"Mike" aka China Shark

[JohnB]

I don't know if I am stepping on a few feet, but..
I was rooting around the other forum this morning, like a lot of others here do. I always note Mike, aka "China Shark" is quite active. A long time. Maybe I dredge up old shit as I do not know the member particulars of long ago, but WTF, this guy would liven up a few things here. He brings a few things positive, whatever, depending his admirers/ detractors. One thing though, not one can deny his contributions to the other forum. He livens it up!
One thing for certain, all personalities aside, a moribund thread is a kiss of death. It serves no purpose whatsoever, to anyone interested, in whatever.

My somewhat limited impression of him, he is arrogant to the point of being obnoxiously so, but the thing is, he has pedigree, in all things his China (the real China is undefinable, if we think we know, we are delusional, especially so in regards to women; after all, that is why we are here).
It seems this recent “mea culpa” of his is interesting. If I read this wrong, I apologise to everyone, especially to Mike since he is subject to what I write. 

This is dated the 16thMay.. http://www.chnlove.com/Replies-Dating-Tips-and-Advice-T4411.html
Learning Chinese is the least of all your worries finding a suitable Chinese wife. I've been on this site for coming up on 5 yrs this October and have yet to meet any Chinese that don't have unrealistic expectations. It's part and parcel, live it, learn to deal with it, get over it. Being an old cantankerous foreigner doesn't necessarily make you the cat' meow. The girl I moved to Shenzhen I imagine is living with her pediatrian husband in America now. I'm happy for her, she hit the jackpot or at least in the Chinese mindset. The first 4 months I lived here with her we barely communicated via English {verbal}. Many on the forums think we can change others in life, it ain't that simple. If you're on this site you're either desperate,old, ugly, overweight with social disorders, etc. Personally, I'm not part of the latter class with the exception of being 50 yrs old. Trolls think because you can promise a green card the world is thier oyster. Too many on here like to be accussatory towards agengcies, blah, blah, it's everyone's fault but mine, come on get a grip men children. No one made any of you join up yet alone create these wild fantasies in your dillusion minds. Iniatially yes I was dissappointed yet living here none of any of you have the slightest clue to know what's it's like to struggle in this world. Being Chinese living in a Chinese world sucks, everyone is angling for a better life here even guys like me looking for my great break, to publish my life's work. Till about 3 months ago I never comprehended what it must be like yet now I see with clear eyes and the sobering experience woke me up to the truth, why are we here? To leave our mark, something to let people far in the future that we made a difference in people's life's. For this I've forsaken, family friends the whole shebang to reach my dream. I't not about how many Asian women you sleep with, or how rich or beautiful your girlfriend or wife is. It's about the things that are intangible in life. I met the one in the summer of 2009, she'll always be the one reguardless of how ill mannered or bad I treated her. No how many women I dated or slept with she never escaped my heart. A few months back I stopped all the carrousing and started focusing on myself. If I want a better life I need to be a better person, need to restrain myself from all the negative activities in my life. {smoking, drinking}, train my mind by writing a few hours a day, reading a few hours a day, bodybuilding and strength cardiovascular training. If I want to find my dream I need to find myself first and then I have a bountiful to offer my future Chinese bride. 4 months oe so ago I was the loud ignorant western braggert much like most on here. Then, suddenly an ephinany {spelling} descended from the heavens above me to start over. Sounds faggy but what can I say I am the original unadulterated uncompromised China Shark. Somethings are babysteps, I'm trying already damn it I'm CSM!!!!! Newbies get your pencils and notebooks ready, if you have any pride push aside personalities to achieve and accomplish your goals. Want to be a crybaby, hey, China is filled with those kind of guys. Show the woman you know what it is to be a real man. Westerns have the advantages yet they can't seem to let go of thier own insecurities in life. Give you an example. Girlfriend number one started dating her probably husband a few years ago. She explained our past and that was it. We remained in touch over the years due to our unusual circumstances, also and our birthdays were on the same exact date. She would call me up the first couple of years to go out to dinner for our birthdays. After the second year it was just a birthday phonecall. This doctor dude didn't even like the fact that I lived in the same city with her, I and 12 other million people. Insecurity out the wazoo, big time. Anyway I am always there with a helping hand for the legitimate guys,however they always to be in short supply here though. Gotta go workplace is closing up.

China Shark Mike

[Robertt S]

I think the economic conditions around the globe have put a damper on many sites that involve long distance relationships and foreign travels. Many people currently do not have the resources to even think about a LDR at this time. The ones with the resources are keeping their money rat-holed in case the economy falls back into recession. I think once people feel more comfortable with their finances and economic outlook, they will be back here asking questions.    As far as China Mike, he spends time over at this site also, but it too is suffering the scourge of low traffic and boredom!   

http://www.lovelovechina.com/


P.S.  I own a full-function dating site and can barely give away free memberships now, back in 2008 and 2009 I would have needed to add bandwidth to keep up with membership levels.

[Neil]

It doesn't take much research these days to find out that, if you had the desire to find a Chinese wife, and bring her home, it's bloody difficult, and expensive.  I don't know if it's any easier with a Filipino wife, but I sure see a lot more Filipino women coming to Canada, and they seem to have it a lot easier. 

I read somewhere that something like 25% of Canadians were not born here.  I forget the actual percentage.  It seems like Canada is trying to close the floodgates.  I don't know if it's a good idea or a bad one.

On the subject of Mike, I have no opinion.  He's abrasive to the point of scaring people off, and guys like me aren't going to learn anything from him. 

[shaun]

I really don't have a problem with Mike.  I take all of his outrageous behavior with a grain of salt.

The real problem is that he has burned his bridge with many on this site.  There have been many brutal accusations and comments made.

If my memory serves me correctly, the final straw was when a member here was in China and was having some particular issue with a woman.  Mike took it upon himself to judge the person.  I think he either threatened or went to the hotel to kick the guy's tail.

I can't blame the mods for kicking him off the site.

I really don't think there is a place for him here.

Besides I don't think he would be willing to come back.

[David E]

I dont really have a problem with Mike either....apart from the gross ego-centricity, the tendency to personal abuse, the condescending and patronising manner in which he conducts relationships with others and the automatic assumption that he knows better than anyone about everything.

Mike ( and to a lesser extent, our Willy) are always quick to define the veracity of a relationship with a Chinese Woman as only to be understood if you live in China. It seems that Mike in particular holds in contempt those of us who choose to take our Chinese Partner to our own Country and is always quick to deride those who do this as being knowlege-deficient about all things Chinese Women related.

I have always felt that those Western Men who choose to up-sticks and live in China with their chosen one have the easy bit !! Unless you have been through the emotional meat grinder that is inevitable with Immigration issues, I dont know if you have ever really tested a relationship with a Foreign Lady. From the perspective of completing the process of Migration for our partners, I believe we can consider ourselves the one's who have done it really tough.

As for livening up the Forum...I think Rob is exactly right, The GFC has made Governments a lot less Migration friendly and a lot of guys just dont have the resources to begin a long, complex and expensive mission to find a Foreign Bride...that's probably why our traffic has slowed a lot. To have Mike or similar just come here to stir the pot and get everybody riled up seems to be counter-productive. By all means let's acknowlege that people have different views and should not be discouraged fom airing them, but just to use the Forum for personal abuse would be tragic.

Nevertheless, in its heyday, this Forum was a life-saver for me and many other guys, we had the ability to share experiences and apart from a very few notable exceptions we managed to avoid heaps of personal abuse and vitriol.

Those of us whom have completed our journey are always here with advice and help whenever it is needed, but for the moment we are coasting in neutral due to lack of activity because the demand for info. is low....but we are always around, always reading and still part of the whole thing.

Just my 2 cents worth 

[Vince G]

Mike is Mike, that's who he is. He writes what he thinks and feels. I don't know? I understand him and where he's coming from. And Yes we have had words. When he calms down you tell him again and he will then listen. He tells it like it is, no hiding behind a screen.

[Philip]

China Shark Mike visits his therapist.
Therapist: How are you?
CSM: China Shark Mike is fine.
Therapist: I notice you often refer to yourself in the third person. Why don't you just say "I"?
CSM  : I am China Shark Mike!
Therapist: OK. Let's move on. You talk a lot about other men being desperate, ugly, old, overweight, with social disorders, etc. What are your fears?
CSM: I'm none of those things, except getting old, but I work out, so I don't even look old. How do I know? Because people tell me. China Shark looks 35.
Therapist: You seem ever-so-slightly over-identified with your own opinions. Do you think you're the only Western man to have lived in China?
CSM: (repeats his litany of girlfriend experiences, teaching experiences, I'm so misunderstood experiences, Shenzhen experiences, descriptions of how long he's been in China, and discrediting of anyone who hasn't lived in China)
Therapist: Ermm. You didn't answer my question.
CSM: I just did. China Shark is China Shark. I say what I see. Sorry if the truth offends you, but I'm not going to sugar-coat it. You're just like all the rest, come to China, thinking some beautiful young girl half your age will fall in love with you just because you're Western. Ain't gonna happen. Wake up and smell the coffee. Listen to the shark. He tells it like is. You're just like all the rest!
Therapist: OK Mike. Count to ten. Breathe. Good. Now Mike, you know that I'm not in China, don't you? I'm Skyping this session from LA. I'm a happily-married man, have been for the past 30 years, and I have never been to China. I should remind you that, much as I enjoy hearing you repeat the same stories about your life, this is costing you 200 dollars an hour, which, as you constantly inform me about the minutest details of your salary, tells me that you need to work 10 extra hours this week to pay for this session.
CSM: I am China Shark!
Therapist: Yes Mike. (sighs, hangs up)

[Willy The Londoner]

Mike is who he is. 

I have only one problem and that is trying to read his longer writings.

 I just wish he used paragraphs so that when  this desperate,old, ugly, overweight person with a reading disorder pauses at the end of a sentence then I do not lose my place and have to start way back again.

Other than that he is blunt and to the point, much like me but then at my age it is more than anticipated it is expected!

I also agree with David E. I have always proclaimed that those fighting for immigration rights for their partners had have a much harder time than me and often wonder if I had not decided on my present course years ago that I maybe have not completed the process.  For many this forum has been a life line in many ways.   When I first came on here there were not many who already had even married let alone started out on the immigration trail. Now we are all approaching those elder years and one day, with any luck, everyone on here will be waking up to become my age and say 'I did it my way'.

But it wont be long now before I start the reverse process.  That may be a challenge for me and that is to apply for my Chinese 'Green Card'
I will see how it goes. 

It may well be easier than getting a Chinese Drivers Licence or it may not.  But then getting the licence is a lot easier than actually driving in the old part of the city with its narrow streets and with 99% of the drivers having no consideration for other road users.   Mind you traffic laws are being applied more and more even taxi drivers tell you to belt up now days. 

Willy

[Martin]

Everyone makes good points....but Philip nailed it!!! Hahaha

[RobertBfrom aust]

Whilst it maybe quiet here as it is also on other sites pertaining to China there are new members joining all be it slowly , but as has been usual we do have a number of " Lookers " who are gaining info from this site without joining , regards Sujuan and Robert .

[fivetrout]

Hello all,
For me, having read everything from the other site...I like Mikes "bitch slap" to the glassed eyed newbies that are about to make every mistake we already made. I was one of them once, with a Ukrainian gal, and that agency got me for $900 smackers. If only there was a China Mike for me then, because a smack was exactly what I needed! His brash demeanor only balances out some of the tender personalities here.

Chris

[David E]

Mike is Mike, that's who he is. He writes what he thinks and feels. I don't know? I understand him and where he's coming from. And Yes we have had words. When he calms down you tell him again and he will then listen. He tells it like it is, no hiding behind a screen.

Erm........ I think you should rephrase that Vince  "He tells it like HE decides it is"....no other veiwpoint or opinion has any weight at all.

[brett]

China Shark posted a few useful rants here just before I had the Miss Woo saga. I saved one or two of them as I found them inspiring. Well he certainly made it clear how much work is involved in finding a good woman here  .

Anyway, it seems the whole non-EU foreign bride thing is effectively dead in the UK now unless you have a load of cash and/or a good job. And my understanding is that if you want to marry a woman and bring her kids from a previous marriage over then you'll need to be earning way above the average wage or have a five figure bank account. It's not just men having troubles - women marrying guys from Japan and the USA have also been caught out.

I find it hard to stomach, especially as my job was taken by an Eastern European and an Indian, and now the UK government is letting in tens of thousands of Somalis, Romanians etc. etc. etc.

Still, it's becoming a more attractive option to live elsewhere. If you can solve the main problems (earning money and getting a visa) and have nothing major holding you back home, then just do it. I'm having a fabulous time in China  . Although if I was starting afresh I'd go to Thailand or the Phillies - China is just work, work, work and it gets boring after a while.

As to ladies, well I dated 3 Chinese ladies last week. One was wonderful but a little too young. One was the most beautiful Cantonese lady I've ever seen, but she was mad. Seen exactly the same type of girl before. And the last one has potential, I hope I can see her again.

But don't get the impression that all Western guys here are just seeking Chinese wives. They're still very much a minority and I've not seen that many foreigners with Chinese ladies. And as for the older English teachers, they seem to be here mostly to escape from women problems back home, rather than to date the ladies out here.

And on the money thing, well that's just a cultural thing. I visited a marriage agency here last week and they spent a lot of time asking me about my job, income, family etc. etc. etc. but there wasn't much mention of love  .

[fivetrout]

I know it will be a struggle getting Hong over here, and to think about how many thousand illegals will probably cross the border...just tonight. And I heard their numbers are swelling as talk of a immigration bill is in the works.

[maxx]

As long as you play by the rules.And hire a good immigration attorney.To make your visa application look all nice and complete.It is a walk in the park.Do the application by yourself.Use a attorney no one has heard of.You may get another immigration interview in a couple of years.