few minutes in my Life , I have to myself , I write or call my Qing or my two Sister's . Sometimes I forget my own Family with all of this . In the long run that's , that's not good .

[Paul Todd]

In this classic poem Li Bai writes...

Amongst the flowers I am alone with my pot of wine drinking by myself;

then lifting my cup I asked the moon to drink with me,

its reflection and mine in the wine cup, just the three of us;

then I sigh for the moon cannot drink,

and my shadow goes emptily along with me never saying a word;

with no other friends here, I can but use these two for company;

in this time of happiness, I too must be happy with all around me;

then if I dance it is my shadow that dances along with me, while still not drunk,

I am glad to make the moon and shadow into friends,

but then when I have drunk too much we all part.

Yet these are friends I can count on,

these who have no emotion whatsoever;

I hope that one day we three will meet again, deep in the milky way.

A natural state of elation

[Irishman]

That's a beautiful poem Paul thanks.
My girl is away at a wedding and then off with friends for the Dragon Boat festival so haven't talked to her in a few days. I really miss our daily little chats, surprised how much it affects me when I don't have that.
The money side of it sucks too..I have four weeks vacation time left, i could make four more week long trips there this year, could do some overtime and make that into six weeks probably..but my credit card couldn't handle the strain ..but my heart sure would like it!
Thanks to all you guys for being here, we really are all in this together, its great being able to talk about this stuff with other men and know they understand completely.

[JimB]

Irish, I really know how you feel.  I hate to eat alone in a restaurant, go to a movie by myself, so I just go from work, grab something to take home eat, get to spend 45 minutes with her on QQ.  Then on here or internet the rest of the night. Wanting her by your side is the tough part.  Makes you lonely for her.

[TomFisher]

I too feel very lonely and miss wo de Laopo very much!  It was hard finding her and when we found each other it was fantastic.  Then when we had to say goodbye at the airport I was so sad but made the trip home.  Now that I am back I feel more loneliness than I've ever felt.  I guess that is part of the price we pay for finding honest and true love with these magnificent women.  Ronan, as much as it sucks, as hard as it is in the evenings, I would not trade it for anything because each night brings us closer to the day we are together forever.  When I get down I remind myself that each lonely night is one less that I'll have in my lifetime.  Each day is that much closer to the day she will be with me and we will not have to leave.

Hang in there bro, we all know it sucks but we all know better days really are coming.

Peace,

Tom

[Paul Todd]

Waiting, waiting ,waiting. I tried to express this feeling to my lady the other day and she replied " you never have to wait for bad news, but happy times you always wait for" They have a way or saying stuff simply, but it has such deep resonance. I'm doing seasonal work now, come the autumn  and I'll be there! She's even bought the wedding dress Just got to wait until the leaves fall from the trees! Feeling a bit like Li Bai at the moment,only the moon ,my shadow and my wine cup. This forum is a great help.

[Spruik]

Just got to wait until the leaves fall from the trees! Feeling a bit like Li Bai at the moment,only the moon ,my shadow and my wine cup. This forum is a great help.

:idea:

Paul,

Come to this neck of the woods where the leaves are already falling... you can do some time travel... then turn straight for China.

Your shadow will follow you, so will the moon be there. Just bring your wine cup.

Toon

[Paul Todd]

Thanks Toon ,for putting a smile on my face!
Reckon a few guy's here could use a little time travel themselves.......